Liplocked Lullabies

It was Saturday. I was home alone, and reading a book.

I wasn't concentrating though, and found myself constantly reading the same line over and over, since I always had something on my mind.

Or someone, I should say.

Ever since the day I had visited Jacob, I had been thinking about him, and the bonfire. I had always heard of the bonfire, but never actually went.

At least once a month, Billy would hold a bonfire down by First Beach, where most of the residents of La Push would go. All of them would go actually, except me and my mother. Billy would tell old Quileute legends.

Sue Clearwater would always put out stuff for s'mores, and the smaller kids would play around with firecrackers or fireworks.

I used to beg Embry to bring me back a s'more and he did. It was rubbery and burned, but I usually ate it anyway and I was grateful. It was a little piece of the party.

Embry and his friends would never let me go with them, and I never tried to make them.

Occasionally, I would go out on our back porch and watch the fireworks, if there were any, and read a book. But now it was finally my chance to go. To be a part of the La Push life.

I couldn't contain my excitement much longer, and soon gave up on the book all together. The house was silent.

Embry had gone out on one of his escapades, and my mother was working again. I was suffocating in a slow painful death of boredom, and was determined to find something to do. And so far, I was failing.

I was watching a re-run of the Hills, a yawn escaping my mouth, when I heard a sharp rapping noise coming from the direction of the door.

I glanced at the hideous floral clock hanging above the television, and made it out to be around 5-ish.

Jacob wasn’t due for another hour.

My mother wouldn't be home until seven, and Embry had a set of keys to get into the house.

Curious about the stranger at my house, I made my way to the door and opened it, surprised.

At my door stood Jacob Black, but instead of looking his usual self, he looked different.

Distraught.

Worried.

Ready to bawl his eyes out.

His eyes were red and puffy, and his jaw was clenched. When he saw me, he forced out a weak smile.

"Can I come in?" he croaked out, and I just stood there in shock.

Managing a nod, I extended the door wider, so he could enter. He stumbled inside the house, and took a seat on the couch. I followed suit.

I had never been in a real situation like this. Jacob looked heartbroken, and I had no idea what to say. He was muffling sobs again, and I inched towards him. I didn't say anything and neither did he, and I knew that this was the best that I could do.

Silence was the best gift I could give.

He sat down for a while, shaking slightly and crying, before pacing around the room. I rubbed his back soothingly, though my small hands barely made a complete circle around his large back.

His back burned under my touch, and I assumed that he was sick. He probably had a high fever.

It could have been hours, maybe minutes or even a few seconds, but time was no matter to me. I was with Jacob, and I wanted to comfort him.

We sat together for a while, the only sound the ticking of the clock and the sobs ripping from his throat. Eventually, he stopped. And looked up at me, wiping his eyes.

"Thanks." He muttered, his eyes filled with such emotion, that I became alarmed.

"No problem."

I considered lying, playing dumb and asking him why he was telling me thanks, or even moving away, but that would cause too much conflict.

"I'm really sorry, you missed your bonfire."

I looked up at the clock and noticed it was well past seven.

"It's okay." I paused, and realized that it really was okay. "There are other bonfires."

"I feel really bad about making you miss it though."

"It's fine."

"It's just—" he struggled for words to say, and ended with a huff. "Bella."

"Bella." I was intrigued now, but kept the I-told-you-so tone away from my voice. I should have known.

His eyes met mine, and he stopped, dropping his hands limply to his side. He seemed to gawk at me for a minute, staring at me in complete silence.

I suddenly felt self conscious, and rubbed my tongue against my cheek, checking for any food wedged between my teeth. I found nothing though, and glanced back at him.

"Is there something on my face?" I asked, patting my cheeks. They felt fine.

He shook his head wordlessly, still a little dazed. He looked like he was calculating something, and I could hear him mouthing off numbers. He looked confused.

"Jacob?" I became worried. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine?" He seemed to ask, not intending it to be a statement. He cleared his throat, breaking the awkward silence. "I'm fine."

"So…Bella?"

"Bella!"

He was back in his dazed state, as though things were piecing together slowly. His eyes were no longer puffy, and he was smiling. He was looking at me and smiling.

"Jacob. Are you okay?" He was starting to creep me out.

"I'm fine." He repeated. "I'm fantastic."

"What just happened?"

"Nothing." He said quickly. He was covering something up. "It's just…Bella."

"What about Bella?" He was silent again.

"Listen up, Jacob." I was getting impatient now. "What is going on?"

"Bella got back together with her boyfriend." He bluted out.

It didn't seem to bother him now, as it had a few minutes before. He looked happy, relieved even.

"What?" I couldn't help but mutter.

Jacob was—no. He had never actually told me that Bella was his girlfriend. I had just assumed. That meant…

"You and Bella aren't dating?!"

"Why would you think that?" His face was blank.

"She always followed you around…and you seemed so close. She talked about you a lot and that day in the woods…"

"That day in the woods?"

"Yeah, when you saw me." No point hiding it now.

"We were having some…problems. That's all."

"Oh."

We were two big confused messes, sitting on my couch. We sat side by side now, looking at the worn coffee table, feeling defeated.

"Journey," Jacob eventually broke the silence. "I want you to know that I would never date Bella."

He was looking at me again, and there was something in his eyes. He had on a lopsided smile, though his eyes were dark and smoldering. It sent slight shivers down my spine, but I brushed it off as the cold.

"Okay." I muttered, looking at him again.

I glanced back at the hideous floral clock, and noticed that it was well past eight. My mother would be home soon. She would probably start having palpitations if she saw Jacob and I on the couch.

Jacob looked back at the clock and sent me a small smile.

"I better be going. I'm real' sorry I wasted your time."

"You didn't waste my time." I laughed, noticing the guilty look on Jacob's face.

"Bye then." He sent me one last smile, before disappearing. "See you later."

"Bye."

I thought about what he said.

See you later.

A promise of sorts. He would see me again.

"See you later." I echoed, closing the door behind me.