You & I Collide

Rachel

Guilt is a poisonous snake that entangles itself in your body, constricting around your lungs until you find that you can hardly breathe. It chokes you and causes you severe pain that you cannot escape. This was exactly the case for me as I drove along the road to the Cullen house rather than the Uley residence - where the wolf packs were. But I silenced that guilt, knowing that it was pointless. I was with Emmett, now, and Paul was no longer what he had been.

Everybody knew by now - the Cullens, and the wolves. They all knew about my choice, and they all had their own opinions. Some of them voiced them.

I remembered what Jacob had said when he had come home from a patrol, after Paul had told him in thoughts. He had exploded, not into a wolf, but in anger.

"Rachel, what do you think you're doing?" he had snarled. "Please, please tell me you had hit your head or something...because...otherwise...you are being really stupid."

"It's not like it matters to you. I mean, you and Paul are in different packs, now, even if you are coordinating."

"Exactly," he spat. "and now we all have to cope with his pain...we all have to go through it, too. How could you be so cold-hearted and selfish, Rachel? I thought you were more than that."

"I am," I had retorted.

Jacob had snorted. "Sure, sure. And you obviously have no sense of who the right guy is for you. I mean...a Cullen? Seriously?"

It felt like he had slapped me. "Don't be such a hypocrite, Jacob. Who's the one who imprinted on a Cullen?"

"That's not what I meant. I love Renesmee, and I don't hate the Cullens. But that doesn't mean that I'm gonna let my sister fall in love with one of them."

"Who's the older sibling, here, Jacob?" I asked.

"That doesn't matter!" he hissed. "What matters is this: I imprinted on Renesmee involuntarily; you threw yourself at Emmett of your own accord. It was a stupid choice, Rachel, and you've hurt Paul...bad."

I didn't want to think about how I had hurt Paul as I pulled into the Cullens' long, winding driveway. I parked my car and then proceeded to walk up the steps. Alice would know I was coming, of course, and she or someone else would be sent to open the door before I had a chance to knock.

But when I reached the door, nothing happened. It didn't open. This was very srange; I frowned. What was going on? I waited half a minute. Still nothing. Then, in an unfamiliar manner considering the present location, I knocked, three quick raps on the door.

The huge door swung open, and there was Carlisle. His expression terrified me. It was a stunned expression of loss and agony, before he quickly composed it into a smooth one.

"Rachel," he said, "I'm sorry. Alice had said you were coming, but..."

"But what?" I asked in a hushed tone. "Carlisle?"

He just shook his head and gestured me in. When I entered the living room, the Cullens were sitting there, each of them with a look that matched the one Carlisle had before he had changed his expression. Emmett was sitting on the couch, his face in his hands, with Esme rubbing his shoulder in a comforting way.

"Emmett?" I whispered. He didn't look up. "Emmett!" I cried out, the sound strangely loud in the deep, ominous silence. I rushed over to sit next to him.

"Rachel," he breathed, sitting up to look at me. "I'm sorry. I know that I left her...but...she's still my sister. And, even though things are different between us now, I still love her in that way."

It was then that I finally noticed.

Rosalie.

Rosalie was missing.

"Where's Rosalie? What happened?" I asked, my tone frantic. I looked around at all their faces - Bella was comforting little Nessie; Edward looked shocked and pained; Jasper and Alice were holding hands as they sat together on the floor, her head on his shoulder as they wore matching expressions of anguish; Carlisle had come to sit next to Esme and put an arm around her shoulders in comfort.

It was Alice who told me, seeming like the only one brave enough to speak.

"She's gone," Alice told me in a breath of air, and then the silence that followed was dark and daunting as that sunk in.