Dont Take The Girl

I was holding my wife's had, Clutching a damp washcloth in my free hand. My face was turned into some sort of a grimace, because she was squeezing my hand so hard. I dabbed the washcloth across her forehead, wiping the sweat from her face to cool her off.

"Your doing great baby." I encouraged her, placing a kiss on her temple as she smiled up at me. Her lips were curved up, she looked in pain and worn out, but she was happy. I could see it in her eyes.

"Okay. Just one more big push." Dr. Casey said form her position in-between my wife's legs.

"Three, Push." I prepared myself for the pain again, counting along with the nurse.

When I heard the first cry, I tore my eyes away from my wife's, to see the doctor holding the most beautiful baby girl I had ever seen. When I turned back to my wife, a smile plastered on my face, tears welled up in my eyes, I expect to see the same expression from her, but I don't. My smile instantly drops. He eyes were closed, and she was so white she looked like a ghost.

That's when the beeping started, and I was being shoved out pf the way so fast I couldn't even blink.

My heart was racing. I looked around the room, everyone was moving in slow motion. I saw my daughter being carried away by a nurse, and my wife being surround by what seems to be an army of nurses. they were forming a wall between the teo of us, and I didn't like it.

I tried to push through them, but they pushed me back, one of them breaking away to escourt me out of the room.

The last thing I saw was my wife's pale hand, the same one I had been holding just minutes before. It fell limply off the side of the hospital bed she'd been laying in for the past 19 hours.

In the hall I collapsed to my knees, praying to God under my breath, as the tears fell from my eyes. I silently asked God that just this once he would answer my prayers.

The doors bust open, and I was up on my feet running right next to my wife's rolling bed.

"Is she gonna be alright?" I asked no one inparticular.

"She's lost a lot of blood. She was hemorraging, but we were able to slow it down a bit, shes going to need surgery."

"Do anything you can, please, I can't lose her." I pleaded with all of them. The tears became unstoppable as they streamed down my face, blurring my vision.

"Were going to do our best." One of the nurses said as she stepped in front of me, stopping me from going any further.

They pushed her bed through the emergency doors that said, 'Authorized Personnel Only'. I watched them through the little window in the door as they carried her away.

"I love you." I whispered just before they turned the corner, and she was out of my sight once again.

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I lost the love of my life that day. There was just too much blood, and not enough time.

I still think every once in a while that, if I hadn't looked away those two seconds that she would still be here. Or I would have noticed.

The first three months after losing her were the hardest. I was so depressed that my older brother had to take my daughter away from me. For her own safety and health.

I'll never forget the day that he brought her back to me. Two months later, a head full of blond curls, and the brightest blue eyes i'd ever seen since my wife.

He forced me to hold my crying daughter, and just look at her. That was my moment of clarity. I had been blaming her this whole time. How could I blame such an innocent little person for something so horrible?

"She needs you." Jake had told me, as I stared at the little girl in my arms. "And you need her. She lost something that day too. She will never know who her mother is. At least you had the five years with her that you did."

Hearing him say those things. the things I had heard so many times before,they finally hit me.

I finally realized that even though I did lose my wife, I still had my daughter, and I would always have a little piece of her with me.