Too Much

[ Alex Gaskarth ]

It was six twenty. Jasey should have been here twenty minutes ago. I paced my room nervously as I started to come up with a million reasons why she wasn’t here. Most of them involved freak accidents, but then there were the few of her standing me up, even though she promised she wouldn’t. I can see her reasoning with herself that I deserve to be stood up. My ego’s too big for my own good, as she’d say.

I glanced out my window again, at the street in front of my house. The car her and Jewels share was nowhere in sight. I groaned and let the curtain fall as I start to pace again. She had her reasons to stay away from me, but I wished she wouldn’t. Oh, how I wished.

There was car door slam outside and I held my breath. I didn’t dare go to the window again, knowing I’d only find disappointment for the umpteenth time. There was a soft knock that echoed through the house but I didn’t move. It was probably just my mind tricking me.

Then there was her soft spoken voice, in my house. I practically ran from my room and down the stairs, entering as Jasey and Matt eyed each other oddly.

“So you really came,” Matt shook his head and then shrugged. “I figured he was lying when he said you were coming over.” He chuckled and glanced at me before heading to my living room. I was still standing on the stairs as I stared at Jasey.

She smiled timidly and tucked a bit of hair behind her ear. “I didn’t know Matty was going to be here.” She sounded a little embarrassed as she looked around the small hallway. I had to snap my thoughts from how good she looked to talk.

“Yeah, I thought you might be more comfortable if somebody else was with us.” I cursed in my head at how stupid I sounded. My sentence made it sounded like we were little kids who needed a chaperone.

“Thanks.” Jasey giggled and shifted a bit as she looked down. “Oh, I, uh, brought your jacket. You know, since I forgot it this morning and all.” She extended the jacket toward me and I had to yell at my feet to make them move. Once I made it into arms distance with Jasey, I had to bite down on my bottom lip to keep self control. Course it didn’t help much so I had to bite down harder, probably close to drawing blood. She just smelled so good. A clean, soapy smell that was twisted with her old cinnamon scent that used to drive me crazy. Hell, it still drove me crazy. It made me want to touch her, hold her, and kiss her everywhere. “So this is your house?” Her voice interrupted my hazy state and I had to push thoughts of carrying her up to my bedroom away to answer her.

“Yeah, I got a killer deal on it.” I broke my vision from her, knowing if I stared any longer she’d get uncomfortable and I’d do something stupid. “The guys usual pack all their stuff here when we go on long tours. Makes it so they don’t have to pay extra rent and stuff,” I busied myself with hanging my jacket up as I talked and Jasey slipped off her shoes.

“Well that’s nice of you.” She smiled and started down the hallway, stopping here and there to examine things closer. “Oh my god,” she muttered as she reached the frame poster of The Beatles. I chuckled at her reaction and admired it beside her. “It’s even got their signatures.” I don’t think she was really talking to me as she stared and started to trace George’s signature with her finger.

“Believe it or not, I got that off eBay for about four dollars.” She turned her wide eyes to me as her lips parted in shock. It was the perfect instant to kiss her, but I restrained, forcing my eyes back to the picture. Kissing her would most definitely lead to screams and kicks.

“I may just have to break in when you’re touring and steal it.” Jasey smirked before facing forward and finishing the short walk down the hallway to the living room. Matt was already stretched out on the love seat with a beer in his hand. I smiled at my wise choice to invite him as we entered.

Matt was perfect for the role. Jack would have been too hyper and attracted Jasey’s attention too much. Zack would have wanted to bring up Jewels every two minutes with her, trying to get an inside opinion and such. Rian would have ignored us both with texting Kara, which probably would have made Jasey unsettled. But Matt, Matt was perfect. Jasey and him got along great, and Matt had a way of giving off a relaxed atmosphere that I knew she’d need to get through this. Plus he was laid back enough so he wouldn’t freak out that Jasey and I were being civil to each other.

“So what are we watching?” Matt questioned as I sat down on the couch.

“It’s Jasey’s pick.” I told him and he nodded while Jasey looked around uneasily. “The movies are under there.” I pointed toward the entertainment center and she nodded before walking over. I watched as she sat on the ground cross-legged and tilted her head while she scanned the titles. It made my smile have a sad twinge to it as I wished for the old days. Jasey always tilted her head sideways while she read titles off the boxes, and usually after she picked one she’d come cuddle up to my side. What I’d give for that now.

“Are we in a horror or comedy mood?” Jasey mused out loud. I chuckled as well as Matt.

“You know no matter what we say, you’re going to pick whatever movie it is you want to watch.” Matt rolled his eyes while Jasey stuck her tongue out at him over her shoulder. She tried to be sneaky as she grabbed a box and opened it, placing the DVD into the player.

“How does this fucking thing work?” She asked, already frustrated with the technology. I shook my head, knowing she was only seconds away from banging at the equipment.

“Just move; I’ve got the remote.” Matt chuckled some more as Jasey pouted and trudged back to the couch, sitting as far away as possible from me. “Aw, don’t make that face little Jasey. It doesn’t suite you.”

“Why must you always call me ‘little Jasey’, I’m not little anymore you know!” She crossed her arms over her chest as she sent a fake glare toward Matt.

“You’ll always be little Jasey to me, even when you’re in your thirties and have two kids.” Matt leaned his head back to wink at her before turning on the TV. My chest swelled at the thought of kids, kids with Jasey. The room seemed to get cold as we waited for the outburst. Strangely, the screaming and throwing things didn’t come.

Jasey scoffed. “I am not having kids.” The swelling disappeared as my chest tightened. Her tone wasn’t hateful or really cold. It was just normal, and that scared me more.

“Right; now what did you put in?” Matt quickly changes the subject as he notices his mistake. No one ever mentions kids around Jasey when I’m in the same room. It’s just not done.

“It’s a surprise.” Jasey sang as she settled in a comfy spot and glued her eyes to the TV. Three minutes later and the menu screen for The Rocky Horror Picture Show came up. Nobody said anything as Matt hit play.

I tried to watch the movie, but the truth is, Jasey was so much more interesting.