Too Much

[ Jasey Rae ]

I groaned inwardly as I pulled at the bottom of my dress. It drove me crazy to be in a dress and the fact that I could reach the bottom of this dress was setting my nerves on fire. I should have figured Jewels would put me in the shortest dress known to man.

“I feel ridiculous.” I hissed into Damon’s ear. I was thankful that we both ended up with Saturday off, then again he was the boss.

“But you look gorgeous.” He whispered back in my ear as we entered the Barakat’s backyard. I used to find it semi-funny how the Barakat’s place was always neutral territory. Jewels was my best friend and Jack was Alex’s.

“Oh, shut up,” I rolled my eyes and playfully smacked his arm that was locked with my own.

“I’m only telling the truth.” Damon gave me a bright smile as he opened the small white gate for me. I smiled a little as we entered the official barbeque atmosphere. Ten steps in and Mr. and Mrs. Merrick were already waving me over.

Thirty minutes later, I’d hugged everyone and chatted lightly as I introduced Damon. Everyone was so interested in Damon and he loved it. He loved pretending that there was something more between us, and I let him. I let him because Gaskarth was there.

He kept his distance, staying about twenty feet away from us at all times, but he also kept staring. His eyes burned into me and I swear I saw his mouth form my name a few times. It wasn’t until we sat down to eat that I had to face him. Jack and Jewels must have had a real good laugh when they placed my seat across from his and Damon’s practically on the other end of the table.

“So how was work yesterday?” Rian tried starting conversation since he was the one sitting at the end of the table, between Gaskarth and I. I stared at him blankly before I remembered I had lied.

“Uh, busy. You know I work in a Starbucks.” I rolled my eyes and smiled. As long as we kept things light, there would be no fiasco.

“Why do you work in a Starbucks?” Gaskarth’s head tilted so that some of his hair fell in his eyes. It felt like a personal attack and I could already feel the anger coming to the surface. “I mean, you were so passionate with a camera back in school. Why didn’t you ever pursue it?” My stomach churned while I stared down at my plate.

“I wasn’t so sure about my future during that senior year and by the time I got my shit together it was too late to apply for Arts School.” I spoke through my gritted teeth and I barely paid attention to Rian sigh.

“Why don’t you pick it up again then?” I looked up to meet his gaze in shock. He didn’t argue. He didn’t start a fight like was so accustomed when this subject came up. Instead he moved on and changed the subject, like the fact that I was angry at him didn’t faze him.

“I don’t know.” I wasn’t able to come up with a better answer as I dropped my eyes to my plate again. If felt abnormal to talk to him like this, like we were back at sixteen.

“Well, I think you should.” Alex commented and took a bite of egg salad. “You had such talent.” I nodded and pushed my food around on my plate. Suddenly I wanted nothing more than to turn invisible.

“Thanks.” I mumbled, still unable to find more than simple words. Things just weren’t right and it felt all too fake. I glanced down the table at Damon longingly. He was laughing and having a great time while I was dying to leave.