Status: Active
Jizz In My Pants
Chapter 1
“Look what I’m making Barbie do!!!” Alex proceeded to shove a Barbie Doll down his pants while giggling. Rian soon followed suit as they played around in the toy section of Wal-Mart. They had claimed to be here for scientific purposes; they needed test dummies for an experiment. It was Alex’s brilliant idea to see how fast a Barbie’s head would catch on fire using a magnifying glass.
While Rian and Alex were playing around with the Barbies, Jack and Zack were looking at the baby dolls. “Zack, your boobs are so big, you could probably breast feed.”
“They’re called pecks! I do not have moobs!” Zack laughed and threw a baby at Jack. Jack retaliated by throwing another baby at him. Soon enough, a plastic fetus war was in full swing.
“FETUS FIGHT!” Rian and Alex, with Barbies still shoved down their pants, came over to assist Zack and Jack. Trying to avoid a rather rotund baby that was going to hit him in the face, Jack turned around. It was then when he saw the woman that would change his life forever.
Skateboarding across the aisle was a girl around seventeen with no pants on, carrying a box of Twinkies. Her long, brown hair flowed beautifully behind her as she skated by. Jack instantly fell in love with this scantily clad, Twinkie bearing gal. Chasing her was a girl about the same age, but significantly shorter. She was carrying a bass guitar in one hand and reaching for Twinkie girl with the other. Zack noticed the shorter one and was mesmerized. When he noted her bass guitar, he too fell in love. Taking advantage of both boys dazed state, Rian and Alex nailed both of them in the face with Baby-Zilla. They fell to the ground shouting expletives.
“JESUS FUCKING CHRIST! That’s one big ass baby!” Jack had his hands over his face, trying to get it to stop hurting.
Zack, although stunned for a second, got right back up. Extending an arm out to Jack, he lifted him up and they proceeded to run out of the store, as an employee was chasing them with a rifle screaming, “There shall be no baby throwing in my store!”
Everyone laughed and caught their breath as they ran from inside Wal-Mart to the parking lot. “That was funny as hell. We need to go there more often.”
“Alex, that may be a problem. Look.” Jack pointed to a sign that was being hung up in the store window. It clearly showed big pictures of all of the boys and said “DO NOT LET IN.”
“God damn it!” Feeling defeated, Alex looked to the ground. Then, he noticed that he still had three Barbie dolls down his pants. “YEAH BOY! We have our dummies!” Alex took this opportunity to dance around his mother’s car that they used to get there like it was a bonfire in a Native American powwow. “Ugh, speaking of dummies…”All of a sudden, a Red Bull van pulled up to where Alex’s mom’s car was. Everyone groaned. It was the people they hated most: Metro Station.
Trace came out of the van first and did a very gay flip of the hair. “Sup, bitches!”
Mason Musso came out of the van as well, hooking his fingers in his belt loops and sticking his nose in the air. “Well well well. For it isn’t All Time Low. Tell me, what brings you to Wal-Mart on this fine day?”
Rian laughed and replied with, “Nothing you guys would ever do. We’re picking up chicks.”
Trace and Mason turned to each other and let out a very fake, planned laugh. Then Mason went back to his “cool” face. “Those Barbies shoved down your pants are the closest thing to action that you’ll ever get, Dawson.”
Jack pushed Mason into the hood of his van. “Go suck a dick, Metro Sexual!” He stepped back and all of All Time Low laughed at the shock on Mason’s face.
Oh no, Jack had really done it now. Trace hates it when people disgrace the name of his band. Pointing one finger in the air and one at Jack, Trace yelled, “Metro Ninjas! Attack!” On command, Anthony and Blake jumped out of the van wielding shaken up Red Bull cans.
Alex, Rian, Zack, and Jack all went into their van and got four boxes of Twinkies. The epic battle soon to be named “The Epic Battle Of Twinkies And Red Bull” in the history books commenced when Jack dropped his pants to the ground and hollered, “May the death of Metro Sexual be remembered on this day! Brothers, attack!”
While Rian and Alex were playing around with the Barbies, Jack and Zack were looking at the baby dolls. “Zack, your boobs are so big, you could probably breast feed.”
“They’re called pecks! I do not have moobs!” Zack laughed and threw a baby at Jack. Jack retaliated by throwing another baby at him. Soon enough, a plastic fetus war was in full swing.
“FETUS FIGHT!” Rian and Alex, with Barbies still shoved down their pants, came over to assist Zack and Jack. Trying to avoid a rather rotund baby that was going to hit him in the face, Jack turned around. It was then when he saw the woman that would change his life forever.
Skateboarding across the aisle was a girl around seventeen with no pants on, carrying a box of Twinkies. Her long, brown hair flowed beautifully behind her as she skated by. Jack instantly fell in love with this scantily clad, Twinkie bearing gal. Chasing her was a girl about the same age, but significantly shorter. She was carrying a bass guitar in one hand and reaching for Twinkie girl with the other. Zack noticed the shorter one and was mesmerized. When he noted her bass guitar, he too fell in love. Taking advantage of both boys dazed state, Rian and Alex nailed both of them in the face with Baby-Zilla. They fell to the ground shouting expletives.
“JESUS FUCKING CHRIST! That’s one big ass baby!” Jack had his hands over his face, trying to get it to stop hurting.
Zack, although stunned for a second, got right back up. Extending an arm out to Jack, he lifted him up and they proceeded to run out of the store, as an employee was chasing them with a rifle screaming, “There shall be no baby throwing in my store!”
Everyone laughed and caught their breath as they ran from inside Wal-Mart to the parking lot. “That was funny as hell. We need to go there more often.”
“Alex, that may be a problem. Look.” Jack pointed to a sign that was being hung up in the store window. It clearly showed big pictures of all of the boys and said “DO NOT LET IN.”
“God damn it!” Feeling defeated, Alex looked to the ground. Then, he noticed that he still had three Barbie dolls down his pants. “YEAH BOY! We have our dummies!” Alex took this opportunity to dance around his mother’s car that they used to get there like it was a bonfire in a Native American powwow. “Ugh, speaking of dummies…”All of a sudden, a Red Bull van pulled up to where Alex’s mom’s car was. Everyone groaned. It was the people they hated most: Metro Station.
Trace came out of the van first and did a very gay flip of the hair. “Sup, bitches!”
Mason Musso came out of the van as well, hooking his fingers in his belt loops and sticking his nose in the air. “Well well well. For it isn’t All Time Low. Tell me, what brings you to Wal-Mart on this fine day?”
Rian laughed and replied with, “Nothing you guys would ever do. We’re picking up chicks.”
Trace and Mason turned to each other and let out a very fake, planned laugh. Then Mason went back to his “cool” face. “Those Barbies shoved down your pants are the closest thing to action that you’ll ever get, Dawson.”
Jack pushed Mason into the hood of his van. “Go suck a dick, Metro Sexual!” He stepped back and all of All Time Low laughed at the shock on Mason’s face.
Oh no, Jack had really done it now. Trace hates it when people disgrace the name of his band. Pointing one finger in the air and one at Jack, Trace yelled, “Metro Ninjas! Attack!” On command, Anthony and Blake jumped out of the van wielding shaken up Red Bull cans.
Alex, Rian, Zack, and Jack all went into their van and got four boxes of Twinkies. The epic battle soon to be named “The Epic Battle Of Twinkies And Red Bull” in the history books commenced when Jack dropped his pants to the ground and hollered, “May the death of Metro Sexual be remembered on this day! Brothers, attack!”
♠ ♠ ♠
As you can probably tell, I love to make fun of Metro Station. They will be made fun of SEVERAL times in the story, so if you like them, I apologize. (I really do like them, but it's hard not to make fun of them. I mean really, they're so full of themselves. XD)My other story is going on a small break because I've run out of ideas. While I formulate where that story is going, I will post chapters of this one. It's already pre-written, so if you want a new chapter, all I have to do it type it up.
Enjoy!
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