Did We All Fall Down, Well After All

::Next Morning::
::Hannah's POV::

Burning my tongue on the hot oatmeal my grandmother just gave me was the last thing I needed at this moment. I was a nervous wreck, bouncing my leg up and down under the table in uncontrolable aniticipation. "Can we go?" I asked for the fifth time that morning. She looked over at me, smirking the same smirk that my father had. Must be genetic. I wish he was here to comfort me. I wish Bert was here to comfort me.

"You're appointment isn't until 10:30. Just relax. When they take your blood pressure, they're going to flip."

"But I want to know if my baby is alright! And I want to know what it looks like," I told her defiantly.

"Sweety, I highly doubt if they did an ultrasound you would be able to see anything. Maybe a head and a body, but nothing more." My eyes narrowed, thinking about what she said while taking a sip of cold water to ease the pain of the taste buds I had singed off. My hand unconsciously held the bottom half of my stomach, a mothering habit I had developed recently. I wished that my belly was bigger so I could show it off, but then again I was gratefully since teenage pregnancy was never taken lightly. But hey, at least I wasn't getting an abortion.

::Third Person POV::

Hannah leaned her head against the wall behind her, a light hearted smile falling apon her lips. She closed her eyes and let go of a sigh filled with contentment.

"Can he come stay with us?" Donna turned around to face the child.

"Who sweety?" Hannah came back from her daze and glanced over at her.

"Bert," she said, the sides of her lips still turned upwards. Donna looked over at Hannah, a spark of nervousness in her eye.

“But I want to have time with you to myself to bond.” Hannah’s face crinkled up.

“Alright.” Donna relaxed, relieved that she dropped the subject so easily, but knowing that it would quickly come up again.

“How about you go into the living room and watch some cartoons. We’ll leave in a little bit.” Hannah smiled, jumped up from the table and ran into the room at the front of the house. Donna quietly stepped out of the kitchen and into her bedroom. She knew how to raise teenage boys, but girls were entirely different. At least she didn’t have to wash sheets every other morning. She chortled silently to herself as she reminisced on how embarrassed her boys would be in the morning, stumbling over every other word that passed their lips. Donald would just laugh, clap them on their backs, tell them it proved that they are real men and go back to reading the paper.

The thought of her boys made her remember that Ray wouldn’t tell her what was going on. Hopefully, someone would be more willing to spill now that they had had a night’s rest.

::Frank’s POV::

There was a loud crash from the back of the bus that made me jolt up from my seated position in the front lounge. I had been dozing off for the last five hours, but never actually got to sleep, which sucked.

“What was that?” I asked, leaning my head so I could see down the hall. My eyes didn’t like what they saw. Gerard fumbled around towards his bunk, digging through his bag. Bob’s head curiously stuck out of his bunk. Gerard brought his hand up to his mouth and leaned his head backwards, dropping an orange pill into his system. And it definitely wasn’t Aspirin. He had somehow managed to find more booze last night and got drunk off his ass. Worm had to carry him into the bus since he couldn’t walk on his own.

Gerard pulled the hood of his jacket over his head and walked towards the front, sitting across from me. Bob went back to his bunk. “Good morning,” I tried. He nodded, refusing to look up at me. “You want something to eat? We have crackers,” I offered. He didn’t move, his eyes glued to the thin carpet. He was quiet. Like Mikey used to be.

Like Mikey.

When he had seen Gerard drunk last night, he ran. He ran far away towards the road filled with cars rushing by. Afraid that he was going to get hit, Ray went after him and caught him right before they crashed into the pavement. Mikey was screaming, flailing around like a man on fire. “Let go of me!!” he had shouted in Ray’s face. Ray’s arms left Mikey and he quickly bolted towards the highway again. He pulled him back once more. Mikey collapsed. I stood next to Gerard watching the entire moment fold out. It was heart wrenching to watch Mikey fall so hard. Not physically though, emotionally. Bob ran to help get Mikey into the bus to calm him down while Worm and I were sorely attempting to deal with Gerard’s drunken antics.

“Are you mad at me Frankie?” his voice made me jump back from my thoughts. Am I mad at him? Like fucking hell I am! But I knew that he couldn’t know that.

“No, of course not Gee. I’m scared like shit for you though.” He rested his head in his hands. “You can stop this. I know you can. I have faith in you Gerard.” A pair of footsteps slowly trudged up towards us, Mikey soon standing in the entryway. He kept his eyes on the ground.

“Jamia is trying to call you,” he announced, handing me my phone. I took it and looked at the missed calls. Three in the last two minutes. It started ringing again in my hand and I picked it up.

“Hello?”

“Finally! What took you so long?!” she answered, obviously frustrated.

“I’m sorry babe. I didn’t have my phone on me.”

“Well me and Alicia and Donna are freaking out up here not knowing what’s going on. Christa says it’s bad, but she’s not telling us either!” Poor Christa had walked onto the bus looking for Ray when she found Mikey balling his fucking eyes out. Brian was forcing our crew not to tell anyone what was going on. We all knew this could ruin us.

Though it already had.

“So Hannah doesn’t know anything?” I asked, hopeful. Gerard glanced up at the mention of his daughter’s name.

“No. I’m going to go and stay over with her and Donna for awhile. Donna told me this has something to do with Bert.” I cringed.

“Jamia, everything is really hard to deal with right now. I don’t know if we’re going to be able to continue touring like this.”

“WHAT?!” Gerard jumped up as I mentioned this. “No, we have to keep going!” His sudden outburst caused him to go cross-eyed for a moment as he clutched his head and defeatedly sat back down.

“Bert did something to Gerard didn’t he.” I remained silent, refusing to talk about the subject in the presence of Gerard and Mikey. My phone beeped. I looked at the screen.

“Jamia, Donna is calling me. I love you and I’ll talk to you later,” I said quickly.

“Love you, too. Bye.” I clicked the send button and answered the call.

“Hello?” I spoke almost hesitantly.

“Is someone going to tell me what’s happening to my boys? I heard Mikey was running off into the streets.” Her voice was wavering. I looked over at Gerard.

“Can I talk to her?” he asked. I nodded.

“Gerard wants to talk to you.” She didn’t reply so I just handed the phone over to him.

“Hi mom,” he uttered like a little kid. My eyes shifted to Mikey. He was watching Gerard, his arms crossed over his thin chest and his frame slouched over. Gerard looked up at Mikey. “Ya, he’s fine.” Mikey shook his head feverishly. “Wait, he says he’s not. But I’m fine.” Mikey burst, running straight towards the back lounge. Ray came out of his bunk and followed him. I pulled the phone out of Gerard’s hands, infuriated with him for lying to himself and to his own mother.

“Gerard was drunk last night. Bert took him away and did God knows what to him and put some sort of drug in him and gave him alcohol. The bastard basically undid three years of our lives in less than an hour. He’s going to do something similar to Hannah, I know it.” Gerard’s face was blank. Donna remained silent. A scream escaped the walls of the backroom. “Mikey’s not taking any of this well. I’m pretty sure he’s having a panic attack as we speak,” I stated quite bluntly. A heartbreaking sob broke through the speaker of the phone, indicating that Donna was crying. I looked over at Gerard, his head in his hands.

“I’m so sorry… I’m so….” He reached up for the phone and I gave it to him willingly. “Please, Hannah can’t know. She must never know. She’ll never speak to me again.”

“And what makes you think I won’t?” Donna said, broken sobs stuck in her throat.

“Please. . . . Mama, I need you.” He was lying in the middle of the floor, his hand on his forehead. “I can’t do this alone.”