Everyone Pretends They're Happy

I heard arguing and a few chairs being knocked over as I walked up the stairs. It was no doubt Kennedy and Jared, but I didn’t have time to think about that. I just wanted to clear my mind and think of what I was going to say to Garrett.
I reached our floor and walked over to his bedroom door. I stood outside of it for a few minutes deciding if I should go in or not. I knocked first, realising that was the polite thing to do. I waited for a response, but nothing. I knocked a few more times but there was still nothing.
‘‘Garrett?’’ I asked. I was hoping he wasn’t ignoring me because he was mad at me for not kissing him. I pushed open his door slightly and poked my head around the side. His room was very tidy for a boy. His bed was neatly made, things were propped up nicely on shelves, his desk was actually tidier then mine. His bass was sat in the corner of his room looking a little battered, but Garrett…he was no where.
‘‘Garrett?’’ I asked again. I heard banging from above me then Garrett popped his head down through a square hole in his ceiling.
‘‘Hey, Evie.’’ He mumbled. I gave a wave and swayed from foot to foot. ‘‘You wanna come up?’’ He asked. I nodded and he slid a ladder down for me to climb up. When I reached the top he held out his hand and pulled me up onto the roof of the house. I watched him as he pulled the ladder back up and closed the hole. He took a seat on a blanket that he had previously been on and crossed his legs. He leant back on his hands and looked out at the view. It was amazing to say the least.
It was getting dark so there were a few stars out, street lights were coming on and you could see cars driving in the distance. It was more beautiful than New York to me. It wasn’t as busy and that’s what I liked.
‘‘You can sit, if you want.’’ Garrett piped up, patting a place beside him. I happily sat down and pulled my knees up to my chest.
‘‘Are you mad at me?’’ I asked Garrett. He whipped his head round to face me.
‘‘Of course not! Why would I be?’’ He asked, shocked and confused.
‘‘Just because of earlier. And when I came down before, you left the table. I just thought you didn’t want to see me because you were mad at me.’’ I explained, pulling at the hem of my jacket.
‘‘Evie…’’ he sighed then wrapped an arm around my shoulder. ‘‘I’m not mad at you, I’m mad at myself. I shouldn’t have done that. Its far too soon. I mean, we hardly know each other, you’ve only been living here, what? A month at the most? I don’t even know if you like me, I shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions like that.’’ I nodded and looked up at him.
‘‘I do…’’ I paused for a second, not sure with myself that I was doing the right thing, but it came out anyway, ‘‘I do like you, Garrett. But I cant bring myself to commit to anyone right now. I don’t want to be hurt again. I’m barely over the last boy I let into my life.’’ I told him and his grip around my shoulder tightened.
‘‘I wont hurt you, I promise.’’ He urged. I wanted to believe him so desperately, but I couldn’t.
‘‘Maybe if we get to know each other a bit more, I’ll maybe open myself up to you more.’’ I didn’t know if I was going to follow through with that, but if Garrett made me trust him, it was possible.
‘‘What would you like to know?’’ He beamed, sitting sideways to face me. I mimicked his position and sat in thought for a while.
‘‘Anything, I just want to know about you. I’ll ask you a question if I think of one.’’ I smiled and he nodded.
‘‘Well, I’m Garrett Nickelsen. Twenty years old, I’ve been in The Maine for a good few year now. I have a mom, dad and younger brother. I like ice-cream, soda, fast food…’’ he paused and scratched his head. ‘‘I cant think of anything else.’’ He laughed.
‘‘What about when you’re older, where do you want to be?’’ I asked him, curious if he wanted to be one of these old rock stars.
‘‘I want to be married, have at least two kids. I want to be proud of what I’ve done with my life and still be touring when I’m eighty-five.’’ He grinned. I chuckled at such a random age. ‘‘What about you? Where do you want to be when you’re older?’’ He asked me, curiously.
‘‘Like you, I want to be married and have two kids. I’d love to live in a cottage, I became fascinated with them when I was about five. I love the UK ones most, but I’m sure I’d find one here to make just as homely.’’ I’d never shared this with anyone before, not even my ex. ‘‘I’d love to be a painter or writer. Anything creative, really. Something I could share with my kids.’’ Garrett smiled at me and brushed some of my hair from my face.
‘‘I’m sure that will happen for you one day.’’ He replied.
I was beginning to get more comfortable with Garrett, but my mind wouldn’t let me trust him.
‘‘Would you drive me to college tomorrow? Please?’’ I asked him. I wanted to spend as much time as I could with Garrett. I wanted to be able to trust him.