Gay Guitarist
Thoughts
AIDEN'S P.O.V
Even as I left the park, I felt horrible. Even though what I said was true, it was still a cruel thing to do. To call out on their feelings, to publicly humiliate them in front of two girls they hardly knew, and Theo. I should have at least said it in less cruel terms.
I knew Abigail liked me. That much was brutally clear. I also guessed Parker did. I had been given looks from people since I was 14. I knew the difference between 'I would tap that' interest and a full blown crush. It was no big deal.
What was a big deal was how I felt about it. It was a strange mixture between confusement, disdain, affection and curiosity. That three letter word had passed through my mind more then once, but I always dismissed it. I couldn't be gay, could I?
Another problem was other girls. Mekayla, Rachel. And now Melie. Girls I was breaking, had broken, and were to be broken. And however silly it may sound, I will still stinging from Rachel breaking up with me. Most people would be more upset, but I was just... shocked. And my inflated self-esteem was being questioned. Did people still want me as much as they did?
The band. Reach would go nowhere if I didn't play my cards right. And it wasn't like the rest of the band was any help. No, they expected me to do everything, pay for everything, and know everything about their future. I had gotten us into a party tomorrow night where all the hottest bands would be. All Time Low, 3OH!3, Katy Perry, ect. Even a few of my heroes, like My Chemical Romance and Fall Out Boy would be there. It would be the chance of a life time. And even though they didn't do anything, they would be there to impress the bands, even though I would be the one to sweet talk them.
And last, but not least, was a personal reason. The 6 year anniversary of the death of my mother was approaching. I was 11 when she died in a gas leak at her work. Carbon monoxide poisoning. I tried not to think about it, tried not to think of her at all, but whenever May 2 loomed, I always got more emotional then usual.
Yeah, I was stressed. Emotionally, and physically. And I'm not trying to explain away my actions. I'm just... giving them reason. Trying to explain how unclear my thoughts were, how blinded by my sudden anger I was.
When Melie ran after me, would you believe that I took her home, and slept with her?
Even as I left the park, I felt horrible. Even though what I said was true, it was still a cruel thing to do. To call out on their feelings, to publicly humiliate them in front of two girls they hardly knew, and Theo. I should have at least said it in less cruel terms.
I knew Abigail liked me. That much was brutally clear. I also guessed Parker did. I had been given looks from people since I was 14. I knew the difference between 'I would tap that' interest and a full blown crush. It was no big deal.
What was a big deal was how I felt about it. It was a strange mixture between confusement, disdain, affection and curiosity. That three letter word had passed through my mind more then once, but I always dismissed it. I couldn't be gay, could I?
Another problem was other girls. Mekayla, Rachel. And now Melie. Girls I was breaking, had broken, and were to be broken. And however silly it may sound, I will still stinging from Rachel breaking up with me. Most people would be more upset, but I was just... shocked. And my inflated self-esteem was being questioned. Did people still want me as much as they did?
The band. Reach would go nowhere if I didn't play my cards right. And it wasn't like the rest of the band was any help. No, they expected me to do everything, pay for everything, and know everything about their future. I had gotten us into a party tomorrow night where all the hottest bands would be. All Time Low, 3OH!3, Katy Perry, ect. Even a few of my heroes, like My Chemical Romance and Fall Out Boy would be there. It would be the chance of a life time. And even though they didn't do anything, they would be there to impress the bands, even though I would be the one to sweet talk them.
And last, but not least, was a personal reason. The 6 year anniversary of the death of my mother was approaching. I was 11 when she died in a gas leak at her work. Carbon monoxide poisoning. I tried not to think about it, tried not to think of her at all, but whenever May 2 loomed, I always got more emotional then usual.
Yeah, I was stressed. Emotionally, and physically. And I'm not trying to explain away my actions. I'm just... giving them reason. Trying to explain how unclear my thoughts were, how blinded by my sudden anger I was.
When Melie ran after me, would you believe that I took her home, and slept with her?
♠ ♠ ♠
Blah, blah, blah.This was just a look into Aiden's thoughts. 8)
& he's such a hoooe. Sleepin' with poor little Melie. >___>
Anyways. Do you realize...
that in 4 comments, the comments hit 50?!
Shocking, right? ;)