Was I The Only One?

“When’s your next shoot?”

I thought for a moment, “I have my Ellie Saab spring collection shoot tomorrow.”

“I want to go.” He pouted. “Do you think they’d let me out?”

I shrugged, “Depends if you’re well enough.”

Joe smirked and kissed my ear, “I’ll be out of here tomorrow.”

I chuckled at his determination. I didn’t even know if he would be allowed on set, but I’m sure his name would get him on set without any complaints from anyone. But he wasn’t getting on that set if he wasn’t fully healed. There was no way he was going to strain himself just to watch me model.

While he played with my hair I debated our future; we were back together and it wasn’t awkward for us but it could be awkward for our families. Or it could not be. Nick was the one I was most worried about, his acceptance of our relationship would be key or else it would be so hard to keep it together. And what would we do about the status of our relationship with the media and his fans? I didn’t like lying to people. I’d want them to know what was going on. There was nothing worse than having to hide a relationship that you wanted to shout to the whole world. I had no shame in being with Joe, I was very proud to be someone that special in his life. It would be a shame to hide it.

I got a text from Joe’s dad telling me they’d be here soon so I slyly slipped off Joe’s bed and sat down on the sofa chair pretending to be interested in my cell phone while Joe talked about random things that popped into his mind.

When they came I didn’t get to talk to Joe much, so I just excused myself and decided to go to grab some lunch with Miley.

I got to my car after flashing a smile at the paparazzi across the street. The sun was shining so as I waited for my roof to go down I slipped ‘I am…’ in and turned up the music as ‘Single Ladies’ blasted through my speakers. I browsed my twitter timeline and smiled as I saw Joe had tweeted, but he had done it while I was there. I didn’t even notice him take the picture or tweet it so I assume someone else had done it for him.

Juliharrr Just been to see Joe, going for lunch and then home to see my kitten/cat.

Just as I started the car my blackberry buzzed on the seat next to me, I reached over to see a text from Joe had arrive.

Can I tell them? x

I sighed, at least I wouldn’t be there to see their reactions. He could deal with it all. Sucks to be him.

Go ahead. Knock yourself out lover boy x

I tossed my phone back onto the seat then took off driving towards Tart. I spotted the paparazzi as soon as I got on the street and they sniffed me out just as quickly. I parked just outside of the restaurant then sat in my car waiting for the roof to go up while paparazzi snapped from the front and side windows of my car.

I grabbed my purse and cell then got out of the car.

I ignored the questions they shouted to me and entered the restaurant with haste. I spotted Miley and was surprised to see she had brought Liam along with her; Liam was her current boyfriend and co-star, they were a cute couple.

I sat down after giving them both a hug and smiled.

“So, what’s happening with Joe? We’re going to go see him after this.” Miley started the conversation.

“He’s doing good, the pain isn’t too bad anymore.” I replied, “Oh, I have to tell you something.”

“Well?” She grinned excitedly.

“Well, before he went into surgery I was just thinking how this was like, a realisation. He could’ve died thinking that I didn’t love him or thinking that I was angry with him. It all just made me realise how much I really do want to be with him. So we’re giving it another try.”

Miley squeaked loudly, catching the attention of the people around us. Liam placed his hand over his face and groaned with a smile. “Oh my gosh! That’s freakin’ amazing!”

“He knows his place, I’m watching him like a hawk.” I pointed out.

“So you should.” Liam’s Australian accent bellowed. “He needs a good knee to the nuts.”

I chuckled and shook my head. “Oh, and!” I exclaimed making them jump. “I looked after his house last night and went to steal one of his t-shirts and found a tiffany box in one of the pockets.” Both their jaws dropped to the floor.

“Was it an engagement ring?” Miley whispered, aware of prying people around us.

“I didn’t look.” They both frowned in unison making me want to giggle. “The bottom of the box had specifications on and it said ‘promise ring.’ The date said it arrived just before we broke up.”

“Aw, that’s depressing. He kept it all that time.” Liam said.

“I know right?” I mused.

We chatted for about another half an hour before going our separate ways. I drove towards my own home and felt an aching in my stomach when I saw it, I felt like I hadn’t been to my own home for a long time. Everything was the same though, it was welcoming; it was home.

When I entered the house Muffins charged down the stairs to my feet, meowing at me. I picked him up and carried him into the kitchen where I put out some food for him to eat, he seemed quite hungry but then again he was never one to turn down food. But apparently, in our fridge food wasn’t an option; we had nothing inside. I just stared into the empty fridge for a few minutes before concluding no food would magically appear then went to look in the cupboards and found nothing of interesting.

For some reason I decided to check the fridge again, y’know just in case some food had appeared. It hadn’t.

I strolled up to my bedroom and sighed at the loving sight. I spotted my acoustic guitar and camera in the corner of my room with my tripod resting against the wall. I hadn’t written a song in a while or done a YouTube video, so I decided that would be my task.

I sat down on my bed and a song flowed out of me so easily.

“You by the light is the greatest of finds,
In a world full of wrong you’re the thing that’s right.
Finally made it through the lonely to the other side.

You said it again my hearts in motion, every word feels like shooting star.
I’m at the edge of my emotions, watching the shadows burning in the dark.
And I… I’m in love.
And I… I’m terrified.
For the first time and the last time in my only life…

And this could be good it’s already better than that.
And nothing’s worse than knowing you’re holding back.
I could be all that you needed if you let me try.

You said it again my hearts in motion, every word feels like shooting star.
I’m at the edge of my emotions, watching the shadows burning in the dark.
And I… I’m in love.
And I… I’m terrified.
For the first time and the last time in my only life…

I only said it ‘cause I mean it.
And I only mean it because it’s the truth.
And don’t you doubt what I’ve been dreaming.
Because it fills me up and holds me close whenever I’m without you.

You said it again my hearts in motion, every word feels like shooting star.
I’m at the edge of my emotions, watching the shadows burning in the dark.
And I… I’m in love.
And I… I’m terrified.
For the first time and the last time in my only life…”

Once I’d written it and played it a few times, I was overjoyed with the results. I set up the camera on the tripod in front of my bed then set it to record.

“Hey guys, long time no see. I’ve been busy but I have the day off so I’m at home and I literally just wrote this song a couple of minutes ago and I really like it. It’s called ‘terrified’ and it’s about when you’re totally in love with someone who means so much to you, but it terrifies you and it’s about knowing that everything will be fine in the end. So… here goes.”

I played the song again, luckily for me I didn’t mess up so I wouldn’t have to redo it. I took my camera and sat down on my bed with my laptop and began to edit it, cutting out the pauses at the start and end and also the pause between when I stopped talking and started the song. While it uploaded on to YouTube I took a quick shower and changed into some three quarter length jeans and a grey vest.

When I had dried my hair and re applied some make up the video was uploaded and I took to twitter. I saw that Emma had just tweeted.

emmarection I have 3 wardrobes yet there is nothing to wear. I need my whore features wardrobe.

Juliharrr @emmarection Oh stfu turd breath, you’re not getting near my clothes. You already have half of my stuff!

emmarection @Juliharrr …you can prove nothing.

I rolled my eyes and set to cleaning my room… that would take a while.