No Place in My Heart for a Criminal Like You

Before the next session had a chance to begin, I got a call from Gordon. I sat in my office chair, telephone pressed to my ear as the nurses prepared The Joker for his session.

“What’s the problem, Gordon?” I asked into the phone.

“I just called to check up on your progress with The Joker,” he replied.

“Slow. Slow, but steady.”

The nurses left the room, leaving The Joker sitting in the chair and I noted that his hands were cuffed. He stared intently at me, in anticipation of me to end the phone call. His leg shook frantically already bored of waiting.

There was a long pause before Gordon spoke again. Then I heard him sigh, “Dr Quinzel, are you sure you’re comfortable with these sessions with him? I know what he can be like and it’s not pleasant. And I say this without disrespect, but I don’t think a young girl, like you, can handle this kind of patient.”

“I’m fine. Trust me. I don’t need to be judged. I assure you that I can do this; I don’t need to be treat like a child, as if I can’t cope. And if this fails…then that’s my fault. Oh, and please call me Harleen.” I noticed The Joker crack a smile when I said this, so I shot him a confused glance.

“Ok, ok. I’ll let you get back to whatever it is that you are doing. Take care…Harleen.”

I said my goodbyes, before hanging up the phone. I looked back up at The Joker and noticed he was still grinning. “What are you smiling at?” I asked.

“Oh, nothing…Harleen,” he replied, extending and putting emphasis on my name. The way he said my name sent shivers down my spine.

“Please, Dr Quinzel,” I corrected. “Let’s keep this professional.”

“Professional? I think that had gone astray in the first five minutes of our first session together, puddin’.” He almost let out a laugh, but instead looked me up and down as if I was some sort of inanimate object. “Harleen Quinzel…I like that.”

“And why’s that?”

“Don’t you see the pun? Harley Quinn. Harlequin as in the jester?” I had never noticed that until now. I shook the thoughts of my head abruptly.

“This is completely off topic, Joker. Please, can we get back to our session.”

“You were the one asking the questions, toots. It is your job after all,” The Joker said smarmily.

“Fair enough. Anyway, just for analysis, how do you think these sessions are progressing?”

“Terrible,” he replied, blatantly. I was slightly taken aback by his immediate answer. I didn’t think they were going too bad. “That’s my opinion. You see, I think that a person like me cannot be cured. I’m not sure what you think, but I don’t see any progress being made at all. These sessions are only time fillers to keep me occupied throughout the week. And for you, it’s just an excuse to see me. You’ve already explained your feelings towards me.”

“Is it me being your psychiatrist the reason behind the lack of progress in the sessions?”

“No…no. No, not at all. I’m not blaming anyone. All I’m saying is that I don’t think I’m curable. I don’t see how you would think you’d be able to change me. How do you turn a killer into a good man? As the saying goes, you can’t teach an old dog new tricks.”

He winked with a click of his mouth after his little speech. I couldn’t help but feel a little surprised when I noticed that he hadn’t moved from his seat yet. But the main thing on my mind was that he had just made me feel more determined. I now felt even more focused on the fact that it was my duty to cure him and I wouldn’t stop until he was a sane man. Obviously, it would take years. These things don’t happen over night.

“I’ve helped patients before. What makes you think that I can’t help you?”

“I’m stronger than you. Physically and mentally. I know a lot more about you, than you know about me. Trust me.”

”Well, if you think these session aren’t progressing, then why do you think we should continue?”

“You’re a good sport and I like you. Even if I didn’t want these sessions, you wouldn’t let me go. I can tell how…‘persistent’ you are with these sessions. You’re not the kind of person who gives up easily. You may be weaker than me, but you’re not that weak. And I do recall you saying that you’re obsessed with me.”

The Joker grinned at me smugly. I knew that saying that would come back to bite me. I tried to regain my character by correcting, attempting to make him think otherwise. “Don’t twist my words; I didn’t say that I was obsessed with you. I’m obsessed with this case and this case only. Why would I admit to being obsessed with you? How obscene. What would make you think that?” I had failed in any form of persuasion. I wanted to stop speaking earlier, but I couldn’t. Now I had just dug a bigger whole for myself.

He laughed at me, how I was stumbling over my words. “That isn’t what you said last session, puddin’. And I’m not trying to twist your words.”

“Let’s get back on track, shall we?” I questioned, trying to turn the attention away from my blushing cheeks. “Now that you know my name, could you kindly tell me yours? Your real one that is. Not anything like The Joker or Mr J or…Clown Prince of Evil.”

“Mr J…I like that,” he said deep in thought, actually contemplating the name. “Well if you must know what my real name is, it’s Joe.”

“Jo-” I stopped when I noticed his lips curve into a smile. I knew then that it was a silly joke of his and I couldn’t help but let out a little giggle. “Very funny, Mr J. Your surname wouldn’t happen to be Ker, huh?”

“Well done, my little Harley Quinn. You’re a smart one,” he patronised me as he pointed a finger at me, while I continued to giggle. “You know, you should laugh more often. It brings out the beautiful side to you more. I don’t like the…serious side. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.”

I liked this side to The Joker. I had never witnessed it before and I was happy that I was talking to him like a friend without any awkwardness. Even though I wasn’t progressing well, I enjoyed his company. I stood up from my chair and began to walk over towards him. “I appreciate that you haven’t attempted to threaten or intimidate me yet,” I told him after I had sat down next to him.

“Would you like me to harass you?” He asked jokingly, but there was also a hint of seriousness in it.

“No, no. I like this side to you,” I replied.

I hadn’t noticed that he was slowly getting closer and closer to me, but for some strange reason I was drawn closer too. “Hmm?” He murmured quietly, continuing to come closer.

“I like this side to you.”

“Mhmm,” he sighed before letting his lips touch mine and I couldn’t help but kiss back. He had seduced and charmed me and I couldn’t fight the urge to hold back anymore. I craved his touch and I knew how much this would get me into trouble, but that only added to the want of this kiss. I gently placed my hands on either side of his face, when the kiss deepened and I could faintly feel his scars touching my palms.

As I was about to bring my body closer to his, I heard the door handle jiggle slightly and I immediately broke away from the kiss and jumped up from the chair. I turned to face away from the door so that whoever had just entered couldn’t see the white and red make-up smeared across my face. “Dr Quinzel? Is everything alright? This session has been going on longer than usual. Do you think it’s time we take Patient 4479 back to his cell?”

I attempted to wipe away the make-up on my face as I replied with, “Yes, yes. Take him back. And next time, please knock.”

“Sorry, Dr Quinzel.”

I didn’t face the nurses at all, the whole time they were strapping him back up. I didn’t want to risk getting caught with his make-up on my face. There was a guilty look upon my face as The Joker got dragged away. Yet again, I felt disgusted with myself, even more so than before. He did the usual wink as I continued to wipe away make-up and feel disgusted.

Once he had disappeared I closed my office door. I looked down at my hands and noticed there was paint all over them. I rolled my eyes in irritation and rubbed them on my legs under my skirt. Hopefully no-one would notice. I then tried erasing all thoughts of what just happened and typed up the very little progress.

Later that night, I decided to take a little trip to The Joker’s cell. I felt as if the session needed to end properly as it hadn’t ended as expected earlier on. I opened the slide on the small window of the door and peered through. The Joker lay on his bed in his straitjacket on his back. It looked like he was asleep, so I didn’t want to bother him. I was about to turn around and leave but I noticed him move slightly. He was looking down his nose at me. When he realised it was me, he got up from his bed and walked towards the door, so I could only see his eyes.

“Can I help you?” He asked, with a confused expression.

“I just wanted to clarify that what just happened was only because I got caught in the moment.”

He rolled his eyes at me. “Mhmm.”

“Yes. Can I just ask why you kissed me? Aren’t psychopaths supposed to show no human emotions or empathy towards any other human being?”

“Psychopaths also use charm, manipulation, intimidation, sex and violence to control others and to satisfy their own selfish needs. Look it up, puddin’.” I looked at him disgusted before he continued. “You’re gonna be a good help to me when we get out of here, toots.”

“Who said you were getting out? You’re not getting out of here anytime soon.”

He stared at me almost looking sad, but he also had confusion and determination in his eyes. He nodded before saying, “We’ll see…Harley Quinn.”