You've Got to Hide Your Love Away

“Ava, A-va, Aaaavaaaa-” Dylan sang, bounding up the stairs and into the bus. He stopped to do a couple of moves he must have learned from the fucking Nutcracker in front of her.

“What?” She didn't have the patience for Dylan and his interpretive dances right now.

He stopped and hopped next to her on the couch, sending it rocking against the wall. “We're going out tonight.”

“Who's we? You and me? Cause the last time I took you around New York City we woke up in the shadiest half-way house I've ever seen with CATS ticket stubs in our pockets and the worst hangovers we'd had since the last frat party we went to.”

“That was only because you took me to that punk bar where someone probably put fucking roofies in our drinks!” He threw he arms up into the air and stomped on the ground, getting rather heated. Ava ignored his tantrum.

“Dylan, no matter how drugged I was, it would not be my idea to charge to orchestra tickets to a fucking musical where people run around in footie pajamas and face paint on my credit card. That was all you and your secret little theatre boy that lurks within and shows up when you get a couple of drinks in your system.”

“Whatever, that's totally beside the point. And no, not just you and me. I meant 'we' as in everybody.”

“Everybody?” Ava threw her head back onto the couch and groaned. Mike and Tre were sending her glares like they she was the freaky goth girl at the cheerleader table and she really wasn't in the mood for any high school bullshit tonight.

“Ava! New York is your city! And we have hotel rooms tonight! No more busing it!”

She dropped her magazine. “No shit?"

“No fucking shit. So go get your face on and pick out one of those skirts that makes every single guy in the entire fucking bar look at your ass so that we can go. We'll be there in half an hour.”

“You're lucky I love this city, Dylan.”

“Girl, please, you're lucky I love you.”

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An hour later Ava was standing in front of the full length mirror she'd propped up in the sliver of free space she'd managed to procure. She scrutinized the outfit, turning left than right and pursing her lips. She was wearing black, short boots with black, patterned tights and a tight black skirt lined with silver zippers. Her top was thin and gray, showing off the outlines of the lacy black bra underneath. Her eye make-up was thick, green eyes rimmed with dark kohl and smoky eyeshadow. Something was missing.

“A-ha!” She reached into her bag with sudden realization and pulled out a studded belt, linking it through the belt loops and clinching it tight. She grabbed her leather jacket and swung it over her shoulder. Next she went for her old leather purse, worn and fading on the edges and littered with Rolling Stones and Ramones patches.

The whole thing looked a little over the top and slutty.

She looked good.

“Ava! Come on! We're all fucking waiting!”

Andy, of course.

Good, now she could really make an entrance. She knew she was a bit of an attention whore, but hell, she was a lead singer, it was a very self serving position, what did people expect from her?

And she could watch Billie's eyes as he took the outfit in.

Not that she was dressed for his benefit, or anyone's, for that matter.

She turned and walked down the stairs into the alleyway the buses had managed to park in.

“Finally!” Mike sighed, shaking his head as she emerged.

She rolled her eyes, hands on her hips. Way to spoil the entry. She dared to glance at Billie. He was watching her silently. His eyes anywhere but her face.

That was always a good sign.

“Whatever, lets go. I shoulda been drunk by now.” Tre turned on his heel and walked towards the nearest street. Ava could tell he was angry by the set of his shoulders.

She wondered what the hell had crawled up his ass and died.

“Seems like you've been pushing some buttons lately.” Danielle fell into step beside her, brushing her blonde bangs back from her face and watching Tre storm off.

“It would appear so.”

“What the fuck did you do to piss of the most fun, easy going weird fuck drummer in rock and roll?”

“I've been trying to figure that one out for myself.”

“Couldn't be the fact that you're shagging his best friend, now could it?”

Ava's eyes grew and Danielle laughed outright. Panic was an emotion that Ava rarely wore.

“How did you know about that?” She asked in an urgent, hushed whisper that seemed to carry more than a normal volume would.

“Pa-lease, girlfran. The lingering glances and slutty skirt and oh yeah, I believe I saw you mouthing 'I want to fuck you' to him the other day from across the room.”

“Dammit, Danielle!” Ava pushed her by the shoulders, hard. The blonde laughed again, nearly doubling over and clutching her side as the two received some odd looks from the rest of the group passing by. Billie's eyes stayed on the pair for an exceptionally long moment. “Stop! No one else can know about this!” She said when the group had passed.

“Aw, cute. Why the fuck not?” She said when she regained her posture.

“Because,” Ava sighed, running a hand through her hair. “Because I don't know what this is, and right now, I don't wanna know. Things are good, and I always fuck up good.” Ava was feeling sorry for herself. She didn't like the way it sounded, and Danielle wasn't in the mood to play Freud and uncode all of Ava's emotion baggage.

So she nodded. “Okay, fine. We can keep this on the down low, but you're gonna have to try harder too.”

“How?”

Danielle sighed, shaking her head. Sometimes, Ava could be really clueless about obvious social customs. “Like concealing your coming and goings, not having little private meetings hourly, and maybe not starring all the fucking time.”

“Can I still stare sometimes?” She joked, linking arms with Danielle and dragging her towards the group.

“God, Ava. You're playing with fire here.”

“I know.” She grinned wolfishly, as they rounded the corner and walked in the bar.

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The music was loud inside the bar, the kind of loud that makes your head feel like its being pounded against a wall until your ears finally managed to blow out as some sort of self preservation technique.

Ava was sitting at the bar with a rum and coke. Andy had been sitting with her until he'd spotted a dark haired girl with a cut off denim skirt and tramp stamp that screamed fuck-me-now-I'm-easy had sauntered by and caught his attention. When she'd shot him a scrutinizing look he'd held up his key card and grinned, hotel room.

Ava understood. She'd probably be horny by now if she wasn't getting any regularly either.

Ava saw a figure move to fill Andy's recently vacated seat out of the corner of her eye. She turned to get a better look and saw Billie smiling at her.

“Can I buy you a drink?” She read his lips over the blaring music. Something metal and screeching. Who the hell picked this joint anyway?

“That would be lovely.” She shouted back, holding up her recently emptied glass. She thought briefly about Danielle's warnings to stay away from Billie in public as he motioned for the bartender over. Too late.

With a refilled rum and coke in hand Ava swiveled on the bar stool to face him better.

“To what do I owe the pleasure of free alcohol?” She smirked, raising her glass to toast.

He mirrored her expression and clinked her glass, drinking then setting it down on the table with enough force to make a noise within the loud bar. Then he looked down to retrieve something from his pocket. He held out a piece of paper with the number 407 written in his messy scrawl. She raised her eyebrows.

“I figure my room's probably just a bit nicer than yours. You wanna stay there tonight?”

“Such a gentleman!” She gushed rubbing his leg. “But where will you stay?” She batted her eyelashes and pouted.

He rolled his eyes and picked up his drink.

“Oh, you want me to come stay with you? Are we going to watch some movies?”

“Something like that.” He answered, then looked away. “Nice get-up.” He smirked. He must have already given her the once over outside.

“What? This old thing? I thought you might like it.” She took an uninterested sip of her drink now.

“You were right.” He answered, his voice dropping. He wondered if she'd heard him, then saw a sparkle in her eye as confirmation.

“God, you men are pigs. Mini skirts get you guys every time.”

“Guilty.” He answered after he'd openly appraised her legs a second time. She looked at him out of the corner of her eye, and both of them grinned when his eyes met hers.

“I'm gonna leave my door unlocked tonight.” He said, leaning in. “I'll see you there, hopefully without the mini skirt.” He pulled a few bills from his pocket and threw them on the bar, winked at her conspiratorially, and walked off.
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Ava and Danielle managed to make it back to the hotel around 1. Although not terribly intoxicated, they still took great pleasure in ogling over the gold crown molding and elevator attendants wearing in suits. Neither one of them had stayed in anything nicer than a Holiday Inn before.

When they finally arrived at their room and opened the door Danielle made a bee-line for the bed, jumping onto it.

Ava laughed and went for her bag.

“This, is fucking awesome.” Danielle stated, face first into the mattress.

“Yeah, hate to break it to you, but I don't think I'm gonna be staying long.” Ava unzipped the suitcase and started to dig through the contents.

“Oh really? Where are you off to?” Danielle rolled over and pushed herself up on her elbows to watch.

“Room 407, I believe.” Ava took the wrinkled paper from her pocket to confirm it.

“A-va, you're gonna make me watch all the pay per view films alone? I was gonna order a shit load of room service for us!”

“'Fraid so.” She pulled out a toothbrush victoriously and went to the adjacent bathroom.

“Damn, girl. So much for keeping a low profile.”

“I can be stealthy.” Ava argued around a mouthful of toothpaste.

“I hope so.”

She spit into the sink. “I can.” She protested, then she was back in the room fishing through her bag again. She pulled out a a long sleeved man's shirt and started to undress.

“You're going over in that?” Danielle asked in disbelief.

“Yeah, why?” Ava didn't stop to rethink her ensemble.

“Ava, walking down the hall without pants isn't keeping a low profile. I think it might actually be considered public indecency.”

“What am I supposed to wear, this?” She gestured to her tights and skirt and smeared eye make-up. “I look like a fucking escort service wandering through hotel hallways at 1 AM.”

“Okay, fine, don't take my advice. You never do.” She let out a breath and flopped back down onto the comforter.

“Aw, Dan.” Ava cooed as buttoned up the shirt and moved to sit next to the her friend on the bed. “I do like your advice, I'm just-”

“A hard-headed dumb bitch?”

“Exactly. Now I'm gonna head down the hall. I'll see you when I sneak back in late tonight or early tomorrow morning, okay?”

Danielle grinned, and Ava was glad. It wasn't easy to piss her best friend off, and she hated it every time. “Okay, you groupie, go fuck your rock star.”

“Thanks.” Ava was up and across the room in a few seconds, closing the door behind her once she'd checked to make sure the hallway was clear. She dashed to Billie's room, turning the knob slowly. It was unlocked. She slipped through the opening and closed and locked it behind her.

“Hey, pretty.” He looked up when he heard the door close. He had his acoustic guitar across his lap, sitting on the couch.

“Hey,” She smiled as she walked over and sat next to him. She was getting better at being close to him. “Writing?”

He nodded, then put his guitar down. “I was just finishing something up while I waited for you. Planning on keeping me waiting for a long time?”

“Gotta keep you on your toes.” She grinned.

“You tend to do that without much effort.” He picked up her feet with his free hands and swung them across his lap so she was laying down. He ran his hands up her bare legs, picking one up and bending it at the knee so that it rested flat against his leg. He looked to her face and she grinned a chesire grin, biting her lip.

He moved so that he was laying on top of her, supporting himself with a hand on either side of her face.

“Hi.” He said, licking her nose, quick.

“Hi,” She laughed back.

He leant down, eyes watching hers as they flickered to his lips, then back to meet his. She licked her lips furtively right before they met his. His lips were soft, but insistent. She moaned lightly into the kiss, taking one leg and wrapping it around his waist.

His hands moved to her waist, bunching up that long shirt. He pulled away from her lips to work on the buttons. Ava's head fell back on the arm of the couch as her breathing grew rapid and shallow. His fingers played with any skin they could as he worked the shirt off her.

When his fingers were just seizing the last button, a loud pounding on the door caused the both of the to jump and look towards it like the sight of the door might give them answers. Billie waited, and the knock came again.

“Billie! I know you're in there, open the damn door.” Mike.

“Fuck,” He breathed lightly, jumping off of Ava.

She cursed herself inwardly for being stupid enough to come here. Danielle had been right, again.

Billie moved to pace near the door as Ava sat up, righting the shirt and re-doing the buttons.

“What do I do?” She whispered frantically.

He stopped and brought a hand to his head, surveying the suite. “Hide,” He answered.

Ava jumped up and looked around before heading into the bedroom and taking a seat on the other side of the wall. As she crouched down she realized how fucking ridiculous the whole thing was. She felt like a teenager hiding when some boy's mom came upstairs to collect his laundry.

Billie cursed as he moved to open the door.

“The fuck, Bill? What the hell were you doing in here?”

“Nice to see you, too, Mike.” He answered angrily. “I must've fallen asleep. It's almost 2, you know.”

“I knew you'd be up writing or something.” Mike gestured to the guitar and notebook on the floor by the couch.

“What do you want, Mike?”

“I saw you and Ava by the bar today. You ordered her a drink?” Mike's voice was casual as he went to the fridge to grab a beer. He twisted the cap off and leaned against the counter.

Ava's ear perked up at the sound of her name. She leaned against the wall as if it might help her to hear the conversation.

“Mike, we've already been over this. If that's what you came here to tell me, get the fuck out so I can go back to sleep.”

Mike stared at Billie for a long three seconds. Billie had to avert his eyes.

“She's here, isn't she?”

“What? No! I-”

“Bill, I can tell from the fucking look on your face.” Mike threw his beer in the sink and the bottle shattered. He stormed towards the door.

“Mike, stop, she's not even here!” Billie chased him, throwing his hands up. Ava could imagine the gesture based on his tone.

Mike turned to face him in the open doorway. “Billie, I already talked to you about this. I'm not dealing with this shit anymore. Whatever you fuck up, is on you.” He pulled the door shut behind him without another word.

Billie sat on the couch and dropped his head into his hands, cursing. When he looked up again, he saw Ava in the bedroom doorway, leaning against the doorjam. He looked at her apologetically.

The silence in the room was deafening as she stared at him.

“Guess he killed the mood, huh?” Billie asked, trying to force a nervous laugh.

Her expression didn't falter. “Billie, what's going on?”

He didn't answer, biding his time.

“Your friends hate me, like really fucking hate me. Not just 'oh, Billie's banging a slut' hate me.”

“Ava, it's not your fault, or you. It's me. He has a problem with me right now so he's taking it out on you. And you're not a slut.”

“The rest of the world begs to differ.”

He thought about telling her, her really did. But the sight of her already looking wounded in the doorway made him lie to save her from getting hurt. That got him every time.

"Fuck the rest of the world, Ava. And fuck Mike and Tre. I like you, and I don't care what they think." She wasn't about to accept that for an answer. He sighed, changing his tone. "He just, he worries about me, I guess. About my reputation and relationships. He doesn't want anything to get out of control and all crazy. If I fuck up, its bound to fuck up the band, and we've all worked too fucking hard for that.”

“What does he think I'm gonna do, boil your rabbit?”

Billie laughed in spite of himself. “I dunno. But he does seem to think you're the fatal attraction type.”

“I think I'm going to take that as a compliment.” She said after a moment of thoughtful consideration.

“Most people wouldn't.”

She shrugged. “I'm not crazy, Billie.” He stared at her. “I know people think so, but I'm not stalker girl, or obsessive girl, or crazy angry PMS mood-swing bitch. I'm just, me."

“I know,” He said, grinning a smile that failed to reach his eyes. “I've always known, since I first saw you that day, Ava, I knew who you were.”

She pulled herself out of the doorway and walked closer to him.

“Oh yeah? What did you know about me?” She stopped in front of him, hands on her hips.

“I knew that you were special.”

He put his hands on her waist, pulling her into his lap, their eyes locking as she lowered her face to his. She took her hands and framed his face in them.

“I knew you weren't an idiot." He laughed and captured her lips in a kiss, silencing further conversation.