Lets Just Pretend

Is it wrong for me to still be worried? Is it ok for me to say that I’m still scared that Jason might betray me before? I hope it is…because there’s some small part of me that still thinks he could easily break my heart and not care that he did it.

I stared up at his sleeping face. His hair was messy, pointing up at odd angles and hiding his face. His chest rose and fell softly…even after last night though, I feel like he could betray me again and I felt bad for feeling that way.

Maybe I’m just over thinking all this? Jason apologized, he tried to get me back, not the other way around…so doesn’t that mean that he won’t do it again?No.

Sighing, I pull out of his arms. Jason groaned and for a moment I thought he was going to wake up, but luckily enough he didn’t. Instead he clutched onto the nearest pillow and pulled it to his chest.

I rolled my eyes; he’s always been a cuddler.

I jumped out of bed and searched my room for some clean clothes. Once I threw a pair on I called Mandy and I wrote a note to Jason saying that Mandy and I were going to the café and I’d be back later. I left afterwards and met up with her.

“So what’s on your mind?” She asks, taking a bite out of her doughnut.

“Jason,” I answer with a sigh. I rest my elbow on the table and use it to prop my head up. “Do you…really think he likes me?”

“No, I’m pretty sure he loves you.”

“I’m being serious.”

Mandy looked away from her food to focus her attention on me. The girl gave me a sympathetic smile while she asks, “You still thinking about that?”

I didn’t have to answer, she already knew.

“B, it’s in the past. I’m sure he won’t be stupid enough to do it again,” she reassures me, reaching open to grab my hand and squeeze it in hers.

Biting my bottom lip, I glare at my coffee as if it were my problem. “But…how do you know? We both thought he cared before…”

“And he did care, he was just scared. Now he has no reason to do that to you.”

“What if he gets a reason?”

“You’re such a worry wart,” Mandy laughs, slapping my arm lightly before taking a drink of her coffee. “What does he have to do to make you believe he won’t betray you again?”

“I don’t know,” I sigh, this was really bugging me. I do have the right to worry though…right? “I just…need proof or something.”

“Then set him up.”

Shocked, I look at Mandy with curious eyes. “Say what woman?”

“Set him up…you know…put him in a tough situation where he has to chose you over something else,” Mandy explains with devious grin. “That way you’ll know that Jay is crazy about you and I won’t have to listen to you bitch about it.”

“Fuck you.”

“I love you too princess.”

~

“I’m not so sure if I want to do this,” I grumble, biting away at my nails.

Mandy swats my hand away and growls, “Well it’s too late now.”

“What if…what if he chooses her over me?”

“Then he’s no good for you and he’s psychotic cuz she’s a bitch.”

Laughing, I nod in agreement and continue walking towards my apartment with Mandy by my side. A couple days ago Mandy and I put her idea of setting Jason up into motion. The two of us went to talk to Kenley, at first she wanted nothing to do with either of us, but eventually we talked her into it.

The plan was simple.

Kenley is supposed to come to my apartment and try to get Jason back by any means necessary. Jason won’t know that I’ll be there, seeing and hearing everything.

That way I will know for sure if Jason will stick to me and only me.

I know you all probably think that I shouldn’t do this and that I’m a bitch for doing so, but if you haven’t realized it yet I am a bitch. Get over it.

Mandy and I stopped in front of my apartment. I could hear Kenley inside, “You know he’s no good for you. He’s just some faggot.”

I opened the door as quietly as possible. The two of us tip toed inside and positioned ourselves close to the wall so we could peak into my living room to see Jason.

“No he isn’t!” Jason protested. “He’s my boyfriend and best friend I love him.”

Mandy wiggled her eyebrows at me and I punched her in the side before going back to listening.

“Do you really?” Kenley asks, moving far too close to Jason. Oh, she was acting too well…if she wasn’t helping me out I’d kill her after this…

One of her arms wrapped around his neck while the other rested comfortably on his thigh. Jason’s eyes were the size of saucers when she leaned up to press her lips to his. Again, if she wasn’t helping me I would kill her!

I glanced at Mandy who was currently trying not to burst out laughing. I flicked her the bird and made a mental note to kill her later for finding this hilarious. What kind of friend is she!

Jason pushed Kenley away fast. She stumbled backwards, but easily regained her balance. Everyone was silent as they waited for what Jason had to say.

“Yes, I really do love him. I love him more then anything and I always have! I messed up once by giving him up for something stupid like popularity and there’s no way in hell I’ll do that again.”

And that was when Mandy ruined everything by squealing like a high school girl. “You guys are so cute!”

My eye twitched as she bolted past me to tackle Jason to the ground. Saying he was shocked would be an understatement.

“W-What’s…g-going on?” He screeched, trying to rip Mandy’s arms off him but she wasn’t budging.

“Thanks Kenley,” I say, appearing from behind the wall. The girl shrugs her shoulders before waving good-bye and walking out the door to leave a very stunned Jason on the floor.

“B…what’s going on?” Jay finally got Mandy off, but she was still giggling insanely behind him.

“Sorry,” I apologize with a soft smile. “I just…was worried you might hurt me again so…Mandy and I kind of just set you up.”

“You couldn’t have just believed me!” Jason shouted, a hurt expression on his face.

“No…but now I can,” I laugh, moving over to wrap my arms around his neck and lean up to kiss his pouting lips.

“I love you so much Brandon,” Jason smiled.

“I love you too.”

And Mandy squealed again…