A Friend Like Me

And if I start a commotion,
I run the risk of losing you
And that's worse.
Ever Fallen In Love With Someone (You Shouldn't've Fallen In Love With) - Buzzcocks

Friday.

It was nearly a week since I had last spoken to Joe and let me tell you, it dragged by.

It was the longest week of my life. I realized what life without Joe was like, even though it was for just one week. It felt empty and boring – the guy who could never fail to make me laugh was missing.

See, I've never gone more than a day or two without speaking to Joe. Even when he'd be out touring, he'd always make time for me, making sure that he texted or talked to me on iChat or on the phone at least twice a day.

It was time to swallow my pride, I decided. He'd be going to Europe tomorrow and I didn't want him to leave without a goodbye for me or whatever.

I was opening the door to my apartment building when someone tapped me on the shoulder. Looking back, I saw Joe, shifting his weight foot to foot nervously. I noticed that Joe's hair was shorter – way shorter.

“Hey,” Joe said uneasily.

“Hi,” I stated, walking into my apartment building, followed by Joe.

Joe smiled slightly when I answered. “You're going to Europe with us. Me and a couple of the people in my team went to go see your principal or whatever and he gave me this list of things you need to do or whatever. Anyways, it was really, really hard to convince that guy.”

I gaped at him.

Did he really convince my dean?

“We're going on a private jet in a few hours, because I need to drop in to L.A. first and grab a couple of things. Then, we'll go to Europe the next day, but we'll have to go on a different plane, because everyone else is flying from here.”

“Private jet?” I echoed, still stuck on the part where he actually convinced my dean. Then, it all settled in. “Joe! A private jet?! Honestly, do the words 'global warming' mean nothing to you? How many times do I have to talk to you about your carbon footprint?”

Joe beamed happily this time and pulled me into a hug. “I missed you, Summers.”

“Missed you too, Jonas,” I said, also beaming. I pulled away. “What happened to your hair?”

“I cut it. Do you like it?” Joe ruffled his hair.

“Yeah. It reminds me of the old times, you know?”

Joe started towards the elevator, but I held up an arm to stop him. “We're taking the stairs.”

“What?” Joe asked. “Why?”

“I forgot to tell you this last time, but the elevators easily break down,” I explained.

“I don't have a problem with that,” Joe said.

I raised my eyebrows.

“Kidding,” Joe said hastily.

“When does your flight leave?” I asked.

“Mine? You mean ours,” Joe corrected as we climbed up the stairs.

“No. I can't go. I have class and I don't want to skip them.”

“But you promised! Besides, you can take your classes online.”

“Well,” I protested, “I need to take them here. I can go to Europe sometime in five years or something.”

“It was part of our bet!” Joe said. “You can't back out of bets. Otherwise – otherwise something bad's gonna happen.”

I laughed. Now, being with him again, it was like nothing bad happened between us. It was like we were Joe and Ava: the best friends again, instead of Joe and Ava: the two friends who are keeping a lot from one another.

“Oh?” I said. “Like what?”

“Like…like what if the plane crashes and I die?” Joe said, demonstrating an explosion using his hands and his own sound effects.

“Then if I went to the plane with you, we'd both die,” I concluded.

“No, because you wouldn't displace your whole I'm-breaking-a-bet bad luck on me. You can also bring that good luck charm I gave you when we were eight. You know, the one that prevents plane crashes or something, because you had a fear of planes?”

I can't believe he remembers that.

“I can't participate in your huge polluting of the Earth,” I said stubbornly. “And you should also not jet off often. You're killing the planet.”

“Okay,” Joe said. “Then, just for you, I'll give a whole lot to a charity of your choice and…and the whole of Europe, we'll ride on an environmentally friendly Vespa – well, except for when we actually do need a plane. How does that sound?”

“Who's going to be driving? You? Knowing you, you'll crash us in – at most – thirty minutes.”

“Says the one who actually did crash a car.”

I elbowed him. “Shut up.”

“That was really crazy, Av. Everything around us was spinning.”

“We were spinning.”

“That's coordinant.”

“What?”

“I've been expanding my vocabulary.”

“What, by typing in 'big words' into Google?”

Joe laughed. “You know me too good, Summers.”

“No, it's 'You know me too well.'”

“Hey, but really, Av. Come with me to Europe.”

“I can't. I have to focus on my studies. And I'm not going to participate in your global warming promoting.”

“Ava, it's Europe. You've never been to Europe before and you can do your studying there.”

I sighed. “I don't know, Joe…”

“Come on!” Joe persisted. “We can go to Paris together and I'll take you to the Lover.”

“Joe, for the last time, it's Louvre.”

We reached my floor and I unlocked my door, letting the two of us in.

“Ava, come on. Just go with me. Besides, we pinky promised!” Joe insisted. “We made a deal! And we've never broken any of our deals before.”

“Fine,” I said, giving up. “I'll go with you, but –”

I found myself suddenly in Joe's embrace, breathing in his scent, feeling that warm feeling he gave me whenever he touched me.

“Yes!” Joe said loudly next to my ear. “Love you, Ava!”

It was a good thing he couldn't see my face right now. Otherwise, he would've seen me blushing furiously, a smile on my face that was far too big. Even though he meant it like, “I love you Ava! You're a great friend!” instead of the way he'd say it to someone he thought was his soulmate or something. And trust me, I know this. It was in his voice. It's like the way someone says “I love you” to you when you let them copy their homework.

“Don't let Demi hear you say that,” I replied teasingly.

Joe pulled away slightly so that I was still in his arms, but he was able to see my pink face. I could see that he was beaming brightly.

“No, seriously, Av, you are the most wonderful, most amazing person I've ever met,” Joe said excitedly. “If I'm ever rude to you again –”

“– I'll know you're normal again,” I finished for him.

“No, really, Av,” Joe said, still looking quite beside himself. “You are so awesome.”

“One thing though. How the heck did you do that? Convince my dean, that is.”

“That's for me to know and for you not to.”

I pulled away from the hug completely. “Oh, that's nice.”

“No! I mean, like, I'm not really allowed to say.” Joe pulled out something from his pocket. “And this is what you'll have to do.”

I took the piece of paper and read it, taken aback by how much I'd have to do. Films, essays, reading, videos – the list went on.

“Joe, I can't do this,” I muttered. “This is too much.”

Joe snatched the list back from me. “Of course you can! See here, look. I'll even do half of these for you – or no, all of them!”

“No!” I said, scandalized. “I need to learn, Joseph.”

“Well, you're going. You already said – two times, you should admit – that you're going. So, I'm going to drag you out of here if I have to. And no, without your packed things, if you go unwillingly, because I'm just going to drag you out.”

And judging by the look on his face, I assumed he was actually serious. Well, that's Joe for you.

“Alright, alright!” I said. “Just let me pack right now – and don't help. I know how you are with organization and you'll just mess everything up.”

{∞∞∞}

Several hours later, I found myself boarding a small private jet with Joe, who still looked extremely excited.

“Europe's gonna be really amazing,” Joe kept saying. “I need to take you to so many things. Like in London – wow. And Belgium! We'll eat Belgian waffles! And – oh my God, there's Paris! I love Paris….”

As he rambled on, I rushed into the airplane, only to find that there were only about five rows. The white leather seats were all window seats, all singles, but they were in pairs that faced each other, a table in between.

Well, good to know that I can at least somewhat work, I thought as I settled down on a chair

“…and there's this whole romantic atmosphere,” Joe rambled on as he sat down in a chair opposite of mine. “It's just so amazing and I'll take you to the Love Ray. You've always wanted to see that.”

I nodded absentmindedly as I took out a notebook and began on essay #1's rough draft.

“I'm gonna get us something,” Joe announced, leaving the seat he just sat in a second ago. However, he was soon back and handed me a Kit Kat.

“Thanks,” I muttered, tapping my fingers on the table, trying to think of something to write.

“Hey,” Joe said suddenly. “I really am sorry for what I said last week, okay?”

I stiffened, my eyes still on the paper. “Yeah?”

“It's just, I saw that it was still bothering you and stuff.”

“Oh.”

“And you're speaking in one words right now.”

I looked up at him, noting that his face was full of concern and guilt. It suddenly hit me that I didn't need to hear it. I knew he didn't mean it and that it was one of those things Joe always said without thinking.

“It's okay,” I said. “Just forget it.”

“No,” Joe insisted. “I really shouldn't have –”

“Joe. Forget it.”

Joe grinned timidly at me. I smiled back at him to show him that it was okay.

“Okay then. But really, what can I do for you?” Joe asked. “There has to be a charity you want help with or something, knowing you.”

My eyes widened as I remembered something.

“Oh yeah!” I exclaimed. I took out my charity notebook and flipped through the pages.

“Goodness gracious, Summers,” Joe said.

“Shut up.” I continued flipping through the notebook until I found what I was looking for. I showed it to Joe. “See, it's this charity where we raise money and donate a goat to a poor family.”

Joe stared at me. “What?”

“You know – a goat. So they can get milk and stuff from it.”

“Milk? From a goat?”

“Uh, yeah. Now come on, join the team.”

“No. I'd rather not participate in your goat killing.”

“They're not going to kill it.”

“Yeah. To make goat meat, because the poor family would be hungry.”

“No. They'd just make cheese and milk and stuff and sell it.” Then I added casually, “Besides, James joined. It's actually pretty amazing how much he's contributed so far, seeing as it's only been –”

Joe grabbed my pen from my hand. “I'm joining. Can I be vice president, then? Or a really, really high thing for it?”

{∞∞∞}

“Yeah. Yeah…okay. Bye.” Joe hung up his cellphone, grinning at me.

“You are going to be so proud of me for what I just did,” he said to me.

“What?” I asked.

“In a few hours, we're flying over to New York – on a public airplane – and taking the same plane as the others, so that way, we won't take up a lot of airplanes!”

I laughed. “That's good.”

“Hey, come with me, there's something I wanna show you. It's this…stop we'll make on the way to the airport, okay?”

“Sure,” I said, bending down to stuff a textbook I was reading into my already crammed school bag. I struggled to lift it up enough to be able to sling it over my shoulder.

“Need help?” Joe asked as I finally succeeded.

“Nope.”

Except this stupid bag was practically dragging my shoulder down because of its weight.

Joe held out a hand to me. “C'mon. That looks really heavy.”

“I'm fine,” I said. I walked to the front door to leave. Following, Joe lifted his own luggage, but being Joe, he forgot to zip it up correctly and all of it contents spilled onto the floor.

Joe groaned and started to throw his clothes in a random order back into his luggage.

“Joe, stop!” I said, putting his clothes back out.

“Hey, what are you doing?!” Joe cried.

“You have to pack neatly, Joseph,” I said while looking into the living room.

That's when I noticed the flannel shirt rolled up on a chair.

“Joe,” I stated.

“Hmm?” Joe asked, now carefully folding his clothes.

“Why is a shirt on the chair?”

“Oh, I'll put it up when I get back – see, I was wearing it around the house once, and it was hot, so I took it off.”

“Well, put it back. It's supposed to be in your DRESSER. Everything has its place and your shirt's place is not on a chair!”

Joe smiled at me. “Honestly, Av, sometimes I think you're just crazy.”

“Put it away! It's bothering me that nobody's even bothered to pick it up.”

“Fine,” Joe grumbled, getting up.

While Joe was gone, I noticed a thick manila envelope and picked it up.

“Hey, what's this?” I asked Joe when he came back, holding up the envelope.

Joe's eyes widened and he hastily took the envelope away from me. “Nothing, nothing.”

{∞∞∞}

“Here's what I wanted to show you,” Joe said as we stopped by at the edge of some woods.

I stared out the window. “Joe, what –?”

“What most people don't know is that there's a small lake behind those. But it's really nice and – I'll just show you.”

Joe got out of the car and opened the door for me – something he didn't even really do before.

“I found this place as I was jogging once. It's really close to home and it's just my quiet spot.”

Soon, we reached the lake. It was small, but it was – well, beautiful. The moonlight reflected off the still surface of the lake and the trees surrounding it just gave it a nature-like feel.

“Wow,” I whispered.

“It's nice, right?” Joe said.

I walked over to the dock and laid there, staring at the stars. Joe laid down next to me. His arm inched under me and pulled me to him, my head using his shoulder as a pillow. My heartbeat was increasing rapidly again and I couldn't stop the dreamy smile from appearing on my face.

“And see there?” Joe said, pointing up at the stars with his free hand. “That's the Big Dipper.”

I giggled. “Joe, that's the Little Dipper.”

“How do you know?”

I pointed to where he was pointing. “The handle's curved. That's the Big Dipper right there.” I pointed to it.

“Oh. Let me guess, you read that in a book once? Honestly, your nose was always in a book.”

“You say that like it's a bad thing,” I said in an offended tone.

“Nah. I know I tease you about it a lot, but…I've always admired it about you. Really, it's thanks to you that I actually graduated high school with a 4.0.”

Whoa. Just whoa.

Beside me, Joe's body shifted and soon, he was above me and I found myself staring into his eyes instead of the stars. His hand traveled to my hip and I could swear my heartbeat was accelerating to a thousand times a minute. His arm, which was under me, slipped from under me and moved to my side to support his weight.

“Um,” I said, “well – uh – t-thanks. Er – your hair now reminds me of – of the old times.”

Dear me,

Shut up.

Joe smiled at me. “Well, you know, some people were calling my hair overgrown.”

We both laughed, but it soon died away.

Joe's leg went in between mine and I was becoming unaware of our surroundings. My eyes drifted down from his to his lips and I saw him do the same. Joe's head started to move toward mine, and I started to do the same. As I got closer, my eyes started to close…

Then, something – or someone, rather, decided to honk out in the street.

Eff you, person. Eff you.

I pulled away and opened my eyes.

“Hey,” I said softly, “we – we should just – we should be going now. Can't be late for our flight.”

“Yeah,” Joe said, getting off of me.

During the walk back to the car, my mind was racing with thoughts.

Did we really just almost kiss? I can't believe we actually almost did. I couldn't believe it. I was about to kiss him.

But I couldn't just have kissed him, I decided. Before we decided to advance on to – well, the more-than-friends level, Joe had to mature. Actually, we both needed time to think about it. The events last week proved that. He had to know that his feelings for me were real. He had to be sure that what he felt for me was real, otherwise, if we dated before he was sure, he could hurt me badly. Our friendship wouldn't be the same anymore.

“So, Av,” Joe said. “What –?”

Knowing what he was going to go on about, I said quickly, “Forget it Joe. It – it was nothing. We were just jet lagged or w-we just probably ate something bad at the airplane. We weren't thinking corr – right. It never – let's just not talk about it.”

Joe sighed and ran his hand through his hair. He nodded, avoiding my gaze.

But a part of me was still in that moment at the lake, when it was just us two.