A Friend Like Me

Like a little tiger play fighting,
I was hurting myself again and again,
Because I'm hopeless
Hopeless - KT Tunstall

“Where are you going?” Joe queried as I rushed around my apartment, grabbing my shoes and stuffing money, lip gloss, and my cell phone into a small bag, searching for my keys.

I wasn't in the mood to be followed around, so I said, “For a walk.”

“No,” Joe observed. “You're wearing makeup. You never wear makeup, but when you do, it's to those special occasions. Plus, your eyebrows just moved. So,” Joe said, leaning the barstool he was sitting in backwards, “where are you going?”

“Joe, don't lean on that. You're going to fall. And I'm going to a fair.”

Being his disagreeable self, Joe told me, “No, I'm not gonna fall.” Only right after he said that, he tipped the chair back too far and landed on the ground with a very loud crash.

I rushed to him. “Are you okay?” I asked, stifling a laugh. I held out a hand to him.

Joe, groaning, reached up…and pulled me down, instead of letting me help him up. “Ha ha. Can I come?” He stood up and offered me a hand, which I took.

I shook my head. “No.”

Joe held up the keys I was looking for. “You can't leave without your keys. I hid the spare, too, so…”

“Joe!” I lunged for them, but he jerked them out of my reach. “Hey!”

“I'll give it to you if you say that I can come,” Joe said as I stood on my tiptoes, desperately reaching for the keys that Joe dangled over my hand.

“Ugh, Joe! Give it here!” Arm outstretched, I jumped, but Joe clenched the keys in his fist more tightly.

“Now, Summers, that's not correct grammar.”

“Shut up! I'm going to be late!”

“Are you going to this fair with James?”

I stared daggers at him.

Because let's face it. Either way I answer, he's going to know the answer.

“Yes,” I said grudgingly before trying to grab the keys again.

“Huh. More reason to not give this to you, then. Seriously, just bring me along and I'll give these to you.”

“Never.”

{∞∞∞}

“So…erm…how did you two meet?” James asked, nodding towards Joe and I.

Joe rolled his eyes. “Wouldn't you like to know.”

I dug my heel into Joe's foot discreetly (or at least I hoped it was discreet), but since I was wearing flats and not heels (I never do), Joe just smiled casually at me. “Joe and I? Well…we were three – well, Joe was – and we were at this waiting area at this grocery store. Don't ask me why, but they had this waiting area for the kids. Anyway, he was coloring and I saw and apparently, I got mad at him because he was coloring outside the lines, coloring stuff colors they weren't. Like, the grass was purple, I think.

“Then, our moms got there because we got into a fight, actually, and…that's it. We're a lot calmer now, though – I think.”

James nodded. “That sounds great.”

Joe's hand sneaked onto the small of my back. I cleared my throat, but instead of withdrawing his hand like a gentleman, he started to do that thumb-stroking thing he does, instantly making it harder to…well, to get him to stop, actually. And to focus.

Summoning up the will power I had, I leaned away from him and pushed his hand away. I looked down and started to pull hay out of the seats, wishing that the World's Most Awkward Hay Ride would end.

“You have a hay in your hair, Ava,” Joe said, plucking a stray piece of hay out of my hair.

Well, thank you for that, Joseph. That completely takes away the tension.

Not.

“Well…” I said, staring at the hay-covered floor, “we should…uh…go to the mirror maze after this or something.”

“Alright,” said the driver, “we're done. Hope you guys have a great time!”

Joe and James got off the truck at the same time, avoiding each other's gazes as I dusted myself off. I clamored over to the end of the truck, and as I prepared to climb off, both Joe and James held their hands out to me. I automatically reached for Joe's, but drew my hand back when I remembered James was there.

You know what? This is getting ridiculous.

I can take perfect care of myself, thank you very much, and do not need assistance in climbing off of a hay ride truck.

I leapt smartly off the edge, not caring to use anything for support.

Except, as many of you probably know already, a hay ride's floor is dusted with hay, ergo slippery.

So, I ended up half leaping, half tumbling off of the hay ride, stumbling into Joe. He caught me around the waist, and for a split moment, I was in his embrace. For a second, I forgot that James was with us.

“Whoa, careful there, Summers,” Joe said, helping me up.

“Uh – thanks,” I said, flustered, biting my lip to keep from smiling idiotically or giggling madly.

The thing is, though, I felt more in that embrace than I do in a kiss with James.

Stupid Joe.

“So – uh – we should just go now,” I said. “You know. To the rides and games and whatnot.”

“Hey,” Joe whispered in my ear. “When we get to the mirror maze, let's ditch this guy.”

“Joe, no. And can you leave? Stop butting in on my social life!” I pulled him to the side. “Hold on, James. I need to talk to Joe here.”

“What?” Joe asked when I pulled him behind a booth.

“Will you stop that?!” I hissed.

“Stop what? It's true. He's so—ugh. I can't stand him.”

“Oh? Why, then?”

Joe started to list things, counting them on his fingers as he went. “He's boring. He's not right for you. You deserve better. He's dull. He's an ass.”

I folded my arms across my chest. “You don't know anything about him, so I'll thank you not to insult him.”

“He believed that article about you!”

“Oh, hark who's talking! What about Demi, huh, and the fact that she and her mom told a gossip site about you two?”

“That's different.”

“Why did you even come here?”

“Because I just…I want to look after you.”

I scoffed and walked away, joining James again. We all walked in silence toward the mirror maze.

“Wait,” James said, taking my hand. “I need to talk to you first.”

“Alright,” I said.

“I mean…ah…alone.” James pointed to behind a booth.

“Okay,” I said, turning to follow him, but Joe clamped his hand around mine.

“Don't go,” he murmured.

I wrestled my hand away from him. “I'll be right back.”

“Ava,” James said. “Want to meet me for dinner later?”

This is what he wanted to talk to me about? I was about to say yes, but I could still feel the feeling of Joe's hand on mine.

And I realized that saying yes would only fuel this crazy cycle Joe and I were in – the one where we'd have our little romantic moment, only to be ruined, only to go back to…well, whatever we were, only to keep our little game.

“Dinner?” I repeated.

“Yeah,” James said, putting his hands in his pockets nervously. “Do you have plans yet?”

Agreeing to this would push us into our cycle of jealousy and hurt and I'm tired of hurting Joe and myself over and over. Don't get me wrong though, I like James.

It's just that Joe comes first.

He always has.

“The thing is, James,” I said, trying to say something that wouldn't hurt him or whatever. “I…um…want to take this slowly. I just – I'm not ready for a relationship, you know? I like to know people first. And…I don't know. I think we should get to know each other more. Don't get me wrong. I like you. I really do, but…yeah.”

James looked hurt for a second, but he masked it with a small, sad smile. “Alright. I understand.”

“But, you know, if you still feel the same way after all that…we can…you know.”

I sound like…well, I don't even know what. An awkward middle-schooler unexperienced in the realms of dating.

Which, you know, I sort of am.

James nodded and we walked back to where Joe was waiting.

“What'd you guys talk about?” Joe asked. I shook my head at him, not saying anything.

Together, we entered the mirror maze, after paying the guy.

“What'd he tell you?” Joe asked as James went one way and we went the other.

“Nothing,” I said. I didn't want to tell him out in public, not after what happened with Katelyn Sage. I looked around and saw that Joe was missing. “Joe?” I called out.

It doesn't help that the whole mirror maze is dark (to make this harder, presumably), only illuminated by small pinpricks of red light in a pattern along the floor, along the sides of the mirrors, along the ceiling.

Knowing Joe, he's probably hiding somewhere, ready to scare me.

But, looking around, I saw that he was nowhere to be found – and there were neither curtains nor corners to hide behind – the angled mirrors would reveal at least a part of him if he was hiding.

Groaning to myself, I walked around a corner. Stretching my arms out in front of me, I found out that I was stuck in a dead end, so I turned back around and headed down a different way – at least, I thought it was a different way. I tried to memorize the way I was going, but I couldn't. I soon lost track.

Frustration, impatience, and a little fear escalated in me as the minutes progressed. I had no idea where I was now – for all I knew, I could be back at the beginning again. By now, I had half a mind to give up. But then, my fingers grazed the soft fabric of a curtain. Pulling it to the side, I saw that this was the exit.

Relieved and overjoyed, I walked quickly down the hallway and out the door. The sunlight, bright and glaring, blinded me for a second before my eyes could adjust from the darkness of the maze. Squinting, I stepped out of the threshold.

“Hey, you made it out. Yeah, high five!”

I looked up and saw Joe, sitting lazily on the steps leading up to the entrance. Grinning at me, he got up and held up a hand. I high-fived it, but Joe caught my hand, slipping his fingers in between mine, curling them around my hand.

“What are you doing?” I asked breathlessly.

“I don't know,” Joe admitted, but then he pulled me into a hug, wrapping his arms around my shoulders. “But, listen Av, I'm serious here. He really isn't right for you.”

I stayed there for a while, just breathing in his scent.

What? He smells good.

And that's another thing I've noticed. Joe just smells like…well, I don't even know what, actually. It's indescribable. All I know is that he smells great. But James smells like, well, like cologne, actually. And fresh laundry. Which isn't bad, it's just…I don't know.

“I bet you I can beat you in that knock-the-bottles-down game,” Joe challenged.

I pulled away. “Oh really? Let's see, then.”

We strolled over to one of the booths, manned by a dark-haired girl in a micro-mini, low-cut, skin-tight dress.

“I'll go first,” Joe volunteered.

“Hey,” the girl said. Her voice was fruity and unctuous. “It's a dollar per three balls.”

“Okay,” Joe said, placing a dollar down on the counter.

“Sure that's all you need?” I asked, smirking.

“Oh, ha ha.”

“If it helps,” Micro-mini cut in, “I think you can do it.” She bent over, resting her arms down on the counter, exposing more of her cleavage to us.

Um. Excuse you. Nobody wants to see that.

Except Joe's eyes flickered down, causing a smile to appear on her lips. I raised an eyebrow.

Shooting me a sideways glance, Joe said, “I'm Joe.”

“Oh?” Micro-mini said. “You don't look like a Joe.”

“Uh, it's called the Jonas Brothers,” I said, irritated. “And you'd have to live under a rock if you live in a first-world country and haven't heard of Joe Jonas.”

Micro-mini shot me a glare. “Oh, I know.” She turned back to Joe. “This your girlfriend?” She pulled down her dress, exposing more of her cleavage.

And stupid Joe took the bait, his eyes drifting down again before going up.

If this were Greek mythology, Micro-mini would be the siren. And Joe would be the foolish sailor who jumps off the boat to her. Then he'd be eaten.

Joe's eyes drifted over to me again before settling on Micro-mini. “Her?” he said, sounding distracted. “Oh, no. She's just a friend.”

Ugh. You know what? I'm going to step in now.

I'll be the Aphrodite to Joe's Butes (from Argonautica) and I'll save him from the anthropophagous siren, Micro-mini.

“You know what?” I spoke up. “Joe, let's go to that stall over there.” I pointed to the stall across this one. “It has the same game – this one's probably rigged, anyway.” I snatched the dollar, handed it to Joe, and proceeded to walk to there.

Triumph flashed across Joe's face before he masked it with disappointment. “Oh, fine.”

And then I realized that I'm the one that took the bait – Joe was using Micro-mini to make me jealous and it worked.

Stupid Joe.

“A dollar for three tries,” the man behind the counter (thankfully not a scantily clad girl) said. Joe handed him the dollar.

“Bragging rights to the winner?” Joe said, as he picked up the first ball. “And…loser has to treat the winner to…anything the winner wants for a whole day?”

“You're on,” I said. I leaned down, propping my elbows on the counter.

Joe's eyebrows furrowed as he looked on at the stacked milk bottles in concentration. His tongue poked out between his lips, and he practically threw himself forward as he threw the ball toward the bottles.

They didn't budge.

I laughed, clapping my hands. “Brilliant.”

Joe blushed. “Shut up.” He tried again; this time, the bottle at the bottom left corner (the one he aimed at) moved about a millimeter to the back.

After six tries, Joe gave up, I (and the booth-runner guy) was laughing so hard my stomach hurt, and James was still in the mirror maze (poor guy).

“Oh yeah?” Joe said. “Let's see you try.”

“Okay,” I said. Then I whispered in Joe's ear, “I know how to beat this – I googled it once.”

Joe frowned at me. “Well, you're still not going to win.” I threw my arm back, ready to toss it toward the bottles, but Joe touched my face softly.

I glanced at him, my attention dwindling. “Joe? What are you – what are you doing?”

“Oh,” Joe said breezily. “You just had something on your face.” His hand drifted down my cheek, stopping at my back, stroking it with his back.

I threw the ball just as Joe lightly tickled my side with his thumb. The ball zoomed past the bottles.

“Oh dear,” Joe said. “You were saying?”

“You did that on purpose!” I accused.

“Did what?”

Sending him a withering glare, I slapped his hand away.

I swung my arm back just as Joe said, “Wait, Av, here.” He pushed a lock of hair behind my ear, looking into my eyes, as I weakly threw the ball.

It landed just over the counter.

“Joe!” I exclaimed. “Stop doing doing that!”

A smirk spread across Joe's lips as he dropped his hand. “Doing what?”

“Distracting me.”

“Distracting you? It's not my fault that I drive you crazy.”

I lobbed the last remaining ball at his head (and thankfully this time, my aim was true) as hard as I could, causing Joe to wince. “You do not drive me crazy.”

Joe smiled at me. “Really.”

“Really.”

“Okay,” the booth guy said, “here. A consolation prize for you two.” He plopped down a small brown teddy bear onto the counter.

Joe took it and handed it to me. “Here. Its name shall be…Xhaiden.”

'What?! No!”

“Too bad. Its name is officially Xhaiden.”

“There you guys are,” James said, appearing behind me. “Sorry, I got lost in the maze.”

“Obviously,” Joe said.

I elbowed him. “Uh…let's go get something to eat.”

“But fair food's not that healthy,” Joe whined as we climbed the steel, steep stairs to this restaurant in the fair.

“Who cares?”

“But I have to stay fit, Av.”

“Oh, come on. It's one day. Nothing's going to happen.”

“Do you know how much cholesterol is in a funnel cake?!”

“Joe, you're so feminine sometimes.”

“No. I'm just looking out for myself.” Joe started to turn to go back down the stairs, still looking at me. “Come on. Let's just go to –”

Joe was rolling down the stairs, though, unable to finish his sentence. Groaning, he sprawled out at the bottom.

{∞∞∞}

“You know,” I said as I gave Joe an gel ice pack to place on his forehead. “You should really watch where you're going.”

“I know,” Joe moaned. “Av, my head hurts.”

I sat down on the couch he was laying down at. “I have some ibuprofen in the cabinet.”

“What?”

“Pain killers, Joseph.”

“Oh. No. And my knee hurts.”

“Well, I can't look at it, remember? Your pants won't roll up high enough. Why do you wear pants that tight, anyway?”

Joe shrugged. “It looks nice, I guess. Besides, I'm used to it now.”

I took his hand in mine. “You sure you don't need anything else?”

Joe nodded. “You're so motherly, Summers. What did James want, anyway?”

“Oh, he asked me to go to dinner with him.”

“What did you say?”

“Well…I told him that…”

“What did you say?!”

“I'm getting there!”

“No, you're not. Now, what did you say?!”

“I told him that I didn't want a relationship anymore.”

Then, I swear Joe's face was going to break from the way he was beaming. “Really?!”

“Yeah.” I got up off the couch and walked to my counter, where my unread mail sat. I sifted through them uninterestedly, until I came across a letter from NYU. I opened it and read the first two sentences.

“Congratulations on your acceptance to NYU's Study Abroad program! We look forward to seeing you in Prague in the spring!”