I Can Keep A Secret

The next few weeks I waited. Nothing seems longer than the time you're wishing would pass by. Alex and I continued our little dance and I continued to shoot down John as anything, but more than a friend. Nothing seemed to be changing. Nothing. The worst part of this waiting thing is that I have to wait for someone else to make a move, Alex that is.

I sighed getting up from my bunk and pulling yet another pair of shorts (I mixed it up with some khaki) and another cut tank top, this time I chose grey. I sighed stroking my lashes with mascara and walked out of the bus, pulling my cell phone from its charger in the wall. I felt the parking lot under my feet and realized I had forgotten shoes and ran back on. When I came back out I saw John hiding a face red from laughter.

"What?" I chuckled pulling the heel of the shoe over my own and trying to secure it by kicking the asphalt.

"Nothing," John shrugged. I hated this answer, nothing is ever nothing, its something you don't want to tell the person. I was slightly agitated from the lack of "signals" from Alex and it was driving me insane. I had no time for these games, I rolled my eyes and pushed past John when I realized he grabbed my arm and brought me back.

"Go out with me," he began.

"No," I interrupted rudely.

"So," He continued making me flush with embarrassment, "you can get your mind off whatever is on your mind, starts with an Alex ends with Gaskarth, and you can stop acting like the eighth dwarf," he said raising his eyebrows. No one had told me off like that since my father told me cheerleading and dance wasn't a sport in fifth grade.

"Alright, fine, but I don't understand the eighth dwarf quip," I said shrugging attempting to keep my cool that John just blew away from me. He smiled his patented crooked grin and nodded.

"Mopey," He explained and I laughed, for the first time in about two and half weeks I laughed, hard too. I nodded and told him to text me later. I had found out that John had been nosing around and stolen my number. He had been texting me incessantly before I realized it was him.

"Hey Lindsay Lohan," Raine waved me over as I passed a mass amount of people in the breakfast catering line. I felt a little bit bad, but at the same time I would probably just fester in my anger and take it out on some poor, innocent bystander. Before returning my attention to the second weird nickname I had received today.

"Lindsay Lohan?" I asked laughing slightly before reaching her and hugging her to sneak into the line. Jack smiled to himself as he and Alex hovered over his iPhone.

"I ran out of adjectives for slut," Raine shrugged before realizing that Jack and Alex were listening to Miley Cyrus, Raine slapped Jack, hard, on the side of the head.

"Holy Schnauzer Son Of A Bastard!" Jack said holding his head where Raine's hand had been. It seemed harsh, but Jack had been forewarned. Raine had a deep hatred of all things Miley and I understood it being a semi-respectible woman, but Jack drooled anyways.

"You're a child jackass," Raine sneered before trying to look at his phone and replace it with Iron Maiden, Raine's preferred musical ventures.

"That's why my parents named me Jack," Jack grinned, he loved telling that story, especially when bimbo fans believed it. I laughed and shook my head, Alex looked up at me and smiled, brewing a blush in my cheeks.

"Anyways," Raine said flipping her reddish bob over her shoulder, I mocked her scoffing slightly before she slapped me lightly. The sound must have reminded Jack of his wound because he held his hand on it rubbing it gently before jutting out his lower lip and leaning on Alex.

"I might go out to dinner with John tonight," I offered to her unofficial 'what's up'. She seemed taken back by this and Alex's attention flew to me almost immediately. I smiled innocently, I ordered some coffee and some french toast sticks ahead of everyone else still utterly confused with my decisions.

"But why?" Raine asked seemingly disgusted before ordering the same thing.

"He noticed I seemed down and wanted to be a good friend and take me out to dinner to get my mind off of certain things," I explained grabbing some fake sugars and piling my stuff next to Zack who had gone out running as always and got to the line while other bands were suffering with hangovers.

"That's bullshit Leia," Jack said with a myriad of breakfast foods piled up on his plate, I stared curiously at his tiny body and the mass amounts of food he consumed.

"Why is that bullshit Jack-ass?" I smiled coyly and he giggled slightly at my use of his favorite lie.

"Because once a guy establishes he's interested in you, he's not just going to back off to be friends with you. That happens with guys like Noah from the Notebook or Jack from Titanic, not John O'Callaghan," Alex finished for him sitting next to me a certain level of resentment could be detected in his voice. I did freely laugh at his feminine choice of movies to pull examples of.

"Jack from All Time Low, too" Raine laughed turning towards Jack, they shared a kiss and smiled as if they were in their own personal world. I cleared my throat uncomfortably.

"Well, thank you Turk and Carla, but as I've mentioned numerous times, just because you're married doesn't make you the fucking Dali Llama of love alright? I don't want a fucking Rack," I rolled my eyes and got glares from both of them.

"Rack?" They looked at each other in unison then to me curiously.

"Culmination of Raine and Jack, Rack, like Brangelina, ie any retarded couple who think that being married makes you all knowing," I explained condescendingly. I felt bad being such a bitch to everyone around me, but I was on edge. I felt my phone vibrating in my pocket and I sighed seeing Cameron.

"Hello?" I answered, Cameron proceeded to tell me to meet him at the tent and we would start our work day early. "Well duty calls," I sighed standing up, I saw Jack giggle with Raine at the use of the word duty.

"I'm friends with four-year-olds," I sighed getting up and scruffing Zack's hair before throwing away my trash. I walked away feeling like someone was following me. I turned and realized I was correct.

"So you're really going out with John?" Alex asked panting to keep up with my long stride. It was like he didn't comprehend that he was taller than me and could take bigger steps than me, instead was taking twenty small steps.

"Really," I said seeing Cameron I waved him down, Alex grabbed my hand- I was really getting sick of that. What made guys think they can stop you when you have places to go for their personal agendas.

"Can I see you afterwards, I mean its not a date right?" Alex asked quickly under his breath realizing people were around. His voice was bathed and soaked in jealousy. I raised my eyebrow and shrugged, this could be a sign, but I needed verbal affirmation.

"Let's do this!" I said, yelling out to Cameron who raised his arms up above his head excitedly. I laughed jogging over to him, I turned over my shoulder and smiled at a frozen Alex. I mouthed later and he nodded in slow motion, still awkwardly standing with out a purpose.

The set for All Time Low was adorable, I simply watched while Cameron filmed A Day To Remember by himself. I stood dancing alone, Raine laughed at me from the other side of the stage and I flicked her off.

"How's the herpes going Alex?" Jack asked as he switched guitars.

"Good still burning, hows the old chain and shackles?" Alex smiled cutely, girls in the audience seemed confused. Due to mass of girls being fans, the fact Jack was married never surfaced and I don't think Raine minded.

"Good, how the lonely nights, like a wolf?" Jack laughed and Alex laughed as a nonverbal touche.

"Still better than being whipped," He shrugged, Rian played the classic comedy beat.

"Whatever dude, I'm married to my best friend," Jack laughed, a mixture of shock and disappointment came from the audience Jack nodded seriously admitting it was the truth, Raine simply seemed confused. I could tell, however well she was hiding it she was ecstatic, not only that Jack came out of a very different closet, but that he said she was his best friend, which was verbatim what she wanted in a husband at age three.

"What?" Alex asked, looking like he was about to break down in tears.

"Yup, I'm sorry. It's true," Jack said turning and winking at Raine before dramatically turning away from Alex. Alex responded by taking off his microphone and sinking to his knees with a dramatic "nooooo!" After what seemed like five minutes he popped up and started playing 'Dear Maria'. I laughed, then again who wasn't, I looked into the crowd, everyone dancing and connecting with All Time Low on such a personal level without ever having met them was extraordinary. I made my way out met up with Cameron.

We spent the rest of the day joking and filming the Blair Witch Project scene, signing things and joking around with the rest of the tents. It had become a daily ritual for some fan to bring food for us, making us impeccably lazy. Soon the aisles cleared and we packed up our tent. I don't know what had happened today, but I was burnt slightly, a pink hue frosting my cheeks.

"Hey Leia," I looked up from Cameron's newly acquired Clown glasses, a gift from a fan. He laughed when he saw me.

"Yes, Johnjamin," I made up a full name for him, since his real name was a short one.

"Are you ready for our dinner date?" He asked holding out his hand, I looked around to Cameron who nodded that they didn't need anymore help and I turned looking around.

"I'm ready for our dinner," I said grabbing his hand scoring some "oh"s and he nodded laughing. He led me to a organic restaurant, I wasn't really hungry, but I knew we were missing catering for this so I decided on an club sandwich. We sat in an awkward silence, I derived that John was mostly talk, not so much a walker.

"Well, I think we should get back," I said the first thing since a comment on the weather and the excellent food. John paid and I thanked him, it seemed than any romantic notion I had towards John had sizzled in a matter of thirty minutes.

"This has been sufficiently awkward," I said stopping in front of the All Time Low bus, I had plans with Alex after this. Not sexual plans, we were going to watch one of the Saw movies since I hadn't seen any of them and Alex hadn't seen this one.

"When you're done wasting your emotions on Alex, I'll be waiting okay?" He said in a serious tone for a minute before kissing me on the cheek and walking away. John had no idea what he was talking about, I climbed on to the bus and saw Alex in a pair of basketball shorts and a beanie on his head.

"Nice outfit," I said he looked up surprised, his feet were bare except for a pair of socks.

"I tried extra hard today, you know for our date?" Alex smiled up at me and my heart fluttered at the word date. 'Date' not 'sexual escapade', for some reason thrilled me more than I should have. I looked around at an empty bus. "You came earlier than I thought you would, so I'm in my lazy clothes," Alex slapped the cushion next to him getting me to sit down.

"Well, as it turns out, John and I have absolutely no chemistry at all," I said raising my eyebrows like some interesting story heard on the news.