Guilt

The room looked much smaller with seven extra people hovering inside of it. Julianne stood surveying the small crowd that had formed in her living room from in front of the large window, whose curtains had been drawn for the occasion. She lifted her arm and pulled back the sleeve of the light sweatshirt she’d slipped on just in case the room got a little chilly. Her watch read 11:30 PM. In half an hour, she could find all her answers—or end up worse off than before.

Earlier in the day, Matt and Julianne cleared the furniture to the outer edges of Julianne’s living room. They then hoisted her rarely used dining table from the dining room and sat it right in the center of the room. All seven of Julianne’s and Kelly’s old friends mulled around the table. They spoke in hushed tones—none of them were fooling around about what was about to happen. The only person who hadn’t arrived was Madam Buxley.

“If that old hag doesn’t arrive soon, we won’t be settled in and ready by midnight,” Margaret complained, standing with her arms grumpily crossed next to Julianne. “I have to work tomorrow too. I can’t wait for her to spend the whole night looking through a crystal ball—which is probably just a fish bowl turned upside down—and muttering under her breath about demons and night vultures. Unlike her, I actually have to make a decent living using my own two hands.”

“Calm yourself, Margaret,” Julianne said. “She’s not old, and she’s not a hag. She’s really quite a nice lady, very responsible and seemingly very good at what she does. I’m sure no matter what, we will not be disappointed...at least not by her.”

“So, what’s all going on with this Pete character? Has he been charged with anything?” Margaret asked.

Julianne shrugged. “He got charged with battery. In jail for like a week, on probation for a couple of years. Poe fired him. End of story, really. Haven’t seen hide nor hair of him since.”

“And that’s it?”

“Basically, yeah.”

“And it doesn’t bother you?”

“No,” Julianne answered truthfully. “It was a one-time deal. I guess he was drunk. In the whole line of horrible things that have happened to me, that was nothing. I’ve moved on.”

“I guess I’m glad to see that you aren’t lingering on it,” Margaret replied.

“No use lingering, really,” Julianne said, turning around and pulling aside one of the curtains at the sound of a car pulling into the driveway. She instantly recognized Madam Buxley’s old, faithful ’01 Taurus and released the curtain, allowing it to slip back into place. A few moments later, a knock came at the door and Julianne fell upon it in an instant.

“Nice to see you again, Julianne,” Madam Buxley greeted, shaking Julianne’s hand and then Matt’s when he sprouted up next to Julianne. After quickly being introduced to the rest of the séance group, one of whom was Kelly’s older brother, Madam Buxley called for everyone to stand about the dining table so that she may seat them appropriately.

She would sit at the head of the dining table. Julianne sat on one side of her; Kelly’s older brother Mark would sit on her other side. It would work better with people closer to the ghost directly connected to the psychic. Margaret sat next to Julianne and then Matt sat on Margaret’s other side. Once everyone had been given a seat and had seated him or herself in it, Madam Buxley pulled a tall cylindrical candle in a candle stand out of her purse and lit it, placing it in the center of the table. She turned off the light and seated herself. The only light in the entire house was the one flickering candle, throwing golden shadows across all of their faces.

“I now ask that everyone link hands and close your eyes,” Madam Buxley demanded. Everyone obliged. Julianne could feel the distant warmth of the candle feather-light across her eyelids. The clock struck midnight and Madam Buxley began to mumble her mantra.

Several minutes passed by without any action. Right when Julianne began to think maybe Madam Buxley was a total fluke, a slight breeze began to pick up in the room. Julianne heard several gasps, including one from Margaret right beside her. All the windows in the house were closed, as were the doors.

The breeze picked up speed, whirling around the séance table and lifting Julianne’s hair from her shoulders. Madam Buxley’s voice grew slowly in volume to battle against the whistling of the wind. Somewhere in the room, Julianne heard a photo frame fall from its shelf.

Madam Buxley screamed, “SHOW YOURSELF NOW OR YOU WILL FOREVER BE TRAPPED IN THE IN-BETWEEN!”

Julianne thought them an odd choice of words to bring forth a ghost, but it worked somehow because the wind died abruptly. Everything settled around them and suddenly Julianne felt her eyelids wrenched involuntarily open.

The candle had somehow stayed lit. Standing above it, straddling it, was a defined, transparent version of Kelly. He stood facing Julianne, his feet planted flatly and firmly on the dining table. She could make out every curl on his head; his hair was slightly less transparent than the rest of him. There was a small smile on his face, the kind of smile you get from a parent when you’ve done something wrong that equally amuses and disappoints them.

A quick glance around the table showed Julianne that everyone looked a little fearful, frozen in their places, except for Julianne herself and Madam Buxley. Margaret appeared to be barely breathing, staring up at Kelly with wide-eyed awe and fear.

Julianne smiled and broke the silence. “Matt, this is my hu—Kelly.” She stumbled over the word “husband”, deciding that Kelly wasn’t technically her husband anymore.

“We will be able to hear Kelly, and Kelly can hear us,” Madam Buxley announced.

“I’m sorry for upsetting you, Kelly,” Julianne blurted out, her smile disappearing as she decided she better get out what she wanted to say; now or never.

“Silly Julianne,” Kelly answered. His voice rang like an echo, but he was clear as a bell. He sounded exactly like Julianne remembered his voice. And instead of issuing from the walls, his voice actually came from the transparent form standing on the table. “You believe that I never moved on because I was upset with you. That is entirely untrue. I’m still here because I couldn’t leave you in the state you were in after my death.”

“But...But I told you I hated you!” Julianne exclaimed. “Right as you walked out that door, I told you I hated you and I think I actually meant it and that was the last thing I ever told you! You ought to be angry with me!”

“Julianne, you realize a lot of things when you’re dead,” Kelly sighed. “And I admit that while I was still living, before the car crash, I was extremely upset to hear those words from your lips with such utter conviction. But once I died, I realized that just because you said you hated me once, you didn’t mean it really. You told me that you loved me a million times more. It just popped out, and you made a mistake. What happened after was just plain unfortunate. I’m not angry with you, Julianne.”

“Then why did you give me all those nightmares? And slammed all the doors that one day?”

“Julianne, I never gave you those nightmares,” Kelly said. “That was all you. Out of your guilt ever since you met Matt.” Kelly glanced at Matt approvingly. “And as for the slamming doors...Hell, I was just trying to get your recluse ass out of the house. I suppose it worked...” He grinned suddenly, glancing between Matt and Julianne.

Julianne frowned. This was too serious of a moment to think about what had happened after Kelly began to slam all Julianne’s doors. No one else at the table understood; they all looked confused. As usual, Julianne ignored them and continued to address Kelly.

“So, you’re not upset that I became friends with Matt...among other things?” Julianne asked carefully.

“Of course not!” Kelly exclaimed. “How could I be? You might have been trying to hide it and reject it, but you were the happiest when Matt was around. I knew I couldn’t allow him to slip through your fingers like you let everyone else, so I took it upon myself to nudge him into meeting you again...”

“You’re the one that broke down Brian’s SUV!” Matt exclaimed, struck by a sudden epiphany. Kelly chuckled.

“Yeah, I was the one. I figured you’d take your friend down to where Julianne worked. And Julianne, you realized what I was doing,” Kelly said, turning back towards Julianne.

“I knew you were the one forcing me to say yes every time he asked me to go somewhere,” Julianne said.

“Mind you, eventually, you were saying yes not because of me but because you wanted to,” Kelly replied.

“Kelly,” Madam Buxley cut in. Kelly turned to look at her. “I’m Madam Buxley, the psychic at the head of this séance. The main reason we brought you here is so Julianne can ask you something. She wants you to be at peace.”

“What, Julianne?” Kelly asked, looking back at Julianne.

“Kelly, I want to know what I can do to help you cross over,” Julianne answered. “I’ll do anything.”

“Well, I’d like the ghost of a Big Mac, please—been dead for a long time, need some food—along with ten peacocks and five talking chickens,” Kelly answered thoughtfully, rubbing his chin. At the look on Julianne’s face, he laughed. “No, it’s much simpler than that. Julianne, I can cross over if you’re truly happy. That’s all I want to be assured of before I leave you forever. Are you truly happy, Julianne?”

Julianne looked away from Kelly’s opaque eyes and glanced at Matt, sitting on the other side of Margaret. Her gaze then slid to Margaret, who still stared in silent wonder at Kelly. It’d been a tough time for her ever since Kelly had died—nothing ever seemed easy when a loved one died. But Matt had made it much easier, especially after her suicide attempt. He always pushed her to be happier and he helped her be happier, bringing Margaret back into her life.

Julianne looked back up at Kelly. “Yes.”

Kelly smiled and instantly flickered. He blew Julianne a kiss and then faded away, taking the flickering flame of the candle with him. They were left in total darkness. And for the first time in a long while, Julianne felt complete.