Hate Me

“Sorry, I don’t have much to do…” I said quietly, heading into the kitchen, looking out for my mom. She was sitting at the table, writing on her laptop.

“Hi, honey.” She said, a tired smile on her face.

“You need to sleep,” I told her immediately. She sighed just before Ryan stepped in the room. “Oh, is it okay if he stays the night?”

“Oh, what’s his name?” She said. I wondered if Ryan felt like we were talking like he wasn’t in the room, though we kind of were.

“He’s Ryan, he goes to my school. Amy’s half-brother,” I hoped that was right. I glanced at him and saw him nod from the corner of my eye. Apparently, I had remembered correctly.

He stepped forward and said, “Nice to meet you.” I hadn’t planned on him being so polite to my mother, honestly. Not that I think he’s impolite, just that I didn’t think he’d say much at all.

“I’m May, and it’s nice to meet you. He can stay the night, honey, just don’t be up too late,” she said before turning back to her computer.

*~*~*~*

“Your mom seems nice,” he stated once we were in my room. He was seated in front of my bookcase, which shelved games, books, and movies.

“Yeah, but she works too much,” I told him, sitting on my bed.

“What does she do?” He asked, grabbing F.E.A.R. off my shelf and looking at the back.

“She’s an editor for a publishing company and a writer in her spare time.”

“I wouldn’t like a job like that. I’m not too great with the writing and creativity thing,” he chuckled. I gave a small smile at that. I didn’t know that having a conversation with him could be so smooth, so easy.

“You’ve played this?” He held up F.E.A.R. “I heard it was pretty scary… for a shooter anyways. You know, shooters are more like for just killing stuff is what I always thought. I like things with a storyline.”

“It’s a good game. It’s kind of survival horror what with paranormal things, just with more action... and enemy units. And it does have a storyline,” I explained. I told him more about F.E.A.R., and then he popped it in the Xbox 360 I had under my t.v. My parents bought it for me awhile back for Christmas..

After awhile of playing, I noticed he really liked to hide behind things and then shoot, using the SlowMo. I never much used the SlowMo. “I think it’s cute how you hide so much,” I chuckled lightly.

“And I think it’s cute how you analyze what I do,”

“Oh, and perhaps we should both wrap ourselves in bows. How cute are we two,” I said, quoting Morrigan from Dragon Age: Origins.

“You’ve played that?!” He questioned in surprise. “That’s one of my favorite games! Who did you romance? I know I romanced Morrigan. Damn she was so-” I was sure he’d say hot or something like that but instead he said, “funny. I liked how she was cynical and sarcastic but also extremely opinionated, saying whatever she wanted but in a way that was really… articulate.”

“Uh, I romanced-” I cut off. I didn’t want to say I romanced Zevran, a male, with my male character. It’s just… I really liked his accent and he was funny, but he had one of those dark pasts what with the Crows and such… Who cares… I might as well say it. “Zevran.”

“A guy?” Ryan’s reaction wasn’t what I expected. His cheeks reddened slightly before he turned away. “Are you-”

“No, I just liked his carefree character.”

“Oh, yeah. Zevran was pretty… uh…”

“You killed him didn’t you?” When you get the cutscene where the Crows ambush you, you have a choice whether or not to kill their leader, Zevran.

“Yeah,” he said, his head falling in defeat.

*~*~*~*~*

I laid down at the other end of my bed and covered myself with my comforter. “I don’t care if you sleep in my bed. Personally, I think it’d be uncomfortable to sleep downstairs with my parents there.” Actually, I just said that to mess with him a bit. He blushed for some reason. Maybe he’s uncomfortable with the idea of sleeping in the same bed as another guy. He’s kind of squeamish, I suppose.

“Okay,” he said, before somehow getting a double kill on F.E.A.R. That surprised me, actually. I thought he’d just say he’d sleep somewhere else.

I was woken up a bit later by a sleeping, or half-asleep Ryan wrapping his arms around me. I froze. Does he think I’m a body pillow? Is he aware that it’s me? Did I… like this? My skin was warming up beneath where his arms were, like a fever. Perhaps the idea of being held gently like this by another human being was nice. I know we don’t know each other too well, but we talked a lot tonight and since… the incident with Sloan. I think I can call him a friend now.

Yeah, just think of this as a friendly hug… just in his sleep. So I didn’t wake him up to tell him what he was doing I just let it be because it was… kind of nice. And so that’s how I fell asleep.