Life in Technicolor

The months slowly trailed by for Valerie as March formed into April and April weaned itself into early May.

It was the busiest time in the shop and today the noise level was almost unbearable. So many women wanted early summer weddings, and day after day the shop was filled with groups of gaggling women who were all on the hunt for the perfect dress. Normally Valerie would have been more than happy to assist these women in fulfilling their dreams but recently it was difficult to focus on making other people happy when she herself was not.

The routine of a suddenly monotonous life was killing her inside and it was all because Andrew had been away since April and his absence was making a clear impact on her.

She couldn’t look forward to him coming into the shop at lunch with a small trinket to cheer her up, or her favourite fruit smoothie to give her the much-needed energy. Valerie’s mum saw the effect that Andrew’s absence had on her too. Her daughter was difficult to keep happy, and a smile almost had to be drag from her with force. At times it took Valerie every once of effort to not snap at the customers when they were being difficult and Mrs Hart had to send her on either an early or extended lunch break.

Valerie began to cling to the old remnants of a routine that she had once possessed before Andrew had been so vital to her life. She would have the same morning routine, the same way of putting her make up on. Her clothes varied little from the grey shirtdress with black flats or very now and then a simple strap dress. There was no one to impress anyway.

She was beginning to feel a little lost all of a sudden and without purpose.

The only joy she currently found was in Pepito and the daily postcards that she received from Andrew. On other tours which he had been on he had sent her postcards too, but this time they seemed so much more meaningful because this was his first solo record after Something Corporate and he had poured his heart into it. The content of the postcards varied. Sometimes they were lyrics, either his own or from her favourite artists. Sometimes they were poems written by himself or borrowed lines from poets before him. Some just said ‘thinking of you’. Postcards had always been their thing. On the rare occasion that she left the state, let alone the country, Val would make sure that Andrew received at least a postcard from her. They didn’t need to have long essays on the back of them, it was more the principle of putting thought into something that would travel state lines just to make someone else smile.

Whenever she saw Andrew scrawled handwriting shine up at her from the thick cream paper, her heart would leap and a long lost smile would find its way onto her face. It was then that Mrs Hart could see some of the old happiness on her daughter’s face and she felt relieved. In this sense both women awaited the postman eagerly every day.

There was no need for elaborate details of his journeys and fan encounters because they spoke on the phone almost everyday and it was then that he shared his days with her. However over the past couple of days the phone calls had become increasingly rare as he made his way closer and closer to New York. The couple of times she had received a short phone call, Andrew had sounded very ill and dispirited.

Val had entreatingly told him to go see a Doctor the minute he made it to New York, and so far he had not reached this destination yet which only left Val with the nagging feeling in her stomach that something was not quite right.

Valerie Jessica Hart had always been taught by her mother that acting on an impulse was not the done thing. It had always brought her into difficulty. For example when Valerie told her second stepfather that she was not going to attend college and instead spend her summer in Las Vegas before starting work in her mother’s shop, he got so angry he broke all their china plates.

But despite all of the punishments and mishaps that occurred every time Valerie acted on impulse, which was a frequent occurrence, often the act that followed the impulse made her happy and added to her character.

However, this time it was different.

The phone had rung at a ridiculous time in the morning, Valerie was still half asleep when she picked up her buzzing phone and held it to her ear. She hadn’t even checked the caller display, but when she heard Andrew’s voice say ‘Val’ in the way that she loved so much she instantly felt wide awake and sat up alert in her bed. She realized that he must have forgotten all about the time difference from New York to LA and so he was acting as her own personal alarm clock for the day.

So she was about to bombard him with question, having not received a postcard for quite some time but Andrew spoke before she could say anything.

“I’m in hospital Val.”

It was as if a bucket of ice had been thrown over her. She had to suppress a shudder and the panic slowly began to rise in the pit of her stomach. He had been complaining of illness for a while now and Bobby had called her up only two days ago to express his concerns about his band mate.

“They want to run some more tests on me. They think… they think it might be something bad. They think it might be cancer.”

It was at that point where the bottom seemed to drop out of Valerie’s life. The word cancer acted like an earthquake that shook every cell in her body, that clearly unlike Andrew’s were healthy and acting in the way that should be in a young person of her age. She thought it was ridiculous and ludicrous how the doctors dare even bring the word cancer into association with Andrew who was only just twenty-two years old. Cancer wasn’t something that happened to someone so young, it wasn’t meant to.

All these thoughts flew through Valerie’s head within the seconds of silence that passed down the phone line from New York to LA. There were so many things she wanted to say but over the phone they seemed meaningless.

“What hospital have they put you in? I’m coming to New York.”

With a hurriedly packed suitcase that had to be sat on in a rush to make it shut and Pepito placed into a dog carrier Valerie had steamed into LAX International Airport demanding the first flight to JFK airport that was possible. The distress on her face must have been visible because the ground staff were cooperative and soon enough she was clutching a boarding pass in her clammy hand, waiting impatiently by the boarding gate.

The missed calls from her mother were piling up and her voicemails increased in size, even her stepfather attempted to call her, but Valerie ignored her phone. She was focused on only one thing and that was getting to New York City Hospital as fast as she could.

Things had been going so well for Andrew and his friends on the road. He had used the word ‘perfect’ to describe the world that he was currently experiencing, but Valerie would be the first person to tell you that perfection could mean perfect hell.

The plane seemed to sit on the boiling tarmac run way for what felt like an eternity. But once the plane had heaved itself into the sky the neat air stewardesses came down the aisle with the shaking silver trolleys and the clinking bottles. Valerie was tempted to ask for something strong that contained a generous dash of alcohol. Her nerves were already started to show, but she knew that she had to keep a clear head and so instead she had two black coffees and destroyed the complimentary sandwich that tasted like cardboard.

Despite having downed the two steaming cups of coffee she was exhausted. But sleep was the last thing that she wanted to do right now. She didn’t want to wake up in JFK unprepared. The minute she would set foot on the East coast soil her life would change. Nothing would stay the way it was before. Andrew wouldn’t be the same.

So she filled the voids that the time zones left with cheap coffee that came in flimsy paper cups, and the hours passed but she still counted the minutes until everything in her life changed.

She had never been to New York before. Andrew had been a couple of times already and each time when he returned home he had brought some gift with him. It was always of the tacky clique tourist ilk because that’s what Valerie loved. She already owned countless I heart NY shirts but had never actually set foot on a New York sidewalk. It was tragic that her first visit should be on such a sad note.

Manoeuvring her baggage trolley out of the airport and keeping Pepito on a short leash, she managed to flag down one of the first taxis and after throwing her dilapidated suitcase in the trunk she shouted the name of the hospital at the driver. New York literally flew past her; she wasn’t able to take in any of the sights. Pepito who was sat on her lap grew increasingly anxious as he felt Valerie’s worry and he started whining, searching for the comfort that Valerie couldn’t bring up at this point.

Once she reached the hospital she flung a twenty at the driver and before he could comprehend what was going on she was out of the taxi with her dog and suitcase. Pepito was hidden from the hospital staff’s eyes by being placed carefully in the carrier bag and after incessant demanding Valerie was given Andrew’s room number.

With her whole body shaking and her breath coming in short sharp bursts Valerie found herself stood on the 10th floor, her suitcase by her side and her dog clutched in her hands. Shifting the puppy she managed to free and hand with which she knocked on the door. She heard Andrew invite her in, and taking a deep breath she pulled the door open.