Amped Up: Why Is My Name Jason?

School droned on and on; it was as if the school day just wouldn’t end. I, of course, was not in the mood for this. All I really wanted to do was go home and find out how much trouble my father was in for ignoring me these past seventeen years. At three o’clock, I met up with Quinn and we headed back home. Quinn attempted to keep me from focusing on this, but it really wasn’t working that well. I sighed heavily and eyed my cousin. “Please, Quinn, I don’t want to hear this right now. Can’t it wait until later?” I asked him

“I guess, but…” Quinn started.

Wanting to get back home, I quickened the pace that I was walking (Garrett and Maddie had the car) and didn’t hear what my cousin said. Right now, all I wanted to do was get home and figure out how much trouble my father had gotten in for what he was doing. I didn’t deserve to be ignored like this. Just because Mom was dead because she wasn’t strong enough to give birth to all three of us didn’t give my father the right to ignore me. Why would I ever want that to happen? I didn’t deserve to be ignored by my father. Plus, the fans didn’t deserve to be denied the opportunity to hear the Jonas Brothers play Lovebug.

Once Quinn and I reached the house where we knew each of our fathers, Uncle Nick, Uncle Teddy, and Aunt Lizz were, I opened the door and found that Aunt Lizz was still lectured my father about what he was doing to me. Despite the fact that she was six years younger than my father, my aunt still felt the need to give him a lecture that seemed to last forever. I looked over at my uncles; they were busy talking amongst themselves while my father was getting lectured about how he was ignoring me for all the wrong reasons. “…do you even realize how upset your youngest son has been about all of this? I can tell you right now that you don’t. Jason is so much like you: he is musically inclined and, after hearing all the stories I’ve told him about Amanda, wants her to be alive,” Aunt Lizz said.

My father rolled his eyes. “Betsy,” he said addressing my aunt, “I can’t look at him without thinking of Mandolin. His tell is the same as hers. His hazel eyes change color just like his mother’s: forest green when he’s lying about something good, chocolate brown when it’s about something terrible. Every time it happens, I think of Mandolin.”

Aunt Lizz rolled her eyes. “Kevin, that’s still no excuse for you to ignore Jason. He doesn’t deserve that, no matter how much you may try to insist that he does.” She turned to face me. “Jason, please explain to your father what you told me. He needs to understand what’s been going on and how he’s only been focusing on Garrett and Madison.”

I rolled my eyes. Aunt Lizz was not making this any easier on me. Why did I have to confront my father about all of this? Personally, I would have preferred it if she was the one to tell him about this. Confronting my father about all of this was not something I was really in the mood to do. After all, my father was around me for maybe ten minutes out of the day; that was all he could stand. I groaned. “Sorry, Aunt Lizz, but I just can’t do that. After all the years that my father’s ignored me, I find it extremely hard to speak with my father.” With that, I stormed upstairs to my room and slammed the door. I really wasn’t sure of the fact that Aunt Lizz understood what was going on here; my father and I could barely talk about anything that was going on in my life, particularly not Mom. She was the touchiest subject in the world for Dad to talk about; I definitely couldn’t do this.

Once I got into my room, I glanced over at my mother’s mandolin which was sitting in the corner of my room. What was it about that mandolin that caused my father to want to forget me? Yeah sure, my mother’s name was Amanda Lynne, but my father just became so affected by her death. Refusing to play one of your own songs was completely stupid. “Hey, Jason,” I heard my aunt say from where she stood at the door, “I really do thinking that you should talk to your father about all of this. He needs to hear your side of the story in order to understand the reason that you need more attention from him. Of course, that can’t happen if you won’t talk to him about everything that’s been going on.”

“I know,” I said, “but I can’t.”

“Why not?” she asked.

“It’s probably not going to change anything. Dad will just continue to spend time with Maddie and Garrett, pushing me away,” I told her quoting one of my father’s songs to make point.

Aunt Lizz chuckled at my use of my father’s song. “Trust me, Jason. I will make sure of the fact that your father doesn’t continue to ignore you. Your mother would never have wanted that. Now, I think it’s best if I give you your birthday present right now; your father would kill me if he knew that I found and was giving you this.” She pulled something out from the lining of her jacket and smiled. “Around noon, while your father was in the other room, I was able to ask your Uncle Joe to get me a copy of the sheet music to Lovebug and the CD single. Joe would pretty much say yes to anything I ask, no matter what his older brother wanted him to do. So, I asked him to go get it for me in order to give you.”

I took the CD and sheet music from my aunt, but eyed her suspiciously. “How were you able to convince Uncle Joe to give this to you? I thought Dad didn’t want anyone to play the song while he was around. That would mean that he’d make sure that no else, particularly in his family would own a copy of this song and the sheet music for it,” I said.

She nodded. “That’s true. However, Joe and I have this weird friendship that stemmed from the moment I met him. See, even before your parents got together, I had always loved Joe. Unfortunately, any chance of me dating Joe was put away the moment your parents got engaged. I always harbored feelings for Joe though, despite that fact that we agreed not to date each other as it would be extremely awkward for us to be around each other if we dated and then broke up. Literally two weeks after the wedding, I found myself falling for Joe again. He found out and was able to help me get over this…by introducing me to Teddy. Of course, Joe swore that he would always love me, just as it is with me. As a result, despite the fact that I’m married to Teddy Geiger and he’s married to Kyra Clark, Joe and I will always have feelings for one another. That will never ever change.”

“Do Aunt Kyra and Uncle Teddy know about that?” I asked her curiously. That certainly seemed like something that would get on their nerves. If Aunt Lizz and Uncle Joe still had feelings for each other, it might end up ruining two marriages if their spouses found out. Now that would seem a little awkward. I would hate to see that end up happening to them.

“They know it means nothing,” she replied.

I sighed and put the CD in, but didn’t play it. For some reason, I just couldn’t. Not yet. “Aunt Lizz,” I said placing the sheet music under my pillow, “are you sure that my father won’t realize what you did? I wouldn’t want him to know that you helped me realize the one thing about my mother that he obviously wouldn’t have wanted me to know about.”

“It’ll be fine,” she said.

“I really don’t know,” I shrugged.

“Yeah, well, I do, Jason. I do. Your father has hid this from you for far too long and it’s time that Paul Kevin Jonas II took responsibility for his three children. Your father needs to understand that he can’t keep hiding from this. For seventeen long years, your father has focused on his music in order to keep himself from thinking of your mother; it gives him too many painful memories to hear Lovebug or even see that mandolin. The fact is that, of everyone of my side of the family, I was the only one your father would even come near. The only reason that even happened was because I was only sixteen at the time of your birth; with my still being a minor at the time of my sister’s death, it was your father that became my legal guardian. Of course, I had promised both him and my older sister that I would be here to help take care of you, Garrett, and Madison. That’s the reason that you, your father, and siblings ended up living in the same house as me, Uncle Teddy, and my kids; it was because of promise I made to your parents. Of course, I don’t want you to have to deal with anything like what your father had to deal with; no one should ever have to deal with becoming so emotional about something that you’re living with your sister-in-law and her family, not that I mind though.”

Though I still wasn’t sure about all of this, I followed my aunt downstairs. Of course, I warned her that there was absolutely no way in hell that I was going to talk to my father…at least not yet. Until I knew that my father was really going to spend time with me, I wasn’t going to speak with him about everything that had been going on. I went downstairs and found that Aunt Kyra and Aunt Selena had arrived to help celebrate us our birthdays; all we had to do was wait for Garrett and Madison to get back from school.