Amped Up: Why Is My Name Jason?

I was utterly confused by what was going on here. My mother was in the room. No, that’s wrong. It was her ghost. She was a ghost. I stared at my mother’s ghost for a moment; she looked exactly as she did in my dream three years ago. Her shoulder-length brown hair, the hazel eyes to match my own, the slim figure; that was exactly as I found her in my dream three years ago. “Mom, what are you doing here?” I asked quietly so that no one would know what I was doing. They’d all think I was crazy if they learned that my mother’s ghost was here. I didn’t want that to happen; no one was to know what was going on.

“Jason, I’ve been watching over you from the moment I died,” my mother said. “Ever since I died, I’ve watched over you, Garrett, and Madison to see how your father and my sister were raising.” She laughed. “Betsy was right. You were going to get called Voorhees. Of course, I never expected that it would be my own children that called you that. If I could, I would go have a little chat with them. Of course, since I can’t, I’ll talk to Betsy about it.”

Huh? “Mom, what are you talking about?” I asked.

“Oh yeah, you don’t know. Jason, I think you need to bring my sister up here. She’s the only one who can understand what you’re going through. Despite the fact that Nick, Joe, and your father from what I saw seventeen years ago after I died, all know the truth: only my sister will understand what’s going on here,” she told me. “After the party ends and all your aunts and Uncle Frankie are gone with the kids, bring Betsy up here. The two of us will then explain what’s been going on and why I’m here as a ghost. So, go to the party.”

I nodded and left the room. All throughout the remainder of the party, I couldn't help but think about my mother. How was her ghost upstairs in my room? Aunt Lizz definitely had some explaining to do. The funny thing was that it was right after I played Lovebug that my mother appeared. Why? Was that song connected to her? I apparently had to ask my aunt because she was supposedly the one who knew what was going on here. She was the only one.

The party ended an hour later so I went over to my aunt. “Um, Aunt Lizz, can we go up to my room and talk? Something happened that I need your help in understanding,” I told her.

“What is it?” she asked.

“I need to show you?” I told her.

We headed up to my room and, as soon as I opened the door to my room, Aunt Lizz’s jaw dropped. “Amanda, I thought you weren’t going to appear before Jason until his eighteenth birthday?” she asked walking into the room and taking a seat in the armchair.

I sat on my bed, utterly confused as to what was going on. Aunt Lizz knew! Aunt Lizz could see her all this time and she never told me! I couldn’t believe this. How could my aunt have kept this from me? She knew how much I would have liked to see my mom. So, why in the world did she hide all of this from me? “Mom, Aunt Lizz, what in the world is going on here? How is it that I have the ability to see my mother’s ghost and yet no one ever mentioned this to me? I wanted to know about this. I’ve spent seventeen long years upset over this and now I learn that I can actually see my mother’s ghost. Why was this hidden from me?”

“Jason, your mother was never supposed to appear until your eighteenth birthday. Then again, I didn’t even know that you were the one to possess this ability until just this morning,” Lizz said.

“Huh?” I asked.

Mom sighed. “Jason, there’s something you don’t exactly know about me or your aunt. You see, when our father died, it came immediately after I attempted to save him from dying. As a result, I had a bond with him. By Betsy’s fifteenth birthday, I was still kind of sullen over the fact that a part of me was buried with my father. Then, at the party, I began seeing my father’s ghost and was able to communicate with him up until the day I died.”

“Meanwhile, I ended up complaining over the fact that your mother could see our father’s ghost; I wanted to see him to, despite the fact that I hated him for saying that the Jonas Brothers was a terrible band. Unfortunately, Amanda always told me that I could never see my father; only she could. Instead, I would be able to see our mother’s ghost. Our mother died a day prior to Amanda’s wedding and I was able to remain in contact with her up until your mother died. Once Amanda died, all communication with our parents was cut off because, according to the letter she left me, it was your mother who would be watching over us. I, of course, was the only one who would be able to see her because of the ability I possessed to communicate with my mother. Not even your father can see Amanda, but then, that might end up changing if your father would just learn to accept that she’s dead and not hide from the song he refuses to play. The moment he agrees to play Lovebug again is the very same moment that Kevin will be able to see Amanda.”

I looked between my mother and my aunt. Suddenly, I realized something. “Aunt Lizz, were you talking to my mother during dinner? You seemed rather distracted,” I told her.

“Actually I was,” Aunt Lizz replied. “However, your mother never did mention that she intended on appearing before you tonight. Why didn’t you, Amanda? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Sorry, Bets. I just didn’t see the point in telling you when I knew that Jason would ask you about all of this. I mean, yeah, we told Nick and Joe on your fifteenth birthday and the day after I got back from my honeymoon, respectively, but they would never understand what was going on. The same is true with Kevin; despite the fact that you told him about our ability…or rather your ability at that point…he would never fully comprehend the nature of the situation until he was able to see me, something that he won’t do, even though it’s very possible for him to do. He just won’t play that song because of me,” my mother said. “You two have to convince him to play the song in order for me to show up before him. If he really wants to see me, he’s got to play the song.”

“He won’t listen,” I stated.

“Maybe not,” my mother said, “but you have to try. Your father doesn’t seem to realize that his refusal to play that song was the only thing stopping me from appearing before him. The moment he plays Lovebug is the very same moment that Kevin will be able to see me. So, try and figure out a way to convince your father to do this. Betsy, please help him.”

“Sure,” Aunt Lizz said.

While Mom disappeared, I turned to my aunt. “Why didn’t you tell me? I mean, I really wanted to know about the fact that you could see my mother’s ghost. How many times have I sat around and sulked over the fact that my mother was dead? I can tell you right now that it’s far too many for me to even count. You should have told me about this.”

“I know,” she said. “Of course, I wasn’t allowed to say anything until I knew for sure which of you three would inherit your mother’s ability. There was a possibility that Garrett or Madison could have inherited your mother’s ability to speak to ghosts. But then again, I guess I really should have suspected that you would be the one to possess your mother’s ability. When you were a baby, your mother came to speak with me while you were in my arms. At one point, I came to realize that you were staring up at the very place that your mother was. Now, I can’t really be sure, but I had suspected that you could see your mother.”

“Yeah well, you could have told me then,” I reminded her.

Aunt Lizz shook her head. “No. Your mother made me swear not to say anything about the ability I possessed to speak with ghost until you were at least fifteen. It was at that age that I first realized that your mother was speaking to our father. That was also how old I was when I first realized my own ability to communication with ghosts. Amanda didn’t think you were old enough to understand what was going on until you reached the same age I did when I learned about what was going on. So, I was forced to wait. By that time, I had completely forgotten about the fact that you were around during the first encounter I had with Amanda’s ghost. So, I really couldn’t have told you about this, Jason.”

We continued talking for awhile, but it eventually ended when Aunt Lizz had to go. So, I just sat there trying to figure out why my mother hadn’t appeared before me prior to this. If she was watching over me for seventeen years, she should have known that I wanted to see her; I was always the one sulking over this. She knew, but never revealed herself. I sighed and was about to go to bed when Garrett came in. “Voorhees, why in the world are you up here? You should be downstairs with me and Maddie,” he said.

“Shut up, General Motors!” I yelled. When Garrett started calling me Voorhees, I started calling him General Motors since his full name is Garrett Matthew Jonas. General Motors was the only nickname I could think of for my older brother to annoy him since it was a car company. Madison, one the other hand, was a different story. Her full name Madison Grace Jonas provided me with no derogatory nickname for her; she was just Maddie. “I don’t want to hear what you have to say. And stop calling me Voorhees! You know I hate it.”

“But that’s why we call you it,” Madison said appearing at Garrett’s side. “We know how much you hate being referred to as Voorhees so we call you that. Maybe if you weren’t so bothered by this, Garrett and I wouldn’t end up calling you this. Just remember that.”

I grimaced. She was right. If this didn’t bother me so much, I would have to hear my siblings call me Voorhees. Mom, why can’t you go visit Garrett or Maddie? They need to understand that I truly do despise being referred to as Voorhees. That was the reason I hated my name. Why in the world did I have to be named Jason? “Maybe so!” I yelled at them angrily. “Of course, if Mom were alive, she wouldn’t be letting you call me Voorhees. The only reason you’ve been able to do so in the past is because Dad doesn’t care and Aunt Lizzie hasn’t caught you enough times to punish you for calling me that.”

“Damn straight!” I heard my mother exclaim.

“Whatever!” they grumbled.

After they walked away, I laid on my bed and attempted to sleep. I couldn’t. So, I went downstairs and grabbed a movie from off the shelf. When I saw what movie I had pulled, I had to laugh. It was a movie called God Save the Queen; the movie version of a book published a little over seventeen years ago. I remember first reading this book when I was about eight years-old, not because it was for school or anything, but rather because this book was written by my mother. One day while I was looking for something Aunt Lizz wanted, I found the book and, upon realizing that my mother was the one to write this book, sat down to read it.

Aunt Lizz walked in on me that day and explained to me how that book was the only thing that my mother was ever known for…at least during her life. About two years afterward, when Aunt Lizz realized that my mother’s book had become so popular, she contacted my mother’s old agent in order to publish the sequel that was written. Apparently, my mother had finished the sequel, but never had it published. Within a month of Mom’s death, Aunt Lizz found the manuscript and began editing it so that it could be published. It took about a year to do so, but my aunt was able to finish it and send it off to my mom’s agent, requesting that when the book was published, the author’s name be listed as Amanda Jonas, just as God Save the Queen was. Its sequel, Time Turners, was published on my second birthday in honor of what had happened to my mother.

Both books were popular and pretty soon, there was a director who wished to make a movie of God Save the Queen. Aunt Lizz (who had all control over the novels from the moment my mother died) agreed to let the movie be made, but under only one condition: Garrett, Madison, and I were to be cast in the movie; we were fifteen at the time. It was agreed that the three of us would star in the movie with Madison as the lead girl, Alia, while Garrett and I played feuding twin brothers (uh, not that hard!), Parker and Peyton, respectively. Looking back on it now, I think it was kind of funny in the way that Garrett and I were cast because, in the story, Peyton was the football player; Garrett should have been the one playing Peyton, not Parker as he was cast as. But, that was life. Things don’t always turn out as you want them to; I should know. Just take a look at my life.

As I sat around watching the movie in my bedroom, my thoughts turned to my aunt. It was actually the book and movie that caused me to call my aunt as such. Prior to when I read that book, I called her Aunt Lizzie. Of course, when I came to realize that the character of Lizz that was written into my mother’s story had been based on my aunt, the ie had been dropped. Aunt Lizzie became Aunt Lizz. She never actually mentioned it, but I could tell that she was not that fond of it. The first time I called her that, I could see it in her eyes that she was not thrilled by the fact that I was calling her that. She came to accept the fact that I was the only one who would ever be calling that; Garrett and Maddie both still called her Aunt Lizzie. I’m the only one to call her Lizz because I’m the only one who came to realize that my mother had intentionally created a character based on her sister.

Once the movie ended, I sighed and went to bed. I needed to get my mind off father and what he was doing. Plus, the fact that my mother’s ghost had just recently appeared before me didn’t help that much. Today was the weirdest birthday I ever had and I just wanted to forget parts of it, namely the parts that my father had been ignoring me.