Inclined to Recline

He cocked his eyebrow in response, but didn’t speak. Neither did I to start with, I just continued to look at him; his eyes displayed all of the emotions I wanted to see just months ago, guilt, love and happiness at being with me, but now just made me feel even worse so I turned my gaze away from him.

“Emma?” He asked.

I bit my lip as he moved his head so that it was directly in front of my gaze again. Closing my eyes for a second, I breathed in deeply to calm myself, and then opened them slowly, “I-”

“Emma!” I spun around as I heard someone shouting my name, and then saw Julia pushing her way through the crowd. I glared at her, and she cast me an apologetic look for interrupting me, although for a different reason than she thought. “I think you should come,”

I frowned, letting her grab my hand and pull me away from the dance floor, and away from Nick again. “Where? Where’s Joe?” I asked, noticing he wasn’t glued to her as he usually was.

“Urm,” She was still dragging me out of the crowd, Nick following closely behind us, “Following Toby.”

I stopped in my tracks, staring at her in confusion, as I realised we were heading back out of the venue, “Why? Where has he gone?”

She turned to look at Nick, who just stared back stubbornly, so she glared at him and then sighed, “I don’t know where he’s gone, but Joe was talking to him about possibly getting him and Tyler to play with them on the last show of this tour, to get their name out there, you know? Well, he seemed really up for the idea and happy and everything, and then he saw something,” She raised her eyebrows at the pair of us, her eyes lingering longer on mine, trying to get some hidden message telepathically from me. I broke eye contact and she continued, “And then he just slammed the drinks down he’d just bought on the bar, and stormed off out. Joe was chasing after him when I came to get you,”

I frowned, glancing around as my ears got used to the quietness that now surrounded us since we were on the street. There were still people outside the venue; fans waiting to meet their favourite celebrities that were inside, and paparazzi hoping to find the same celebrities stumbling out of the party drunk or in some other news-worthy condition.

I strolled out of the doors, ahead of Julia now, and the crowd started screaming, the paparazzi yelling questions at us like “Julia, where has Joe gone? Are you two fighting? Emma, are you and the blonde boy dating now?” We ignored the questions and smiled at the fans lined up that were shouting at them to shut up, but they lost interest in us anyway as soon as they realised Nick was behind us, both the paparazzi and most of the crowd surrounding us.

A few of the quieter fans were still shouting at Julia and me to go over. I smiled over apologetically, promising that I would return soon, and then Julia pointed down the direction she assumed Toby and Joe had gone, and then was swept up by fans wanting pictures and asking questions. I smirked and then took off down the street quickly before anyone could follow me.

I turned a corner at the sound of Joe’s voice, but I stayed hidden in the shadows so that I could listen, “Come on Toby, you’re being ridiculous and causing a scene. What’s wrong? I can’t help you if you don’t tell me!”

I heard a thump and winced, guessing that Toby had just punched a wall. Sure enough, when he spoke I could hear the pain in his voice, “You can’t help Joe. The only way you can help is by taking yourself and your stupid brothers and keeping away from Emma!”

“What the hell? What is that supposed to mean?”

I sighed, “I’ve got this Joe,” I said as I stepped out and moved closer towards them. Joe nodded and stepped towards me. I smiled as he hugged me. “I’ll be fine,” I assured him.

He rubbed my back and then exhaled deeply, whispering, “Just be careful. I don’t know what’s wrong with him but he seems really angry-”

“He won’t hurt me Joe,”

He shrugged, “I know he won’t, not physically, but you have been through a lot and I don’t want him upsetting you. I’ll wait around the corner in case you need me,”

I shook my head, “No it’s fine. Julia and Nick are battling the fans and paparazzi alone; they need you more than I do, Mister!” I laughed shakily, “Besides I think we need to talk alone,”

He nodded, and then sighed, “Emma, are you and Toby...you know..?”

“No,” I shook my head, and then cursed myself mentally for replying so fast. Joe noticed and raised his eyebrows, “Not really, I don’t know, just...look I’ll tell you everything later okay?” He nodded, hugged me again and then left, leaving me to face Toby and whatever it was that had happened in there to make him so mad. I let my breath out deeply, and then I turned my gaze on him sternly, “What’s happened?”

He glared at me, “Nothing,”

“Toby,” I laughed uncertainly, “I know you, remember? You’re my best friend, and I know when something is wrong with you,”

“Well maybe that is the problem,”

I pulled my eyebrows together in confusion, “You don’t like the fact that I know you pretty well?”

He rolled his eyes, “Not that,” He shook his head, “For fuck sake Emma, do I mean anything to you?”

I gulped, “Yes, of course you do,”

“It doesn’t look like that from where I’m standing,” He wasn’t looking at me anymore, but I remained silent until he continued to speak, “He hurt you, he hurt you really bad Emma and it was me that was there to pick up the pieces. And now it’s me that has to sit and watch you fall for him all over again.”

“Toby I-”

He turned another glare on me, “Don’t, okay? I’m sick of listening to it,”

I bit my lip and toyed with the bag that was in my hand. When I looked at him again, I made sure to catch his eye, to show that I wasn’t going to feel guilty for anything that I had, or in this case hadn’t, done. “Toby, I told you when that...”

“Our kiss,”

“Fine,” I snapped, “I told you when we kissed that I didn’t know what I wanted to come from it, if anything, and you said you understood that! But if you can’t handle that then-”

“Then what?!” We locked eyes in a stare, and finally my shoulders slumped in defeat, and he smirked slightly, it was just a flash of his smile but I saw it, “I just don’t want to see you get hurt again, Emma,”

I stepped closer to him, “And yourself,”

He rolled his eyes, the last of his anger escaping from him now as he moved even closer to me and pulled me up in a hug, “That doesn’t even matter as long as you’re happy, because ultimately that’s all I want, and I honestly don’t believe he can make you happy,”

“But he does make me happy, T,” I sighed, “We were friends before we dated, best friends, and I don’t want to lose that. I don’t want to lose you either, so please don’t make me choose.” I felt him stiffen against me and I braced myself against another Hemingway explosion. When it didn’t come, I looked up tentatively, and then cursed mentally as I heard footsteps close by, Julia’s voice telling to someone to slow down.

Not someone...Nick.

“For fuck sake,” I cursed, turning around as Nick came closer towards me, Julia behind him with Joe behind her.

Julia glanced at me apologetically, mouthing ‘I tried’ and I nodded in response. Nick didn’t say anything, just glanced from me to Toby’s arms that were still wrapped around me, back to me again. Toby cleared his throat, and I could tell his patience was wearing thin. If I didn’t say something soon, then he would, and it wouldn’t be pretty. The problem was that I didn’t know what to say.

Joe did it for me though, when he stuffed his hands in his pockets, swayed on his feet, and then muttered, “Awkward,”

I silently agreed, and then stepped away from Toby. Julia came forward and put a comforting arm around me, glaring between Toby and Nick, as if daring either of them to try and come any closer to me. Neither of them did.

I looked at Julia, in the hopes of her sending me some sign of what to do. She just shrugged. I felt myself deflate even further, and we remained silent. Toby was the one who spoke first, “So I’m guessing he knows now?” He asked.

I opened my mouth to reply, but Nick’s expression hardened, “Knows what?” He demanded and I panicked.

“Emma?” Toby said.

“I-” I started, but then my shoulders slumped, defeated. Toby smirked and I locked eyes with him, “Toby please,”

“Please what?” He asked, “Oh, please don’t tell him that you kissed me? Okay...oops,”

Julia and Joe both simultaneously glared at him, “You bastard,” Julia snapped. I couldn’t even look at Nick. I was going to tell him, I knew he had to find out, but I wanted to be the one to tell him. Now I couldn’t. Toby had made it worse.

I felt tears form in my eyes, and Julia noticed. She squeezed my arm and whispered, “Not now,” I sniffed and fought them back, turning to look at Nick. He looked hurt, but not shocked. And that is what was most painful. After everything I’d said and done to him for what happened with Miley...he expected me to do the same thing with Toby, but he hadn’t said a word.

He turned around and took off out of the street, turning in the opposite direction of the party when he reached the end. I made a move to follow him, but Julia stopped me and Joe followed him. Toby wasn’t far behind them, but he headed in the direction of our car.

When there was only me and Julia in the street, I let the tears fall freely, and she didn’t say a word. She just tightened her arms around me, letting me cry on her shoulder and get make up all over her white cardigan, although she assured me that it was fine when I pointed this out.

“Come on,” She offered finally, “Let’s go,”

I shook my head, “Toby took the car,”

She smiled, “You’re staying with me tonight sweetie, and Joe can stay with Nick. We’re going to have a pig out and watch movies, okay?” I nodded and let her lead me towards her car. “Hey, we can watch One Tree Hill. Their lives are so shit; it might help you forget about your own problems.”