Pure Morning

2

"Jenna, you know we still haven't technically gotten permission to go to that festival," Josie said as she thoughtfully stared at the tickets.

"Oh well. I got them, didn't I?" Jenna said with a cocky tone.

She sprawled herself out on her bed and quietly chuckled to herself. She always felt empowered when having accomplished something that was technically forbidden. She felt it gave her an air of power and confidence.

"I don't know," Josie suddenly said, placing the tickets near Jenna on the bed.

"What do you mean, you don't know?" she said and sat up, eyes following Josie as she thoughtfully paced back and forth.

"I don't think we should go. You know Mom wouldn't want us to. Well, she wouldn't want you to, that's for sure."

"Well I'm going no matter what. I worked way too hard to obtain these damn tickets. There's no way in Hell I'm letting the opportunity of a lifetime slip away. Are you crazy?" she said in disbelief.

"No, I'm a realist; an entirely different thing. I just know we'd get ourselves into big problems if we went," she said and nodded.

"Well, it's not like the ticket has your name on it."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You don't have to go with me. I can always tag wiL along," she said and bent down, placing the tickets in a small box under her bed.

"wiL? No. Definitely not him. Besides, I do want to go. It's just that I don't think we should. It'll just cause all sorts of problems that--"

"Do you want to see Placebo or not?" Jenna sternly shot out.

"Yes, I want to see them but--"

"But, nothing! We're going, okay? So stop with your annoying, pessimistic ranting."

"Question," Josie started and looked towards Jenna with concern.

"What?"

"How did you get those tickets?"

"Well I have them, don't I? That's all that matters," she dryly responded and pulled a cigarette out of the box next to her bed.

"Well, you did say you worked hard to get them. I just want to know, that's all."

"Just know that it wasn't easy for me and that we have to go. Because after working so hard to get them, it would be fucking stupid not to go. There, now don't ask me anything else," she said in between puffs of smoke.

"Stop smoking. You're like a damn chimney. Don't you ever think about anyone besides yourself?" Josie said in disbelief.

"Why, because I'm having a smoke? Hand me that ashtray, will you?"

"No, I'm not handing you anything. I just want to know how you got those tickets. Tell me already, damn it!"

"You know, that's actually my personal business. All you have to do, is mind your stuff, and go to the show. No questions asked. Just trust me, okay?" she scoffed and crushed the cigarette against the ashtray across the room.

"No offense, but you're just a hard person to trust. Look, whatever it is you did to get the tickets, don't do it ever again. I know it must have been bad, because knowing you--"

"Knowing me, what? What are you insinuating?"

"Nothing. You know what it is you did. I won't bother you about it anymore. When is the festival again?" Josie curiously questioned, a small grin forming on her lips.

"Now you're interested?" Jenna said and smugly rolled her eyes.

"I was interested to begin with. Just tell me."

"In three days. Man, I don't think I can wait that long! Maybe we can meet them and I can, you know..." Jenna hinted and suggestively winked.

"You're not going to do anything. We're just going to the show to enjoy ourselves. Not to act slutty, got it?" Josie warned and pointed a finger at her.

"Hey, you said enjoy ourselves. That's exactly what I plan on doing."

"You'll never change, will you? You'd think that case of mono you had not long ago would have done something, but no; you're still the same cocky, self-absorbed girl as always," Josie sighed in defeat.

"Don't even remind me of that. It was horrible. Always ruining my moments of joy with something negative. You're such a pessimist."

"Whatever. I'm leaving. Night," she said and stormed out, slamming the door shut.

"Fuck you then. I go and get you tickets and that's how you thank me!" Jenna yelled in response as she walked up to the closed door, locking it.

She then jumped, landing flat against the bed, staring at the ceiling in thought. Her sister always tried to bring her down when she was in a good mood. It would usually work, too. But this time, Jenna was not going to let anything bring her down. Not during these days, at least. She was feeling much too happy to think negatively. She lay, slightly grimacing at the thought of setting foot out of her room. She knew her Mom was disappointed and the mere thought nearly killed her. She hated being the cause of her Mom's disappointment. She could care less if she disappointed her Father; he didn't genuinely care about her anyway. She decided she would stay in her room all night. At least until the morning came and forced her to open the door. She didn't even feel like talking to anyone. Not even wiL. Especially after the way he had rejected her earlier. It was almost as if he didn't want her. At least that's what it seemed like to her. All she wanted, was to be alone. To be able to stare at the tickets all night long. And smoke. Yes, the only two things that comforted her at this point...

"What the Hell are you doing here?" Jenna sternly asked as she peered her head through the car door.

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm going to take you to school. Get in," wiL said and rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"What if I don't want to? I'm still pissed at you for what you did yesterday."

"And what is it I did, according to you?" he sarcastically said.

"You pretty much fuckin' rejected me. You know how much that sets me off," she angrily muttered as she looked around.

"Don't want anyone to see you. Leave."

"I'm not leaving without you. Get in the damn car already. Look, I'm sorry about yesterday, but I just didn't want you to receive shit from your parents. I really care about you. So get in, will you? Don't want your folks to see me. Plus, I have some Placebo in the car," he said and gave her a wide smile.

She couldn't resist wiL, she knew that much. She loved treating him like shit, but at the same time she felt he had a great hold on her. She was crazy about him.

"Fine, whatever. You said Placebo and that's what got me," she chuckled and stepped inside the car.

"Good, now we can finally leave," he muttered and turned the volume up.

"Ah, Special K!" Jenna excitedly exclaimed.

"Uh-huh. Pretty much your favourite Placebo song, isn't it?" he said with a suggestive smirk.

"Yeah, pretty much. Though you know I love all."

"Yep. I'm playing it for a reason, though."

"Because I like it, right?"

"Yeah, that too. But for another reason."

"Okay, stop going around in circles and tell me," Jenna scoffed and gave an irritable nod.

"What would you say if I told you I have some in my possession?" wiL said as he looked directly towards the road.

"Have some what? What do you have up your sleeve?" Jenna questioned as she felt a grin trace the corners of her lips.

"Hold on. I have to stop somewhere discreet," he lowly muttered as he kept driving.

Jenna felt herself steadily get more excited as the minutes passed. She loved wiL's surprises. They usually meant taking some sort of risk and the thought alone enticed her.

"Alright. No one will see us around here," he said while looking around cautiously.

"I thought you were taking me to school," Jenna sarcastically said and gave him a playful shove.

"And I am. But I knew you were upset yesterday and I thought I could make it up to you now," he said as a rummaged through a gray duffel bag.

"Well, it better be something big and worth my time because if you think you can just--"

She stopped mid sentence as soon as she saw what it was he had pulled out from the bag. She eyed the syringe in his hand with wonder as he smugly held it toward her.

"What the Hell is that?" She said and roughly snatched it from his hand.

"What do you think?"

"You tell me," she said and continued curiously eying the clear fluid inside the syringe.

"It's Special K. Why else would I have played the song especially for you?"

"Where did you get this?"

"Not telling you. It took me a while and was definitely not easy to acquire. So use it wisely," he said with an arrogant smile.

Jenna remained staring straight into the fluid-filled tube. She had never seen what Ketamine really looked like up until this point. She really didn't consider herself an avid drug user and wasn't even sure she wanted to start being one. The only drugs she had ever really done with frequency were marijuana and alcohol. There was one instance of cocaine, but that was only once and she didn't recall enjoying it very much. She then started thinking about how irritated her nose and eyes remained for the longest time afterward. Not only that, the fact her Mom had witnessed her behaviour was something Jenna still hadn't forgiven herself for. Just the way she--

"So are you gonna try it out or not? Or would you rather stare at it?" wiL suddenly shot out.

"Fuck you. I'm just looking at it, gosh. I don't even know how to use this. Have you used it before?" she curiously questioned.

"Yeah, a couple times. I wouldn't be giving it to you if I hadn't. Just try it out."

"But where do I inject this shit? I really don't know anything about it," she said and handed him the syringe.

"Give me your leg," he said and extended his arm toward her.

"My leg? What for?"

"Just do it," he muttered and snapped the cap off with his teeth.

She stared at him, not quite knowing what to do next. Did she really want to start using Special K? Maybe just one time wouldn't hurt. It wouldn't be enough to become an addict. Plus, she always enjoyed trying new things.

"Whatever, here," she muttered and extended her leg, setting it down on his lap.

He pressed at the bottom of the syringe lightly, causing a few drops to sprinkle out and land on her leg.

"Okay, I'm gonna need you to roll your jean up," he said and tapped the side of the tube with his finger.

"Fine, but hurry. I'm gonna be super late," she said and began rolling it up.

"How late?" wiL muttered.

"Pretty late. It's already 7:45. I get in at 8:00. Gosh, wiL," she said and hesitantly placed her leg back on top of his lap.

"Well at least you have a damn ride. So stop bitching. Okay. Ready?" He said with a sly grin.

"Not really. But whatever. Just do it already," she said, her eyes pressed shut.

She held her breath as she waited to feel the needle go in. She really wasn't sure what to expect. She suddenly felt wiL's grip wind tight around her calf until it felt like he was pinching.

"Shit, stop pinching so hard," she whispered and tightened her lids even more.

"Have to do it, babe. Just hold on a sec. Won't take long at all."

"Damn it!" she yelled as soon as she felt the sharp stinging sensation of the needle entering her skin, followed by a dull, numbing sensation.

Her leg began tingling, progressively losing feeling and she felt her head slightly tilt back. She slowly opened her eyes and saw wiL slowly pull the needle out, causing her to slightly flinch.

"There, all done. That wasn't so bad, now was it?" he mockingly said and let out a low chuckle.

"Uh, no. Not... so bad," she muttered and looked around.

"wiL, what's that butterfly doing over your head? Give it to me!"

"Ha, it's happening. There's no butterfly over my head. You're hallucinating. Usually happens within the first minute or so after injecting. Relax, doll."

"Stop the car. I feel like I'm gonna hurl," she said and began to roll the window down.

"Whoa, stop it. You're gonna fall out of the damn car," he said and pulled her back in by the leg.

"Hey, calm down. The hallucinating will stop soon. Just give it another minute. And whatever you do, please don't hurl in here. I just vacuumed this car two days ago. Found so many ashes, wow. So yeah, are you feeling better?" he asked and held her chin up to eye level.

"Your pupils are getting sort of dilated. Damn. Maybe I should have administered less."

"How much did you inject?" Jenna asked and shook her head away from his grip.

"About 100 mg. Milliliters, I should say since it's liquid. But it's really not that big of a dose at all. I just don't want you to be completely trashed at school."

"Then don't take me. Gosh, I feel like a balloon," she said and lightly tugged on his sleeve.

"Well you missed school yesterday. I'm thinking you should go. It won't be such a drag to be there since you're feeling better. Plus I don't want your absences to be obvious, you know?"

"But I feel way too great to go to that shit hole. Don't make me go!" she exclaimed and started hopping up and down in her seat.

"I'm taking you. But I'm also gonna pick you up after school so we can fool around, maybe get loaded on some more Special K. Sound fair?" he said and kissed her forehead.

"Uh-huh, fine. Hurry up and drive then. I want to get out of this car and jump around, or something."

Before she even felt time pass by, they were in front of the school campus. She immediately flung the car door open without saying a word and stumbled out. She felt great and as if she were walking through air. She suspected Special K would end up becoming a big part of her life. If she let it, that is.