Here, Here, and Here

“Mmhmm” I sigh. I kept my eyes closed as I woke up a bit. I pressed my forehead into Tom’s bare chest and curled my shoulders in. I felt his hand stroke my hair and his chin rested on top my head.

“You’re bipolar I swear” he whispered into my hair which was a mess.

“No, just a really good actress” I say. With my forehead resting against his throat I could feel him laugh. All of a sudden I remember Keevie. I shoot up and thankfully the blanket stayed around my chest.

“Keevie!!” I shout.

“Relax, Bill kinda guessed what happened” Tom smirked at this, “and he hung out in your room all night.” He reached over behind me, his arm grazing my lower back sending shivers up my spine, and grabbed his cell phone off the side table, “Bill left a message. Here, listen.”

As I listened to Bill’s message I felt the bed shift and I also felt a chill blow through the room from the open window so I pulled the blanket tighter around myself. The message ended and I felt relieved knowing that Keevie was taken care of last night. I turn around and find Tom shirtless but now wearing sweat pants. I wrap the thin blanket around me like I would a towel and stood up. I walked around the room for a bit and then I stopped in front of Tom’s suitcase. I grabbed a pair of his boxers and one of his super large t-shirts.

“What are you doing?” he asked leaning against the headboard.

“Getting dressed . . . well kind of” I say. I slip on the t-shirt with the blanket still around me and then I let it fall as the shirt settles at my mid-thigh. Then I step into his boxers and walk over with a little saunter. “So how do I stack up?” I ask.

“Let’s see, I haven’t had any that good in about . . .” he pauses and I sit down on the bed next to him, “four years.” He smirks and rubs my left shoulder with his fingers.

“Is that supposed to make me feel good about myself?” I joke.

“Maybe” he said and for a minute we just sat there and I knew he was thinking about something. And I knew when he was done thinking about it he would ask me about it.

“What do you want to ask me?”

“Where does this leave us?” he asked looking at the ceiling.

“A working progress” I supply not really knowing what we are.

“What about Caoimhe, what are we gonna tell her? When are we gonna tell her?” he persisted.

“I don’t know Tom, just not yet.” I stumble.

“Why?”

“Because . . . I’m not ready, she’s not ready, they’re not ready” I say slightly looking up at him.

“Who’s they? Georg and Gustav?” he wonders sitting up to look me in the eye.

“No, the media, your fans, your producers!”

“Wait, is that why you didn’t tell me when you first got pregnant?”

I hesitate to answer him, “I knew that if I told you you would have stayed and quit your music for me. I couldn’t let you do that. You were and still are too good, Tokio Hotel’s too good and I couldn’t let you disappoint your brother and your band like that. And I couldn’t let you disappoint me like that.”

I looked at the clock and saw that it was ‘oh shit’ time we were leaving for our flight to Rome soon and I needed to get Keevie ready and make sure everything else went right.

“We have got to get ready and I have to go” I say standing up, “Where are my clothes?”

“Never mind” I say as I step on something soaking wet. The shower really did a number on my clothes, “Jeez they’re sopping.”

“Okay then wear my clothes till you get back to your room” Tom says like a total guy.

“Yeah, I’m gonna walk through a hotel in Tom Kaulitz’s boxers and t-shirt like that’s not gonna start a media frenzy.”

“Like they’re gonna know they’re mine” he say still sounding like a total guy.

“Even so it would still be embarrassing” I say and look around, “I guess I’ll take the stairs.”

“Yeah, I thought so” he says and I walk out the door.