Lust.

The only thing I vividly remembered from Lilah's back to school party was the half hour that I spent trying to get away from it.

I was on the verge of being drunk and I didn’t know how I’d gotten that way. All I knew was that it was Friday night somewhere around eleven, and I was nearly stumbling away from the house with a bottle of gin in my hand. If I were sensible at the moment, I would have known that I was making a horrible impression on the neighbors, and perhaps a bad reputation for myself. I imagined that word traveled fast in a town such as Purshing.

“What the hell are you doing out here, Ella?”

Yelling. It came from somewhere across the lawn, but I didn’t care too much for it. My head was starting to ache because I wasn’t used to actually drinking. I should have thought twice before letting Lilah bring me to some dumb back to school party.

“Ella, are you okay?” It was Hawley.

“Geez, you’re so persistent, Hawley. I’m j-just getting a breath of fresh air,” I rolled my eyes and continued away from the house. “It’s so loud in there.”

“Yeah, that’s just like my sister to bring you to a party like this on your first weekend. You’re not... intoxicated are you?” He asked, eyes shifting down to my hand, “Oh my God, she gave you gin. How many drinks have you had of that? I’m not letting you back in the house.”

“Oh just two. Or maybe three. I swear I’m not drunk,” I sighed and pitched the bottle into the bushes beside the house. “I’m getting there though.”

I felt horrible for a fraction of a moment. I didn’t want to come across like that to Hawley at all. What if he thought of me differently because I was willing to go to a party and almost get trashed within a few days of moving to Purshing? I wasn’t that type of girl, but the opportunity had presented itself in the form of something that I’d mistaken for a bottle of spring water that Lilah had described. It’s not like I went to the party looking to do that. My thoughts were scrambled.

“Look, come across the street with me. We can sit there while you get your head on straight,” He faintly smiled. I could still hear the loud music blaring in the distance with a few people singing along due to the open windows. However, as we neared the edge of the yard, I began to hear the crickets chirping and I felt a cool breeze nipping at the apples of my cheeks.

“You’re too good, you know that?” I pressed my lips together pleasantly. He raised his eyebrow.

We reached the street a few seconds later and all had gone completely silent. I figured that it was due to the spacing that the houses had from each other and the consideration that the land developers had taken in keeping them as far away from the street as they possibly could. Just across the road was a large field that looked like it ran on for miles. The tall grass rustled in the wind and there were small white daisies that seemed to pepper the landscape.

“This is one of my favorite spots, you know,” Hawley spoke up after a few moments of silence, “I come here a lot to do my schoolwork and read on the history of this town. But, I’ve never been out here at night.”

I stopped walking and plopped down on a patch of grass partly into the field.

“It seems like a good place for that. And for stargazing,” I commented, looking up into the night sky. The stars shone brightly through the retreating clouds that seemed to be headed back to the north. I wound my hair around my finger a few times carelessly.

“Yeah,” Was all he said.

We just sat there in silence for a few minutes. I alternated between putting my head between my knees and staring up at the night sky, listening to the constant whispering of the wind and the hum of cars that passed every now and then. My mind seemed to clear easily in the damp air. I turned around to see a car slowly pass and pull over to the side of the road, and a young looking couple got out. They seemed to be arguing.

“You know, I read up on a few places that we should go tomorrow, and I think I found one in particular that may help us a lot with what we’re looking for,” Hawley said, disregarding the people that had pulled over. My eyes had transfixed on them for a few moments because one of them seemed oddly familiar. I held up my hand for him to stay quiet.

“...we’re not going through this again, are we?” The young man sounded agitated.

“Seriously, Oliver? Are you going to ask me that question again? How can you even ask that question? You know, it’s not easy living on our salaries. I’ve got a job working down at the diner because no one in this town will have me and you can do anything and you teach a bunch of little twits art?” My eyes widened. “We need to start thinking about a family!”

“For heaven’s sake, Julia, I’m only twenty-three! You’re twenty-five. We’ve got a long way to go and I love teaching. And maybe no one in this town will have you working for them because of the attitude you’ve displayed to everyone that you’ve come across!” It was Mr. Whiting.

I turned to look at Hawley. He too, had begun to stare at them with wide eyes.

“Hey, I think I’m sobering up now,” I whispered, giving him a sort of half-smile.

“By watching your advanced art teacher argue with his wife on the side of the road?” He returned, shifting his eyes away from the scene. I could see them getting back in the car finally, speeding down the road in the opposite direction.

“Uh-huh,” I nodded.

So, it was confirmed. Mr. Whiting, no, Oliver, did have marriage troubles.

I instantly thought about seeing him again next week.

“Listen,” Hawley started, touching my shoulder, “like I was saying, tomorrow we’re going to meet in front of the Purshing Coffee Company, okay?”

“Okay,” I agreed, picking myself up off the ground.

“And go home and take some asprin before you end up all angry tomorrow because Lilah got you drunk!” He grinned.

“What? How do you-?”

“When Lilah’s drunk, the water and the gin on the fridge shelf always get mixed up in her mind.”

That night, I concluded that Purshing was too small for anyone's own good.