Learn From Cigarette Burns

I laughed softly to myself as John did a little dance around the living room, holding Penelope carefully in his arms. The silly song he was making up as he went along caused Penelope to look up at him with wide eyes, and his dance was reason enough for Darren to watch his father in wonder.

“Come on, mama,” John smiled, “dance with us.”

“I can’t dance,” I laughed, “my legs are broken. You broke them when tackled me onto the ground earlier!”

John danced his way over to the couch where I was sitting and held his hand out to mine. “You were trying to make a fast getaway with my comfiest shorts,” he grinned as he waited, “no way were you going to get away with that, Mama O’Callaghan.”

“Point is they’re broken,” I giggled, “now get away from me.”

John raised his eyebrows, belted out a few more lines for his ridiculous song, and then moved his outstretched hand closer to me. I could help but burst into a fit of laughter as his ridiculous song got even more ridiculous.

“Get outta here,” I insisted with a smile as I playfully kicked his hand away from me.

“Party pooper!” John accused before he went back into the middle of the living room, making up a few more dance moves.

Penelope, who hadn’t been quite sure of what to make of her dad, finally smiled as she rested her head against his shoulder, her little fists clenching tightly to his shirt as if to keep herself steady. John and Penelope were joined shortly by Stitch, who bound and leapt around them, yipping happily. Seeing their new company, John kneeled down and decided a special verse to Stitch before he turned his focus back to me.

Knowing that the show wasn’t going to stop until I got up and danced, I took Darren in my arms and joined in on the party. John let out a small yell of triumph and then took my hand in his, leading me into a silly dance that I could not even begin to describe, even if I wanted to. Sometime later, after taking our time to catch our breaths from laughing too much, I handed our son off to John and collapsed onto the couch.

With a smile on my face, I watched my childhood sweetheart dance around the living room with our son and daughter held close to his body by each of his arms. I sighed softly and felt my eyes start to glaze over with the threat of tears. I looked away from the sight before me to wipe away the tears that had sudden fallen.

“Dee?” John asked quietly.

I looked up and realized that he was kneeled in front of me, our children still held tightly in his arms. All three pairs of looked at me, and I wiped away the last of the tears with a small smile.

“Sweetheart,” John asked sadly, “what’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong,” I whispered softly, “you guys are all so beautiful.” I told him. “They’re happy tears.”

“Oh, babe,” John muttered gently, “come here.”

I obliged and leaned forward, letting my husband kiss me. I cupped his face in my hands, not wanting him to stop the kiss anytime soon. He didn’t protest, and he kissed me until the house phone started ringing in the background.

“Hurry,” he mumbled as he stood up, allowing for me to answer the phone.

Since my feet knew their way through the living room by heart, I kept my eyes on John as he rocked our kids in time to a much, much slower beat. I saw his lips moving so I knew that he was singing yet another song, probably a sweet lullaby this time, but I couldn’t hear anything from where I was.

“Hello?” I answered.

“Sister?”

“Hey, David, what’s up?” I smiled, given that it’s been a few weeks since I’ve seen or heard from my brother.

“Ava’s water broke this morning and, well … the baby’s on its way right now.” He said, sounding slightly shocked. “I … I’m just leaving for the hospital right now.”

“But … I wanna go!”I insisted.

“I’ll pick you up,” David said in a rushed manner.

“Okay, see you in a few.”

Before I had a chance to reply, my brother hung up, leaving me in a somewhat awkward silence.

“Where are you going?” John asked after a couple of seconds.

“Ava’s in labor,” I said, replacing the phone back on its base, “David’s on his way to the hospital, he’s going to pick me up. Are you going to be fine with the kids for a couple of hours?”

He nodded his head and then pointed to the couch. I followed his direction and saw that the two of them were already asleep.

“Good job,” I complimented, “that’s got to be a record for them.”

John smirked softly at my comment and then pointed to the stairs. “Go get changed,” he insisted, “you look like a scrub.”

“I have one more month of maternity leave,” I said, “I can look like a scrub if I want.”

John raised an eyebrow as he suppressed a small smile. “You’re going to a public place, love,” he said, “you might want to rethink that statement.”

“Shush,” I grinned.

A few minutes later, after I had changed into a comfortable, yet presentable outfit, I threw on some basic foundation to even out my tired complexion and then pulled my hair into a neat bun. Spotting my brother’s truck in front of the house, I grabbed my purse and hurried to the door.

“Call me if you need anything, John.” I said.

“Alright, babe,” he replied, “love you.”

“Love you too,” I called over my shoulder before I shut the door and trotted to the street where David was waiting.

“Hey,” I said, “how you feeling?”

“It’s kind of surreal,” he said as we pulled back onto the street, “but … I’m … excited. It’s so crazy.”

I smiled at him and then placed my hand on his shoulder. After a couple of seconds, I felt the tension leave his body, and we rode like this the rest of the way to the hospital. Once there, we quickly made our way to the maternity ward. I smiled and greeted the familiar staff, seeing as how this was where I had given birth to the twins as well.

We located Ava’s family in the waiting room, and saw that our parents were already there as well. They were all gathered around Dr. Stokes, whom Ava had agreed to be seen by after David persistently requested her to. Everyone looked up at us as we approached, and we stopped short when we saw the looks on their faces.

Not liking their expression, I sank down onto one of the seats while David continued out in a hesitant manner.

“What is it?” He whispered.

“David,” Dr. Stokes said softly, placing a hand on my brother’s shoulder, “I’ve got some good news and … some bad news.”

“What happened, doc?” David asked.

“You have a beautiful baby boy, David,” Dr. Stokes said, giving him a soft smile, “fit as a fiddle, and getting cleaned up and swooned over by the nurses.”

“A boy?” David whispered breathlessly. “Oh, shit. A boy … how’s Ava doing? Has she been asking for me?”

“Sweetheart,” my mom said, wrapping an arm around his middle, “Ava didn’t make it. There were … complications.”

“But … no.” David said, shaking his head. “This can’t be happening. Doc,” he said, looking back to Dr. Stokes, “tell me this isn’t happening.”

“I’m sorry, David,” Dr. Stokes said sadly, “I,” he paused momentarily, looking at Mr. And Mrs. Peterson. “I understand that a few months ago, Ava made the arrangement that if anything ever happened to her, you would have custody of your child.”

From the looks on their faces, it didn’t seem as if Ava’s parents had agreed with her decision. David, however, nodded his head, already knowing about her choice.

“Whenever you’re ready, someone will come over with some paperwork you need to fill out, David.” Dr. Stokes said. “Mr. and Mrs. Peterson, if you’ll come with me, please.”

Giving my brother one last look, Ava’s parents followed Dr. Stokes from the waiting room. David slowly sat down on one of the chairs, a look of disbelief inscribed deeply into his handsome face. Although I hadn’t necessarily gotten along with Ava, or her family, I still felt as though my heart had fallen to the ground and lay there, beating pathetically on the dirty hospital floor.

Staring at the distraught look on David’s face, I couldn’t help but wonder if he had harbored some sort of deep affection for Ava, not just because she was the late mother of his son, but because he had some sort of genuine feelings for her. He said he didn’t, he said they didn’t have chemistry, but who knows. It’s possible that one day they could have made something work. But now, we’ll never know.

Although I knew my brother needed his family right then, I couldn’t help but long for my own husband and my children. I wanted to hold them close and shower them with kisses, and tell them that I would always love them. Life is never guaranteed, and you can never take anything for granted. Life could be over in a split second.