No! I Won't Fall for Him! (I Hope Not...)

It's been two days since Jordan's accident, and I haven't left his bedside. I’ve been crying these past two days, no, more like sobbing. I miss Jordan so much. No matter what happened those two months I was with him, they were the best two months of my life. Jordan was the most amazing guy any girl could ask for. I just wish I had more time to spend with him. I was in love with him and I couldn’t deny that. I could’ve walked in on him with another girl in his bed and I don’t think I could’ve stopped loving him. I’ve never felt this way about a guy before. I really hoped he would wake up. Truth is I don’t know if I could live without Jordan in my life. He’s just been so great to me. He treated me like I was some amazing princess. He always told me I was beautiful and I never really believed him. I always thought I was just that ugly chubby girl. Yet Jordan always said I was real. I never understood what he meant and I still don’t to this day.
　
Jordan has to wake up. He just has to. If he’s not awake by tonight he’s dead. The doctors are going to declare him dead. I just can’t lose him, I can’t lose the one thing I truly love. The person I’m madly in love with is going to die. I have to tell him I love him I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I know it’s sudden it’s just such a strong feeling I have with Jordan. But like they say ‘all good things must come to an end.’
　

*Jordan*
　
I felt a strong pressure on my hand as my eyes flickered open. I was in a very unfamiliar place and I hurt in places I didn't know could hurt. I turned my head and saw that Lana was holding my hand and she was sobbing.
　
“Lana?” I rasped.

She didn’t move or make a sound. I don’t think she heard me.

“Lana? Why are you crying?” I asked.
　
“Jordan? Oh my god, you’re awake!” She said and kissed me.
　
Wait? She kissed me. Why would she kiss me after what happened? I didn’t even try to explain myself. I just let her walk away. So, why would she still kiss me?[i/]
　
“Lana. What’s going on?” I asked.
　
She just looked in my eyes and kissed me again.
　
“Lana! What’s going on?” I asked again.
　
“Jordan, look I don’t know to explain it.” She said.
　
“Lana calm down. Just go slowly.” I said.
　
* Lana*

When he woke up I was the happiest person alive. I was so happy that I kissed him. Then he asked me what was wrong and I didn’t want him to talk. I wanted to just make out with him and tell him that I love him. I know it’s not really like me, but I just couldn’t help myself!
　
“Lana, calm down. Just go slowly.” He tells me.
　
He actually expects me to calm down. Is he insane!? He wasn’t the one who spent two days sobbing worried that they would never see the love of their life again. But he didn’t exactly know that either.

“Well I don’t know to explain this to you. How much you remember?” I asked.
　
He thought for a minute, “I remember Oksana kissing me and you seeing it and walking away. And me being an idiot because I didn’t follow you. I remember the smile you gave me before the third period started and I remember scoring the goal for you. Then I remember laying on a stretcher and talking to Sid. That’s all.” He said.
　
“Oh.” I said trying to hold back the tears.
　
So he did remember it and he said he felt like an idiot for letting me walk away. So, was he really not in the wrong? If I heard correctly he said he scored that goal for me. Why would he want to score a goal for me? Well, this called for a little explanation then. He didn’t remember anything about what actually happened.
　
“Lana before you explain. Can you please tell me where the fuck am I.” He said.
　
I laughed. "You're in the hospital."
　
“What the fuck? Why I am even here for!” He yelled.
　
“Jordan, would you calm down? Let me explain.” I said.
　
“Alright.” He said.
　
“Well, I can skip you scoring the goal because you remember that. So I'll start here. You were on your way to celebrate the goal with your teammates.."
　
“No. I was coming to see you.” He corrected.
　
“Oh alright. Then Avery got mad.”
　
“Typical. Poor baby hates losing.” He said.
　
“Yeah. He slammed you onto the boards. Your head hit the glass and you helmet came flying off. He 'accidentally' cut your neck with his skate, which would explain the stitches and the sore throat you have. You laid there on the ice unconscious for what seemed like forever. You were losing so much blood and apparently you refused going to the hospital until I was by your side.” I said, getting a little chocked up at the last part.
　
He sat and took it in. “Oh. But why did you kiss me when I woke up? I was a total jerk to you. I let you walk away from me. Lana, I didn’t deserve to be kissed just then. Is there any reason why you kissed me?” He said.

That broke my heart to hear that. He really did care. Didn’t he? So maybe he did love me. So maybe Jordan wasn’t such a bad guy after all. Maybe Harper was right about, maybe she was.

“Well I wouldn’t say total jerk. I was stupid” I said.

“Lana no you weren’t.” He said.

“Jordan, I should’ve believed Harper when she said that Oksana kissed you. I knew you better then that. I also know how much of a slut she is. But Jordan I just got caught up in the moment I guess. I jumped to conclusions. Ok, you didn’t follow me. But I just left. I could’ve asked you what happened. But I didn’t. we’re both at fault here.” I said.

“When you put it that way, I’m still the idiot. Look, how were you suppose to know she kissed me? If that was me seeing you kiss another guy. I would’ve been furious with it and maybe killed him a little later. But, don’t blame yourself. I should’ve followed you.” He said.

“We can go on and on about this. I’m just happy you’re awake.” I said

“Oh…you still didn’t answer my question” He said.

“About why I kissed you? I was really happy that you woke up and it’s not like we haven’t kissed before.” I said.

“God! Lana! Why are you so happy I woke up? I was such a jerk! Yet you seem thrilled I’m awake! Why?” He asked semi-yelling.

The way he was talking to me seemed like he didn’t want me to be happy.

“Oh and yeah we’ve kissed but never like that before.” He added.

“Fuck Jordan! They were going to declare you dead if you didn’t wake up. Ok! So now you get why I’m happy! You don’t get it I kissed you like that because I love you. Alright! I fucking love you!” I said.

I couldn’t believe what I had just said. I just told him I loved him. This wouldn’t go well.

“You love me?” He questioned.

“Yes, I love you. I always have from the moment I saw you and you said I looked beautiful.
No matter how much I didn’t want to fall for you or how much I tried to deny it. I realized I couldn’t anymore. When we kissed, I knew it. We were meant to be. I just wasn’t ready. When you saw me I was going to tell you then. But then I saw that and I left. But Jordan I love you. I understand if you don’t feel the same way. You could never love me. A disgusting, chubby little brunette girl. I’d just ruin your image. I just had to tell you.” I said.

I started crying.

I had a feeling he was not going to feel the same way as me.

“Lana, I never knew you felt that strongly about me. You wanted to deny it?” I heard the defeat in his voice.

“Yes. I was scared you’d be hurt. But I got hurt more by not saying anything.” I said.

“I’m glad you told me.” He said.

“So you can laugh about it with Oksana?” I said.

“No. Don’t say that Lana. I’m happy you told me so I can say that I love you too.”

“Wait? Jordan you love me?” I asked.

“Yes. I thought it was clear.” He laughed.

“Jordan, you don’t love me. I mean how could you? I’m that annoying chubby 19 year old girl. With short brown hair and brown eyes and b-cup boobs.” I said.

“Lana, better question how could I not? First off you’re not an annoying nineteen year old - if anyone's annoying it's me. Lana, you may see those as flaws but that’s what’s beautiful about you. You’re real. You’re not all artificial and fake. I rather be with you then any big bobbed blonde chick. I love you and that won’t change. What do you say when I get out of this hell hole we go on our official first date? Oh, and um would you do me the honors of being my girlfriend?” He said.

“ Jordan you’re such an amazing guy. Sure, of course we’ll go out! Honestly did you really have to ask if I’d be your girlfriend? OF COURSE I DO!” I said.

He sat up on the bed and motioned for me to sit next to him. I did and he kissed me. It slowly but surely turned into a make out session, which was then interrupted but the doctor.

I heard the doctor clear his throat as he entered the room.

“Oh sorry” I blushed.
　
“No, no it was bad timing on my part. I just came to check on Jordan.” The doctor said.
　
I saw Jordan’s face drop. I guess now he figured I left something out.
　
“Ok” He said.
　
“Well, I'll introduce myself to you first. I'm Dr. Derek Sheppard and I'm a neurosurgeon. Where you were unconscious for so long, I'm in charge of your case just to make sure that everything is okay upstairs."

There's something about this doctor that I like. I'm not sure what it is, but I like it.

"So, what's wrong with me?"

"Nothing's wrong. You're doing fine. I want to send you up to have an MRI done just to make sure that there's no bleeding or damage done. After that, we'll draw some blood to make sure that there's no infections from where you got cut on your neck. Sound ok?"

“Ok. But when can I get out of here?” Jordan asked.
　
“Well, that depends on the results. If the results are good, I have no problem sending you home in a week. But if there's something wrong, you'll be here for up to three weeks.” The doctor said.
　
"Three weeks!” I yelled a little to loud. Ok, I don't like Dr. Sheppard anymore.
　
“Well, Lana . It’s not like you have to leave. You can stay. We can get an extra bed. Anything to accommodate you.” He said.
　
“I know, it’s just 3 weeks is a lot.” I said, warming up to him again.
　
“No. I can’t stay here three weeks is a lot. I have a road trip to go on.” Jordan said.

I exchanged a look with the doctor. I knew it was going to come to this, and I didn't want to be the one to tell Jordan that he couldn't go. So, I just sat and rubbed my thumb along the back of his hand.

"I'm sorry, Jordan. But that's not possible. You're in no condition to fly, let alone play hockey. Now then, I want to get that scan done as soon as possible, so I'll leave you guys to talk for a bit, and then one of my interns will be down to get you." Sheppard smiled and left.

Uh-oh. This is bad. I thought.

"Jordie, are you ok?" I asked.

He looked at me with so much pain in his eyes. I knew that Jordan hadn't missed a hockey game in his NHL career - which equaled 245 games.

"This sucks, Lana. This fucking sucks! My streak is over because Sean Avery got jealous."
Jordan said, tears falling down his pale cheeks.
I got up and sat in bed with him, resting his head on my shoulder and wrapping my arms around him.

"So what? You're fine now - that's what matters. I can tell you that they did a scan last night and your brain looked fine. There's some bruising and swelling, but no damage. They're just doing it now for some precautions. And they probably want to keep you longer because you lost so much blood. Just relax."

"Relax?"

"Yes, relax. You're gonna be fine. And, besides, you finally get to catch up on your sleep." I smiled.

"And kissing you." He said, leaning up to kiss me. It got a little heated until I heard Jordan wince and put his hand to his throat.

"Now, see. I'm just too hot for you. You're gonna pull your stitches." I said as the interns came in to take Jordan to the radiology department.

"Damn girl. You are too hot for me." He said as he got in the wheelchair. "I love you, Lana."

"I love you too, Jordan."
　
The interns wheeled him away and I sat down to read my Cosmo.

********
I was reading Cosmo for about ten minutes and I was started to get a little bored. But I kept reading it was taking my mind off of Jordan.
　
I heard footsteps coming toward me but I saw nothing. So I didn’t make much of it I just kept on reading.

“Oh We’re sorry” I heard a man say.

I turned to see Marc and Natalie - or at least I think that's her name - standing there.

“Sorry?” I questioned.

“We were told that this was Jordan’s room. I guess the woman made a mistake.” Marc said.

“Oh no, no. it’s his room. I’m just waiting here for him. He went to get an MRI and I’m not sure when he’ll be back.” I said.
　
Marc just nodded his head and shot Natalie an odd look.
　
“Oh, I’m Lana. Jordan’s girlfriend.” I said, shaking his hand.
　
　
“Oh so you’re the famous Lana?” Marc said.
Famous Lana?

“Oh I’m Marc and this is my girlfriend Natalie.” He said.
　
“It’s a pleasure to meet you.” Natalie said.
　
“So we finally get to meet the girl that Jordan never shut up about.” Marc said.

I just giggled and felt myself blush.

"He really talks about me?" I asked.

"Yep. You're the only girl he doesn't stop talking about for that matter. He's only been raving about you and wants to be your boyfriend," Natalie said.

"Well, that's great - considering he is my boyfriend."

We sat and chatted until Jordan was wheeled back into the room.

"Hey Guys. I didn't know you were coming." Jordan said as he got back into bed.

"Well, we were gonna wait ‘til later, but we figured we'd come now." Marc said.

"How are you feeling?" Natalie asked, giving Jordan a hug.

"Not bad. My throat is sore and I have a headache, but not bad."

"So, what did the doctor say?" I asked, sitting closer to Jordan's bed and holding his hand.

"Well, he said that the scan looked normal. The bruising and swelling has gone down but my concussion is still pretty bad. My blood work isn't back yet, but he said by the scan alone that I'll be here for another few days or so."

"Dude, that sucks." Marc said.

"I know. I was really looking forward to that road trip."

"Well, think of it this way. Now you can focus on your sleep and getting well." I said.

He agreed and we all sat and chatted. I felt myself yawn and my eyes start to droop. but I was hoping that it went unnoticed.

"Lana, are you tired?" Jordan asked, squeezing my hand.

"A little. Nothing that a little coffee wouldn't fix." I smiled.

"Hey, Lana. Let's go for a walk. Get some coffee." Natalie suggested, getting up to grab her coat.

"Ok. Do you want anything?"

"Something cold." Jordan said.

"Throat hurts?" He nodded.

"Alright, we'll be back in a few."

After coming back from the coffee shop, we sat and enjoyed our drinks until Marc's phone rang. He excused himself to take the call and returned five minutes later.

"Have you heard anything about what happened?"

"Only what Lana's told me."

"And I know nothing."

"Ok. That was Glen Sather on the phone. He was calling me to let me know about Sean Avery's punishment."

"Well, what is it?" Natalie asked.

"Because he intended to injure you, he was ejected and got a game misconduct. But, they reviewed it and included the fact that he stepped on your neck. He's out for 50 games. And, Glen told me that the Rangers are going to suspend him further and make him go to anger management classes. So, he won't be playing until the beginning of the playoffs at least. But, there's a few deals with the league that would keep the suspension if he doesn't go through rehab and stuff."

"Serious?" Jordan asked.

"Serious. We want nothing to do with him. And I think I made that personally clear two days ago."

"What did you do two days ago?'

"You haven't watched TV?" Marc asked.

"Dude, I've only be conscious for like four hours."

"Oh. Well, I kicked the shit out of him. I know that we all agreed that when we're on the ice that we're just normal players, but no one hurts my little brother like that and gets away with it. Different teams or not, you're still my brother and I won't stand to see you hurt." Marc said.

"You did that for me?" Jordan asked, voice breaking and tears welling up in his eyes.

"Do you really have to ask me that question? Of course I did."
Jordan started to cry and Marc wrapped his arms around his brother in a hug, being careful not to touch his neck.

"I love you, Jordie. If I'm on that ice, no one's gonna hurt you. Unless it's me of course." Marc smiled.

I now realized how close the Staal brother actually are. They were there to support each other through everything - from broken hearts to broken bones. Jordan lay back onto the pillow and put his hand over his eyes. I saw him take a deep breath and he gritted his teeth.

"Jordan, are you alright?" I asked.

"It's just a headache."

"Just a headache? Jordan, you have a concussion."

"How bad is it?" Natalie asked.

"On a scale of one to ten? Fifty."

"Ok. That's our cue to leave. Call us later when you're feeling better." Marc said, squeezing Jordan's shoulder as he left.

"Has it gotten any better?" I asked once we were alone.

"Nope. It feels like it's gotten worse." Jordan said, a tear falling out of the corner of his eye.
I left the room and went to get a nurse. When we returned, she turned the lights off and placed a cool cloth across Jordan's eyes. I noticed he began to relax as soon as she did that, so I walked back over and held his hand.

"Alright. I'm going to give him some morphine. It will make him drowsy, but he'll be fine."
She took a syringe and placed it into the IV line, injecting a clear fluid into it.
I immediately saw Jordan's face begin to relax and a smile form on his lips.

"How are you feeling now, Jordan?" She asked.

"Much better." He said. She smiled and left.
I sat and ran my fingers through his hair, lightly dabbing the sweat off of his forehead with the cloth on the bedside table.

"Lana?"

"Yes Baby?"

"I'm gonna go to sleep." Jordan yawned.

"Alright. I'll be here when you wake up." I placed a gentle kiss on his lips and watched him sleep.
　
**6 days later**

Today was the day before Jordan was getting released, he came a long way. From practically being dead to now back to himself. Ok not fully. Jordan was still a little down because he couldn’t be on that road trip right now. The thing that sucked the most is they were coming back in two days. I have to say it was a little lonely without Sid and Harper. I still didn’t get to tell her that Jordan and I were together for six days. Ok so we weren’t official for long, but we loved each other for a while now.
　
“Baby. What’s wrong?” I asked.
　
“Oh nothing.” He said.
　
“Jordie don’t like to me. I think I know what’s bugging you” I said.
　
　
“Oh really? Then what would it be?” He asked.
　
“Bummed out. Couldn’t go on the road trip.” I said.
　
“Yeah! It’s not fair!” He said.
　
“It’s not your fault ok. It was that pussy of Avery.” I said.
　
“Yeah. But it still sucks.” He said.
　
“baby I’m so sorry. Is there anything I can do for you?” I asked.
　
“Well. There is one way I’d be a lot happier.” He said with a devilish grin.
I think I knew exactly what he meant. To be 100% honest I wasn’t about to say no. I think we’ve both wanted it for too long. It’s not like it would hurt. Right? I wasn’t a slut but I wasn’t a virgin either. I doubt Jordan was too. So it would be fine. But I thought it would be fun to play dumb.
　
“Really? What would that be?”
　
“Well. It involves me and you together with least amount of clothing. Or none at all.” He said.
　
“I’d like that. But how happy would that make you?” I asked sexily.
　
“just about as happy as when you told me that you loved me.” He said.
　
“I’ll do anything to make you happy and that’ll make me happy too.” I said as hopped into the bed.
　
He immediately attacked my lips. I knew Jordan could kiss but not this way. It was beyond amazing. His kisses were so hot, yet soft all at the same time. He started kissing down my jaw line until he got to my neck. He started kissing around my neck until he found my weak spot. Surprisingly he found it quite fast, a lot faster then I thought he would. He bit down awfully hard but I loved it. I moaned his name. I knew he loved it because every time I moaned, he bit harder. Jordan then grabbed me and pulled me down so he was on top. He began to lift my shirt, and I made his job all that much easier and just pulled off the rest. I then yanked off his shirt. This was turning me on and we hadn’t done anything yet. I was in for one hell of a ride tonight.
　
He unclasped by bra very slowly to tease me a little. I didn’t say anything because I was actually enjoying the teasing. He finally took off my right bra strap and was going on to the left one. Now it wasn’t turning me on as much as I would’ve wanted it to. But I didn’t say a word. He finally got that one off too. He didn’t waste time after that. He started rubbing my nipples in a circular motion. It felt so good. I kept trying to hold back moans and I was pretty successful. That is until he bit my breast viciously. I let out such a loud moan. Luckily the room was sound proof and there was no one else in the room or on this floor for that matter. He looked up at me smirked planted a soft kiss on my lips and went back down and starting sucking my left breast. I only moaned louder at this. Jordan was very skilled and he hasn’t done much to me yet. He started trailing kisses back up to my lips. After we broke apart I had this temptation I just couldn’t resist. That scar on his neck, it was somehow turning me on. I kissed his lips and slowly moved to his scar. I started placing soft, warm butterfly kisses up and down his scar twice. Then I thought it would be fun to pass my tongue across it. And so I did. He shivered and moaned loudly too. When he moaned and shivered I felt a sensation in my lower area I’ve never felt before. It was defiantly something I wanted to feel again. So I decided to give his scar another lick just to feel it all over again. This time he shrived longer and moaned louder. This made the sensation grow.
　
His hands felt all my bare skin and he moved down to my pants. I picked a good day to wear pants with just one simple button. He pulled them off in an instant. Now I was only in my underwear. I was still slightly uncomfortable. I didn’t really like my body too much. I was trying to get the bed sheet over me now. But Jordan pulled it away.
　
“Baby. I saw you already and you’re beautiful.” He said.
　
I giggled and blushed and just laid there. I guess if he thought I was beautiful and he was right he did see me before. It was ok I wouldn’t cover myself. He smiled and his tongue kept grazing my panty line. I didn’t know Jordan liked to tease so much.
Did he do this to all the girls he’s been with? Why am I even thinking of them? Jordan and I love each other.
He made his tongue pass about three-four times before he finally grabbed the top in his teeth. Then once again very slowly he pulled it off. He only went fast when it was practically off. Jordan immediately rammed his tongue into me. I gasped loudly at that. I wasn’t expecting him to do that right away. His thrusts get getting harder and harder by the second. This was definitely a very pleasurable experience. Within seconds he was eating me full on. He would bite gently and throw in a hard one at times. I was in pure ecstasy. Being here with Jordan was in reality all I had wanted.
　
After about five minutes of calm thrusting and ten of super sonic speed. I came. Never did I think that I could cum as much as I did.
　
“Very tasty.” He said.
I smiled and blushed and made my way down to his length. He was nice and hard already I was hoping to make him harder. I gently slipped him in my mouth. He was a lot larger then I expected him to be. He was eight inches maybe even a little bigger. To get that all in my mouth was defiantly and little bit of a challenge. It took me about three shots to finally get him fully inside. I kept sucking and moving my head in a vertical motion. I knew he was enjoying this as was I. I don’t know if I’d want to be anywhere else at this very moment in time. After twenty minutes Jordan was screaming in pure rapture. This just drove me to go faster and harder and a lot more forceful. Jordan came shortly after. Jordan tasted incredible.
　
“Jordan. Yum!” I said.
Jordan got off the bed and at first I thought that was it, that we weren’t actually going to have sex. But suddenly he grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the bed and wrapped me in a hug. He gave me a soft kiss.
　
“Babe. Why’d you get up?” I asked.
　
“I was thinking we could you know go get cleaned.” He said with a little smirk.
I knew what he meant. We went into the bathroom and he turned the water on in the shower. We entered the shower and we started making out. We then moved under the shower head. I lifted my left leg and put it around his waist. He put his hand around my waist to hold me up and he entered. I enjoyed the feeling. He entered he slowly but surely. We just stood there and kept making out non stop.
　
He then pulled out and kissed me again. I laid on my back and I think he knew exactly what I wanted right now. I then mounted my legs on his shoulders and he slid himself in me. It felt so good better then the first time he entered me. He kept thrusting in and out. After about thirty minutes of thrusting I wanted him to go faster.
　
“Baby. Are you scared to fuck me faster!” I yelled.
　
“No.” He said panting.
　
“Then GO FASTER!” I yelled.
　
He did as I asked. He went faster and I mean like 100 times fasted then before. I thought I was going to die for how amazing this felt and how fast he was going. After and hour of super sonic thrusting he released his seeds into me. He slowly pulled out and we got up and went back to making out and he put a finger inside me. He rubbed me quite hard and I loved it. He was able to continue this for about ten minutes because I came. I then grabbed onto the shower rod and stood with my back facing toward him he then put himself in me once again. I honestly think Jordan was trying to kill me by doing this. But I loved every second of it. He kept thrusting like there was no tomorrow. I can’t believe Jordan and I are doing this after only six days of being an official couple. But hey! I love it! He then pulled out and turned me toward him and started kissing me again. His hands started travailing all over my body. He was touching me in ways I didn’t think were possible. He started massaging my breasts and making them hard all over again. I dragged him to the edge of the tub/shower and I motioned for him to sit. He did as I said. I then put myself with my back to him and I slid down onto his member. It was hard as rock. I kept going up and down in a vertical motion. I know Jordan was enjoying this because he was moaning loudly. The moans were driving me to go faster and harder and stronger. I then got off and Jordan put me on the floor and he entered me once again. We kept going for two and half hours and we finally climaxed.

We then washed each other. And made out consistently. We were so hungry for each other it’s not even funny. Once we were done we got out of the shower and Jordan grabbed a towel and wrapped me in it. He pulled me closer to him and just held me there.
　
“WOW” I said.
　
“Un huh.” He said and kissed me.
　
We dried off and went to lay down in the bed.
　
“I love you.” I said.
　
“I love you too and we can finally go out now. Just the two of us.” He said.
　
“Can’t wait baby.” I said.
　
And I fell asleep in his arms.