Dancers Mended Heart
Falling
Matt kept telling me it wasn’t my fault that he got shot. But I kept telling him it was. Then he said I was in denial. Isn’t that just nice? Well visiting hours are flipping over. Matt can’t come home for another week. They want to make sure his wounds are healing correctly, and they aren’t infected. He ended up getting shot twice in his chest and one in his arm. The miracle is that none of the bullets damaged and internal organs. So that guy was seriously a bad shooter. But hey I’m fucking thankful that dude was a bad shooter. We were driving back from the hospital, my mom stayed at the hospital, their letting her stay the night. So I was pressed against Zacky who was deep in thought. His arms were wrapped around my waist and my head resting on his chest. I fell asleep in Zacky’s warmth. My breathing matched his as I closed my eyes.
I was running in pitch black, hearing nothing but white noise. I looked behind me and fell; losing my balance as I got back up, my face met the ground again. It felt as if a ton of bricks were dropped on my back, I screamed in pain, arching my back. I pushed up with all my strength and broke through the invisible force and started running again. Or I tried to run. I couldn’t push my feet to go farther. I felt as if I was running through peanut butter, my thighs and calves burned as I pushed through the force. I got through that and ran faster than I have ever gone before. My hair whipped my face and the wind carried a foul smell under my nose. I could hear ocean waves in the distance, and the floor became rocky. I listened to see if I wasn’t alone. All I heard was the soft crunch of gravel under my feet. I was alone. I sat down and buried my face in my folded arms. I cried silently to myself. I hated being alone. I heard a soft cry in the distance, almost a whimper. I looked up to see a small light in the distance. I got up and ran to it. I was so close but yet so far. It kept getting smaller and smaller. I yelled out, “stop! Wait for me!” the light stopped, and seemed to grow brighter and bigger. It swelled up and then made a ripping noise. Then it blew up. An explosion of sparkles and dust filled the air. The sparkles rained down on a small girl sleeping. I walked over to her. It was the girl from the hospital church. She looked so peaceful and innocent. She breathed in slowly and exhaled sweetly. I smiled knowing nothing bad can get to her. I bent down and placed my fingertips on her cheek. She was so warm. At the same time my fingers touched her skin a gun went off. I looked around frantically to see what happened when a ice cold hand grabbed my wrist. I looked down at the girl. Black shadow hands ran down her body, wrapping around her torso, thighs, legs, arms, and hips. The shadow hands pulled her away from me. They turned her over to reveal a bloody spot in the middle of her back. I stood up screaming, I turned and ran. I needed to get away from there. I ran anywhere, I didn’t know where I was going, and it was still pitch black. Started feeling things whack my body, they felt like pine tree branches. I face was scratched and bruised. I came into a clearing which smelled horrible. I stopped and sniffed, something was decaying. Then as if a giant light bulb switched on, the whole field was lit up. Dead bodies were lying everywhere. More was falling from the sky; I looked up seeing the little girl falling with a thud. I screamed and fell to my knees and covered my eyes. This was disturbing. I felt hands crawl all over me, shaking me. I looked around. Dead hands shook me violently. I shoved their hands away, only to find them returning to me. They started to crawl on my, burying me in their death pile.
“Aileen wake up!” a deep worried voice came from over me. I flashed open my eyes and stared into Zacky’s. He smiled and put a hand on my face.
“What is it?” I took hold of his hand and rested it above my head on my pillow.
“You had a nightmare, you were screaming, kicking your legs, and crying. Are you okay? Do you remember what it was about?” I sat up against my head board and looked down. I was still in my clothes. I glanced at the clock. Shit. 4:30 in the morning. Good thing we don’t have school this week, thank god to parent teacher conferences.
“No I don’t remember.” I lied; he would be so worried if I told him I was dreaming about dead people after what happened today.
“Oh okay, do you think you should go back to sleep?” I lifted an eyebrow, I honestly wasn’t tired anymore. So I shook my head.
“No…..let’s talk, k?”
“Uh, um…alright. What do you want to talk ab-?” I didn’t let him finish. I pulled him down to me and pressed my lips against his. He felt surprised at first, but calmed down due to my lips moving in a rhythmic pattern. He matched my kissing, careful not to be too aggressive. I smiled at his cautious use. He also smiled at my smiling. He gave me small pecks on my lips before moving down to my jaw line. He kissed me along there and slowly moved down my neck. I hope he forgot where my soft spot was. He kissed me softly and moved to my ear lobe. He sucked on that a little bit and then bit it softly before saying good bye to it. He brought his head down to my collar bone as he moved on top of me. He nosed the dip of where my neck swept down to my shoulder. Right in between there was my soft spot. He attacked that. I arched my back and gasped a little. It felt really good. He sucked a little probably giving me a tiny hicky. He moved his head farther down but I stopped him. He hung his head down knowing he shouldn’t go any farther then where he is at now. He looked up meeting my eyes and smiled a crooked smile. I laughed at his silliness. He moved back up to my lips and kissed me softly before getting off me. When he got off I took a deep breath and got up from the bed.
I walked to my desk and pulled out all the letters I’ve received from nearby dance studios. I kept refusing all the offers; I didn’t want to dance so soon, I wanted to settle down a little. I opened the one who I remembered had the best dance instructors. They said all professionals go into shows at the end of every 6 months. I wanted that so bad. I looked at what time their offices opened. 6:00 am. Well I have to wait another hour and 15 minutes. I sighed while I wrote down their number. When I was done I drew a fairy picking flowers. I was actually really good at fairies. I drew like crap when I tried anything else, but when I drew a person or something with same structure as a human, I rocked at it. I threw the pen down and pulled my hair up in a messy ponytail. I swept my bangs to the side with my fingers.
Warm hands pressed against my shoulders. I looked up to Zacky and kissed on his nose. He returned my kiss on my forehead.
“So you decided to dance again?” he picked up the envelope and studied the address.
“Yeah, I need to do something to get my mind off of things.” He moved his arm so it was lying on my chest. I held his arm there as he kissed the top of my head. He rested his chin on my crown and rocked me from side to side.
“Good choice.” He placed the envelope back in its place and walked over to the bed. I turned in my chair to watch him. He put his shirt over his undershirt and opened my door. He looked back at me and cocked his head towards the hallway. He wants me to follow him. I put my letters back in my drawer and turned of my desk light. I got up and walked to him. I placed my hand in his and smiled up at him.
We walked down the stairs talking about random things. Johnny and Jimmy were sprawled across the couches snoring. I laughed because Jimmy’s foot kept twitching. We sat on the floor leaning against the same couch Johnny was sleeping on.
“So are you happy you moved back here?” Zacky was playing with my belt loop.
“Yeah, well I had nothing in NYC without my dad, and I had no choice. But I’m happy now.”
“Ha. What about your career?”
“I had no money to keep going with that program, besides, I can move to Russia a spend less going into the ballet there.” I smiled and looked over at my ballet slippers leaning against my mothers work shoes by the front door.
“What about music? Brian said he heard you play, and you play it as if it were a guitar, you can get a record deal with that talent.”
“Yeah, but I don’t want that. Music is Matt’s dream. Dancing is mine. I can’t take that from him, that wouldn’t be fair.”
“Oh, hey what do you think of our sound?”
“I wouldn’t know, I’ve never heard you guys play. You haven’t been here in a while.”
“Oh, yeah. Well we have band practice on Saturday. So you can look forward to that.”
“Oh I see how it is……I have to wait 5 whole days just to hear you play?” I put on a fake puppy dog face begging for him to let me hear them before that. He lifted his chin to make him look serious and manly.
“Yup.” I rolled my eyes.
“Fine.” He put his arm around me and pulled me closer to him. I kissed his cheek satisfied. I do love him so much. I finally have him, and now he doesn’t have to be sad anymore, because I’m never going to reject him.
I was running in pitch black, hearing nothing but white noise. I looked behind me and fell; losing my balance as I got back up, my face met the ground again. It felt as if a ton of bricks were dropped on my back, I screamed in pain, arching my back. I pushed up with all my strength and broke through the invisible force and started running again. Or I tried to run. I couldn’t push my feet to go farther. I felt as if I was running through peanut butter, my thighs and calves burned as I pushed through the force. I got through that and ran faster than I have ever gone before. My hair whipped my face and the wind carried a foul smell under my nose. I could hear ocean waves in the distance, and the floor became rocky. I listened to see if I wasn’t alone. All I heard was the soft crunch of gravel under my feet. I was alone. I sat down and buried my face in my folded arms. I cried silently to myself. I hated being alone. I heard a soft cry in the distance, almost a whimper. I looked up to see a small light in the distance. I got up and ran to it. I was so close but yet so far. It kept getting smaller and smaller. I yelled out, “stop! Wait for me!” the light stopped, and seemed to grow brighter and bigger. It swelled up and then made a ripping noise. Then it blew up. An explosion of sparkles and dust filled the air. The sparkles rained down on a small girl sleeping. I walked over to her. It was the girl from the hospital church. She looked so peaceful and innocent. She breathed in slowly and exhaled sweetly. I smiled knowing nothing bad can get to her. I bent down and placed my fingertips on her cheek. She was so warm. At the same time my fingers touched her skin a gun went off. I looked around frantically to see what happened when a ice cold hand grabbed my wrist. I looked down at the girl. Black shadow hands ran down her body, wrapping around her torso, thighs, legs, arms, and hips. The shadow hands pulled her away from me. They turned her over to reveal a bloody spot in the middle of her back. I stood up screaming, I turned and ran. I needed to get away from there. I ran anywhere, I didn’t know where I was going, and it was still pitch black. Started feeling things whack my body, they felt like pine tree branches. I face was scratched and bruised. I came into a clearing which smelled horrible. I stopped and sniffed, something was decaying. Then as if a giant light bulb switched on, the whole field was lit up. Dead bodies were lying everywhere. More was falling from the sky; I looked up seeing the little girl falling with a thud. I screamed and fell to my knees and covered my eyes. This was disturbing. I felt hands crawl all over me, shaking me. I looked around. Dead hands shook me violently. I shoved their hands away, only to find them returning to me. They started to crawl on my, burying me in their death pile.
“Aileen wake up!” a deep worried voice came from over me. I flashed open my eyes and stared into Zacky’s. He smiled and put a hand on my face.
“What is it?” I took hold of his hand and rested it above my head on my pillow.
“You had a nightmare, you were screaming, kicking your legs, and crying. Are you okay? Do you remember what it was about?” I sat up against my head board and looked down. I was still in my clothes. I glanced at the clock. Shit. 4:30 in the morning. Good thing we don’t have school this week, thank god to parent teacher conferences.
“No I don’t remember.” I lied; he would be so worried if I told him I was dreaming about dead people after what happened today.
“Oh okay, do you think you should go back to sleep?” I lifted an eyebrow, I honestly wasn’t tired anymore. So I shook my head.
“No…..let’s talk, k?”
“Uh, um…alright. What do you want to talk ab-?” I didn’t let him finish. I pulled him down to me and pressed my lips against his. He felt surprised at first, but calmed down due to my lips moving in a rhythmic pattern. He matched my kissing, careful not to be too aggressive. I smiled at his cautious use. He also smiled at my smiling. He gave me small pecks on my lips before moving down to my jaw line. He kissed me along there and slowly moved down my neck. I hope he forgot where my soft spot was. He kissed me softly and moved to my ear lobe. He sucked on that a little bit and then bit it softly before saying good bye to it. He brought his head down to my collar bone as he moved on top of me. He nosed the dip of where my neck swept down to my shoulder. Right in between there was my soft spot. He attacked that. I arched my back and gasped a little. It felt really good. He sucked a little probably giving me a tiny hicky. He moved his head farther down but I stopped him. He hung his head down knowing he shouldn’t go any farther then where he is at now. He looked up meeting my eyes and smiled a crooked smile. I laughed at his silliness. He moved back up to my lips and kissed me softly before getting off me. When he got off I took a deep breath and got up from the bed.
I walked to my desk and pulled out all the letters I’ve received from nearby dance studios. I kept refusing all the offers; I didn’t want to dance so soon, I wanted to settle down a little. I opened the one who I remembered had the best dance instructors. They said all professionals go into shows at the end of every 6 months. I wanted that so bad. I looked at what time their offices opened. 6:00 am. Well I have to wait another hour and 15 minutes. I sighed while I wrote down their number. When I was done I drew a fairy picking flowers. I was actually really good at fairies. I drew like crap when I tried anything else, but when I drew a person or something with same structure as a human, I rocked at it. I threw the pen down and pulled my hair up in a messy ponytail. I swept my bangs to the side with my fingers.
Warm hands pressed against my shoulders. I looked up to Zacky and kissed on his nose. He returned my kiss on my forehead.
“So you decided to dance again?” he picked up the envelope and studied the address.
“Yeah, I need to do something to get my mind off of things.” He moved his arm so it was lying on my chest. I held his arm there as he kissed the top of my head. He rested his chin on my crown and rocked me from side to side.
“Good choice.” He placed the envelope back in its place and walked over to the bed. I turned in my chair to watch him. He put his shirt over his undershirt and opened my door. He looked back at me and cocked his head towards the hallway. He wants me to follow him. I put my letters back in my drawer and turned of my desk light. I got up and walked to him. I placed my hand in his and smiled up at him.
We walked down the stairs talking about random things. Johnny and Jimmy were sprawled across the couches snoring. I laughed because Jimmy’s foot kept twitching. We sat on the floor leaning against the same couch Johnny was sleeping on.
“So are you happy you moved back here?” Zacky was playing with my belt loop.
“Yeah, well I had nothing in NYC without my dad, and I had no choice. But I’m happy now.”
“Ha. What about your career?”
“I had no money to keep going with that program, besides, I can move to Russia a spend less going into the ballet there.” I smiled and looked over at my ballet slippers leaning against my mothers work shoes by the front door.
“What about music? Brian said he heard you play, and you play it as if it were a guitar, you can get a record deal with that talent.”
“Yeah, but I don’t want that. Music is Matt’s dream. Dancing is mine. I can’t take that from him, that wouldn’t be fair.”
“Oh, hey what do you think of our sound?”
“I wouldn’t know, I’ve never heard you guys play. You haven’t been here in a while.”
“Oh, yeah. Well we have band practice on Saturday. So you can look forward to that.”
“Oh I see how it is……I have to wait 5 whole days just to hear you play?” I put on a fake puppy dog face begging for him to let me hear them before that. He lifted his chin to make him look serious and manly.
“Yup.” I rolled my eyes.
“Fine.” He put his arm around me and pulled me closer to him. I kissed his cheek satisfied. I do love him so much. I finally have him, and now he doesn’t have to be sad anymore, because I’m never going to reject him.