Remembering To Forget

Five Years Later

The soft humming of mocking birds echoed through the kitchen, my hands hard at work scrubbing the granite tops. The sun barely peaked through the open windows, Sadiya hard at work making breakfast on the other end.

“Good Morning dear.” Emerson’s voice rang through my ears, my lips attaching to his soft ones. Smiling, I pecked his lips lightly, his suitcase sitting firmly in his hands.

“I woke up Ali, she should be down soon.” He informed me, as I nodded, my body leaning against the back of the counter tops.

“Have a good day at work.” I smiled, as he mimicked my facial expressions, kissing me one more time. He grabbed his mercedes’ keys, heading for the door.

“Oh, a package came in for you early this morning, It is upstairs in our bedroom.” He smiled, as I gave him a questioning look. He just shrugged slightly, before the house door was shut.

Who would send me a package?

Slowly walking up the staircase, Alison’s hair poked out of the large hallway, as she rubbed her tired eyes. I admired her blonde curls, practically identical to my own. Her eyes were a replica of her fathers; Hollywood’s power couple.

“Morning Mommy.” She sighed, as I smiled, planting a sweet kiss along her hair.

“Sadiya is cooking downstairs, I’ll be down in a bit.” I said softly, before heading off to my own bedroom.

A brown box sat on the bed, not matching the scenery around it. Slowly approaching it, I tore the tape off and opened the box carefully. A gasp escaped my lips as I carefully scanned over the items in the box. Picking up a particular frame, I smiled at the memory, which was well over 11 years old. His arm was wrapped around my own, both of us grinning brightly. Setting it down carefully, I laughed picking up a Rolling Stones tee shirt. I’d always fought him over it as teenagers, stealing it from his draw at every chance I could get. There were only two Items left in the box, A letter and a set of dog tags. Slowly picking it up, His name read across them, tears brimming in my eyes. I’d always admired him for wearing them, he was never ashamed of his diabetes. I placed them along with the others, carefully picking up the thick envelope. Scribbled in his neat handwriting was my name, Whitney.

Taking a deep breath, I carefully opened it, scanning the handwritting.

Dear My Whitney,

I know It’s been a while, and you don’t even know how many times I’ve tried to write this letter. it’s been almost 5 years since I’ve seen you in person; since I’d seen you in such pain. I was blinded by everything back then, And now I finally see.

We didn’t end on good terms, and I wanted to apologize for my horrid behavior. It was no way to treat such an amazing women like you, And I will regret it every day of my life. There is only one thing to say. i miss you. I know i’m nearly 6 years to late, But it took me that long to know what it was like to loose you.

It kills me to see you not in my arms, instead your in someone else’s. Just so you know, Demi did give me that invitation to your wedding. I’m glad my brother Joe walked you down the isle, and I should have been the one waiting at the end for you. Even though it didn’t end up that way, I guy can always dream. I wasn’t sure I could bare to see you be given away to someone besides myself. It should have been me, and sometimes I dream of what life would’ve been like if I hadn’t sinned like I did.

Cheating on had and will be the biggest regret of my life. I would’ve never been good enough for you, and I am glad you found Emerson, someone to hold when you cry. I wasn’t their for you when you needed me, and to this day, I wish I could go back in time and have a redo. I’m also glad god blessed you with little Alison you know she looks just like you. Joe showed me the pictures of her first moments of life, and She is truly beautiful; Just like you are.

Well, enough of that. I didn’t write this letter to tell you how much I miss you terribly and how beautiful you are, though both are very true. With everyone moving on in life, I truly feel lonely. You were right though, your words that night show changed me. Even though I’d wished i wasn’t such a douche to you all of those years, I can’t take it back.

No matter how long you try to hate and forget someone, you’ll always love them in the end. Your amazing Whit, don’t you ever forget that. I’d always dreamed we’d grow old together, the Paparazzi still trying to get pictures of how beautiful you real are. The best five years of my life were dating you, and I will always carry that on with me in life. Moving on hasn’t come as easy as I thought, but I’ve managed so far.

So I placed a box with this letter, to give you the things that meant most to me. The picture in the frame, the one I stole from your scrapbook when you’d moved into your new apartment. It was my favorite, and I always had It with me. The tee shirt, oh that Rolling Stones concert was to die for. It was the only one I’d kept after all of these years.You wore it so many times, it was practically yours anyway. And last but not least the dog tags. You know how much they meant to me,

So this was my way of showing how much you meant to me. I know that I will never forget you, and I am hoping these will bring back all of the good memories that we shared together. Our paths may cross roads again, and they may not.

I will never forget you Whitney, In my mind you will always be that Whitney Justice; pop teen sensation who was once was madly in love with a Jersey boy.

Farewell for now My love.

Nicholas Jerry Jonas