Once a Fragile Design

Suddenly, while I wasn’t paying too much attention to the table but to who ever was playing, groups of people came to the merch table. “Hey guys, what can I help you with?” I smiled looking at one girl wearing a very cute dress. She must have been freezing outside though, it’s cold today.

“I think I’m just going to wait for John. He said he’ll be my boyfriend,” I felt my mouth drop a little but quickly I turned it into a smile. The girl kept smiling.

“Did he now? He’s so weird. You can wait, I guess but you have to buy something,” I silently hoped John was kidding or I’ll have to kick his ass. And to keep my job on this tour I had to smile and keep these fans happy.

“I’ll buy that purple shirt, I’ll need the biggest size you have though,” one girl spoke and I noticed her cheeks flush a vibrant red when the other girls laugh.

“Sure sweetie! We actually have this shirt in a 2XL but I’m sure you don’t need it. And here, have a free poster just for being a sweetheart. Tell the guys that Roxie gave it to you and they’ll sign it for you no problem.” I shot a small glare towards the other girls but kept my smile on the girl who handed me the money for the shirt.

“T-thank you,” her voice was small and I could tell she was still nervous with the other tall girls near her.

“No problem, come back later if you want and I will make sure that each member of the Maine, Rocket and Versa will sign something or take pictures with you. I’m not friends with Boys like Girls yet, if I was I’d offer them up too.” I heard each of the other girls gasp as I told this. The girl just smiled brightly before saying thank you again and walking off.

“What the fuck was that?” One girl asked, I saw she had platinum blonde hair and a fake tan. I just shrugged.

“She was nice, for one thing, and another thing she isn’t trying to get with a taken man.” Okay, so sometimes I can’t keep my cool. Acey is my best friend and the other girl who wants to be John’s girlfriend pissed me off. Something else inside of me also made me clench my teeth. John’s girlfriend looked at me with a hard glare.

“John is not taken, he said he’ll figure something out about being my boyfriend.”

“Oh, did it ever run through that little head of yours that he just said that to make you happy?” I watched her jaw clench and from the booth next to the Maine’s Becca gasped.

“Roxie, calm down or Tim’s gonna bust a vein,” she tried to whisper to me and the two girls cackled.

“Oh, don’t want to get in trouble Roxie? What a stupid name. You really should think about going home, I’m sure the boys wouldn’t care.” I clenched my teeth, I was about to lunge at the girl but Becca pulled my arm.

“Girls, could you please leave and stop antagonizing Roxie. You can wait until after the show to meet the band, okay?” Both girls just rolled their eyes but, thankfully, left.

“Thanks Becca, I was ready to fucking hit that girl.” Becca nodded. I kept shaking. How dare that girl?

“Hey, I’ll man down your table while you go have a cigarette okay?” Becca offered and I nodded. I hugged her as a thank you and quickly ran outside telling a security guard I’ll be right back. I ran to the bus and punched in the number. I went up the stairs and bumped into someone.

“God damn it, I hate my life,” they spoke loudly and I saw Acey staring up at me from the ground. I could tell she was crying and her pack of cigarettes smashed in her hand.

“Okay, you’re telling me why you’re crying and I’ll let you bum one off of me,” I picked Acey up and I grabbed my cigarettes from the table in the front lounge. We walked off the bus, light up our cigarettes and walking back towards the venue.

“I think I fucked up with John.” I raised an eyebrow when I faced her and she sighed before telling me the whole story.

“You know, I almost punched that bitch in the face. That’s why I’m out here right now.”

“I don’t even know why I’m so mad or whatever this feeling is. But what I said to John and his face, God why did I do that?” I bit my lip before putting my arm around her shoulders.

“I don’t know.” I admitted, Acey drew in a shaky breath before bringing the cigarette to her lips. I was about to say something when Tim came outside. He looked around before spotting Acey and I.

“I need to have a word with the two of you.”

“Go ahead, like I need more shit on my plate. Fuck. I should just go home!” Acey yelled, obviously pissed off that Tim needed to talk to the both of us.

“No. Acey. I was going to ask what John did. And for you Roxie, how dare you insult a fan? You know they are here for the band, right? Without them you wouldn’t be here because they wouldn’t be here!”

“John told the bitch he’d be her boyfriend! Do you really think I’d take that? And then she told me my name was stupid.” Tim groaned, he slapped his palm to his face while shaking his head.

“I’m so glad we have off tomorrow. Roxie, you’re on grounding or whatever. You’re going to help me tomorrow with all the shit I have to do on the bus tomorrow. Your stunt was not appreciated and you’re getting punished for it. And Acey, talk to John or something, he’s in major bitch mode and you don’t seem too happy either. I want all of this fixed by the next show or…” Tim paused; I stared at him with my mouth opened and Acey just scowled beside me. “If this isn’t fixed you two are going home.” Tim threw his hands up and just walked back inside flashing his pass to the security guard.

“He is fucking ridiculous!” I yelled throwing my hands in the air and losing my cigarette in the process. Acey just sighed.

“Here, take this I’ll go merch for you and you can go back to the bus. Watch Harry Potter or something, I know that’s what I would do if I was in your situation. When this is over, I want to watch Azkaban.” Acey walked inside before I could even get a word in.

“What the fuck!?” Everything was just confusing and pissing me off.

“What’s up Rox?” I jumped a little when Nick walked up to me with a confused expression on his face.

“Tim put me on grounding tomorrow because I bitched this girl out.” Nick looked at me surprised.

“You bitched someone out? You? My little Roxanne who never spoke out to anyone ever before? No…” I rolled my eyes, pushing Nick away who laughed in response. “Alright I’m kidding. So what is the all mighty Tim Kirch going to make you do tomorrow?”

“Stuff that involves staying on the bus,” Nick laughed a little more and I just glared. He stopped immediately and put up his hands in defense.

“Chill! Come one, let’s go for a walk,” I just nodded walking with Nick around the parking lot. We ended up talking about a lot of things and I ended up telling him about the whole Acey/John/Kennedy/Me drama.

“So how do you feel about Kennedy now?”

“To be honest I don’t even know,” I started, lighting up another cigarette as I did so. “I’m starting to really like him but I don’t know how much I like him, you know?” Nick nodded, shrugging a little bit.

“So did you really defend Acey when you bitched out that girl or did you get jealous?” I opened my mouth a few times before I realized I couldn’t answer him.

I truthfully didn’t know.