Plenty of Fish

Mary knew little to nothing about men, except that they were comparable to fish. They were slimy, cold-blooded, and hard to hold onto. She learned that from her brother, Calvin, who was the biggest fish she knew. He cheated, lied, and tricked his way into women's hearts, and was a bit of a jerk when it came to Mary and her feelings. All Mary ever wanted was someone who would hold her hand and give her small gifts of love spontaneously - was that so much to ask for?