Break Apart My Heart

I woke up in Matt’s bed the next morning, with Matt nowhere in sight. I wondered into Amy’s room, but she wasn’t there either. That’s when it hit me; it’s Monday. I found Kim and asked why she hadn’t woke me up, and she explained my mother said I could have the day off. Kim said she’d be dropping me back home around 6, and that my mother needed to talk to me. She wouldn’t tell me why, only that it was important.

I spent the day playing with Matt’s guitar, helping Kim clean, and watching her soap operas with her. She made popcorn and tried explaining what was going on in the show, but the only thing I caught onto was that some guy was in a coma and two ladies were fighting over him. Zack’s mom dropped off everyone over here when school was over, and Matt pulled me into his room while Brian and Zack went to hang out in his basement.

“You okay, Colie?” Matt asked, pulling me onto his lap.
I nodded. “I’m okay. I hung out with your mom all day.” I smiled.
“Good. Now, the next time something happens, my windows always open.” He smirked.
“Okay.” I smiled. He poked the dimple in my chin and I giggled.
“We match.” He smiled. I mimicked his actions, and poked both his dimples.
“Yea, yours are nicer though.” I frowned.
“Why’s that?” He raised his eyebrow.
“People at school make fun of me.” I mumbled. “They call me butt-chin.”
He stifled a laugh and I glared at him.
“It’s not funny.” I crossed my arms over my chest.
He wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my head. “It is a little. Just laugh it off. If it doesn’t bother you, they’ll loose interest.”
I sighed. “If you say so.”
“I do.” He nodded. “So, lets get downstairs before you’re brother thinks you kidnapped me.” He teased.
“Okay.”

We walked downstairs, and he went into the basement while I sat in the kitchen with Amy.

“What did I miss at school today?” I asked.
“Brandon kissed Kasey at recess today.” She noted, taking a bite out of her cookie.
“Ew, seriously?” I chuckled.
“I know! I feel so bad for her, he’s gross.”
“Not as gross as Adam.” I stated.
“OH! Guess what else happened?” Amy dropped her cookie and stared at me with a wild smile.
“Someone set the place on fire and we don’t have to go anymore?” I smirked.
“Only you would think that.” She shook her head. “No! I was talking to Cindy, who talked to Amanda who’s neighbor is Ryan.” She smiled.
“What about him?” The name peeked my interest.

Ryan is in class with us, and he’s one of the only people aside from Amy whose civil to me. He’s actually pretty cute. He’s got blue eyes, black hair, dimples like Matt, and he wears cloths like me. We both wore a Metallica shirt one day, and that’s when we had our first conversation.

“Cindy said, that Amanda said, that Ryan said he thinks you’re cool.” She smirked.
“Really?” I couldn’t hide my excitement.
“Uh huh! Do you like him?” She asked.
I felt my cheeks heat up. “I don’t know…”
“You do!” She cheered. “Thank god! My brother’s so stupid anyway, I don’t know how you liked him.” She rolled her eyes.
“Yea, I guess.”

We finished the cookies and watched TV for another hour or so before Kim had to drive me home; Brian said he’d walk back later. It’s not a far drive, considering I live on the next block over, but Kim drove slow. I don’t know what’s going on, but I don’t like it. She’d glance over at me with sad eyes, and kept telling me that no matter what I was apart of her family. It was really starting to worry me. Finally, she pulled up to my driveway and gave me a big hug. I walked up the driveway and into my house; most of the lights were out, and my dad’s car wasn’t parked outside.

“Mom?” I called out as I walked through the doors.
“In the kitchen, sweetie.” She yelled back. Her voice sounded off…
I walked into the kitchen, where my mother was whipping her eyes; obviously trying erase the tear stains that adorned her cheeks.
“Mom, what’s wrong?” I asked.
“Sit down, honey.” She instructed.
I did as I was told, and she took a deep breath. She opened and closed her mouth multiple times, trying to find the right words to use.
“Baby, you’re father and I … we aren’t doing so well.” She explained.
My eyes widened. “Are you guy’s sick?”
She chuckled. “No, were not sick. But, our relationship isn’t doing so well.”
“Oh.” I was at a loss for words.
“Nikki, what I’m trying to say is …” She bit her lip. “We’re going to be staying with you’re grandma for a little while.”
I frowned. “But grandma lives in Sacramento. How are you gonna drive me to school everyday?”
“You’ll be going to school in Sacramento, until we figure everything out. It’s not permanent, honey. It’ll just be for a little while.”
I thought for a moment.
“Mom?” I asked.
“Yes?”
“Grandma only has two extra bedrooms. So if you and Daddy share a room, do me and Brian have to share a room? Or can he sleep on the couch?”
Her face immediately fell as her eyes glistened with tears. “Daddy isn’t coming with us, and neither,” She choked on a sob, but recovered quickly, probably for my sake. “Neither is Brian.”
“Why?!” I yelled, tears starting to prick at my eyes.
She pulled me into a hug. “Brian isn’t really my son, you know that. You met his real mother, remember her?”
I pulled away from her. “No! I wanna stay here with Bri and Daddy!” I screamed.
“Even if I said yes, you wouldn’t be able to. You’re fathers away to much to be able to take care of you.” She stroked her thumb across my cheek, but I slapped it away.
“I hate you!” I yelled. She stood in our kitchen, shocked, as I ran up to my room, slamming and locking the door.

I buried my face into my pillow and sobbed. She banged on the door for a long time, demanding I open it and talk to her. I barely listened, I couldn’t listen, but mostly, I didn’t want to listen. She’s breaking apart my family, and forcing me to leave everyone I’ve ever known and loved. Why should I listen to her? A while later I heard the front door open and close. I knew it was Brian when, maybe 10 minutes later, I heard stomping and another slamming door.

I waited a few minutes before I peeked out my door. I didn’t see any signs of my mother, so I snuck down the hallway to Brian’s room. I tried opening the door, but it was locked, so I knocked lightly at it.

“Go away.” I heard him yell.
“Bri, it’s me.” My voice was raspy from crying.

I heard footsteps and the door being unlocked. It opened half way when he pulled me in, locking it again behind him. His eyes were as red as mine probably were. He pulled me into a hug and I sobbed into his shirt. I don’t know how long we stood there for. Aside from our sobbing, everything was quiet; nothing needed to be said, we already knew.