Rebel Yell

I could have nearly cried at how much of a dork I felt being stood there whilst everyone laughed at me for something that happens nearly all the time. I had such an angry built up in me and I just hoped that nothing else would wind me up because I was truly pissed off now. I always look after every one of my crew members and I run circles for them so that a show runs smoothly but yet I receive nothing back, not even a ‘thanks Marci for buying that extra screwdriver at three AM’. As for Debbie and Louie, they seemed to be fuelling everything and they were supposed to be my friends but yet everything is at my expense. I was getting even more worked up now even thinking about the hard grafting I do for everyone of these people. I stood on top of a stepladder for my organisation of tonight’s tour bus arrangements and coughed loud enough so that everyone could hear.

“excuse me” I shouted over the noise and even though I was sure everyone had seen me get up on these cold ladders in the freezing weather, not one person looked in my direction. I breathed in deeply to regain some shout power as the rage was burning wildly inside me. “Hello, excuse me anyone?” I shouted and waved my stupid clipboard around that I had spent a good hour on to make sure that everyone was with someone they knew. Then it just seemed to click as those green eyes centred onto me before turning away back to Louie’s conversation. I shouted in his general direction as my rage hit its upmost level.

“RIGHT, IF YOU WANT TO STAY HERE ALL FUCKING NIGHT CARRY ON YOUR FUCKING WONDERFULL CONVERSATIONS BECAUSE I’M SURE AS HELL THEY ARE MORE FUCKING INTRESTING THAN THE PURE STRESS I’VE BEEN THROUGH-“ everyone’s eyes shot towards me and I smiled and lowered my voice “but if you care to listen to little old me because let’s face it I’m so great to look at then please do listen” the air became silent and I sighed out. “on tour bus one for tonight, there shall be; Luke, James, Bradley, Jade, Emily, Chris, Tom, Joshua and LeAnn” I marked off each name with my chewed biro and everyone stood still, still looking at me. “You can go if you want, your driver is waiting for you” and slowly people seemed to filter through and onto the bus behind me that had the number one spray painted onto it. I smiled as each got on, keeping silent and in response they all smiled as if they had just been told off by a batty old middle school teacher near retirement.

“You ok there Mar?” Debbie spoke softly to me like I was some neurotic suicidal maniac on top of a skyscraper. She offered me a hand and I smiled at it before looking back to my diary and the clipboard. I looked around and saw the people who I assumed were ether lost or were apart of bus number two.

“I’m fine, why shouldn’t I be?” I blinked at her and she took her hand away quickly, “people on bus number two are; Tre, Billie Joe-” I spat his name bitterly and I saw him shudder “Mike, Louie, Debs and Eric” I crossed each name off and I nodded to the bus.

“That’s all good Mar but who are you going with?” I looked at her blankly, who was I going with? Every bus was filled to their limits.

“I’ll find something- you getting going “I nodded and eyed the bus doors as Louie waited for her on the stair steps as everyone else had stepped on board.

“You sure you’ve got something?” she eyed me questionably and I smiled really unsure of myself but figured that if the worst happened I could always hitch a taxi.

“Sure” I smiled and pointed to the door, she looked me up and down before turning and heading to the bus door. I waved her away and I turned to mark down that bus two had left with everyone on board. I thought I had planned for myself to go on bus number two with Debbie and Louie and yet somewhere I had overbooked it. Then tour bus number one pulled away and I waved them away as I marked down that they had left. A spine shattering wind blew towards me and I rubbed my arms up and down. I so wish I hadn’t packed all my stuff onto bus number two. I was coatless, cold, and alone, with no transport and still quite upset from Billie’s little remark.

I was usually a tough person, to receive remarks similar as those from a boy. It was like second nature after growing up in such a small area with plenty of boys and yet those words hurt me more than I had ever anticipated. It was like someone had stuck a knife into my diaphragm and it had taken my breath away. This Billie Joe business was becoming more like a virus and I needed a way out, pronto. Wind blew into my eyes and a tear from the cold rolled down my cheek, I really did need to find a way to Arizona.

Suddenly a horn sounded and two headlights appeared up the street as it came zooming down the road before mounting the curb. It was the tour bus I had planted Debbie on and I looked at it curious to why it had returned, maybe they had forgotten something and I checked around me to see if anything had been forgotten.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Mike appeared at the buses door and I looked at him quizzically. He was acting as if I had been transported from out of space or I was that recurring dirt spot on a white shirt.

“Arizona is that way mate” I pointed downhill and he shook his head like I was stupid. He hadn’t changed Mike since the show and his wet black wife beater clung to him like Billie Joe’s did that Saturday night and I opened my mouth at Billie Joe’s image.

“I bloody know which way Arizona is Rhodes but we seem to missing you on here” he tapped his foot and I opened my diary to check if he was right.

“Rhodes? What is that some kind of nickname? And sorry to say but you are all full up, I’m not checked on this bus. As the inn keeper said to Mary and Joseph, ‘there is no room at the Inn” I
chuckled to myself and gave a huge sneeze from the wind that hit me again in my face.

“Good job we live in a barn then, Rhodes” he held out his hand and I stood up bringing my trusty, rusty stepladder with me. “You look freezing, come on get in you’ve pulled the short straw and you’ll be bunking with Tre and his crusty tour socks” I pulled my face as he pulled me on board and a loud cheer echoed from the toasty warm bus. I shivered as the bus doors closed behind me; it was so nice to be in the warmth again even if it meant having to endure some more
torments.

“But what about Eric, where is he going to sleep if I pulled the short straw for beds?” I asked as I walked along with Mike to the back of the bus,

“He got to choose but he figured you’d be more comfy sleeping with Tre in his bed rather than the floor” I looked at Eric and his strangely weird goatee and green Mohawk as he nodded to me before saluting. I knew Billie Joe was around but at my angle of sight I couldn’t see him but that didn’t matter because I could already feel the tension building. Debbie pulled me down into a hug and I yawned in her face.

“It’s not on the list” she imitated my voice and i smirked at her as I clutched my diary and clipboard close to my chest.