Shades of Love

It was sunny and shimmery at the beach, and as I took off my sandals, holding them in my hand, and dipped my feet in the water, I smiled out at the water. I wasn't going to go swimming today, but the water was warm and felt nice on my skin. I just stood there with my feet dipped in, moving them around a little to get the little schools of fish to move.

I guess that there wasn't really a point in arguing with Brett and Ashton about what I wanted to do, because it was always going to be 2 against one. Ashton was becoming less and less of a best friend to me, and I was trying to figure our whether that was my fault, or hers. She was the type of person that got way too caught up in her boyfriends to notice her friends that have been there for her, her entire life.

I looked down at myself, I didn't really like my hair at all, although people always complimented it. I didn't like the way my stomach looked and I didn't like the fact that I hardly had any boobs. I didn't like a lot about myself, really, but I tried to ignore my insecurities and go on with my life.

I pushed away all of my thoughts and tried not to think about anything as I continued to stare out across the water. I could feel my toes turning into prunes and so I slipped on my sandals, making sure not to step in the sand.

I hadn't made an effort to walk over to all of the groups of people along the beach. I was in my own area, behind the house, where nobody was aloud to go because the property belonged to the owners of the beach.

I walked along the edge of the water, moving closer and closer to the big mobs of people and this time I didn't hesitate. I was just going to keep walking, and if nobody wanted to talk to me, than so be it, but if they did, I would definitely talk back.

I looked around a little bit and noticed 3 familiar people, but I couldn't come up with who they may be. I knew that I had known them though, that part was for sure. My mind suddenly flashed backwards all the way to the time at Ashton's cottage. I suddenly remembered all of their names, and it should have occurred to me when Ashton had said we probably knew half of the people in London, that they were some of them.

They looked different, which is why I didn't recognize who they were at first. They were all extremely tall, but they were always tall. They were 2 years older than me, which meant that they were in collage now. One of the guys had dark brown hair that curled, one guy had blonde hair that was right at his ear lobe and the last guy had copper coloured hair and freckles on his cheeks. They were missing someone though, someone that I would want to see the most out of all of the guys standing there.

I noticed one of them staring at me and then turn to say something to the rest of them. I stood there and then I started to walk again. There was no sense in waiting, when they probably had no clue who I was and were just talking about how a creepy girl on the beach was staring at them.

I went to give them one more glance before I walked back towards the house again, but they weren't there anymore. I took it as a sign to just forget about them, they didn't remember me, and started walking back.

Maybe I'll meet some boys later at that party that was going on tonight. Apparently everyone knew about it, because Brett was famous here or something. I don't know, it all seemed out of my comfort zone, but I would do it for Ashton, so that I didn't seem like a party pooper. Why did it seem to always end up being whatever Ashton wanted. I guess in a way it was my fault ... I'm not fair to myself.