What Has Become Of Me?

Simple, pleasant darkness encases me as I drift to sleep. An escape from the world, a rest after a long day. Dreams, only what your mind can conjure so how could it possibly be too cruel. Images flash; a crying, kidnapping alpha. I thrash around trying to escape the horror but it just results in a massive claw apparently attached to me ripping open his chest. I feel as if my being is spilt between this carnivore I’m trapped watching through the eyes of, as well as a human girl laid trapped asleep in bed.

I feel warm tears slide down the human girl’s face as the man before me in my dream; nightmare, recollection or whatever else this horror show could be called, bursts forth from his soft, weak human form into a growling mess of fur and scars. The alpha leaps forward, set to kill. Immediately the bloodthirsty beast of a she-wolf leaps forward to meet him. It catches him off guard; what wolf pup would be reckless enough to leap to attack a charging alpha? Jaws clamp over his snout and tear away at flesh. An involuntary whimper slips out but turns to a growl as the alpha throws the she-wolf away. The she-wolf doesn’t even seem caught off guard. I watch through her eyes, think all her thoughts and feel the need to slaughter this unworthy alpha. Unlike normal, experienced fighters, the she-wolf has barely landed before she leaps again at the unsuspecting alpha. No one has recovered that quickly from his blows before. He turns and her teeth sink into his shoulder.

The realistic memory drags me from my bedroom and into the awful lair involving the fight. I don’t hear my human voice exclaim a short shriek or feel the burn of my wolf preparing to change but instead I feel the adrenalin from combat, taste the blood of success and smell the growing fear of the loser. Power surges through the she-wolf, through me. At home in my bedroom, painful snaps and my screams are waking the household.

Suddenly the alpha attached his jaws to the she-wolf’s throat. She throws herself forward sending herself on top of the toppled alpha. Her claws rip at his chest and blood flies. He accidentally releases as one of her claws scrape bone. She’s thrown over again but the alpha is too disadvantaged from his injuries and she easily gains the upper hand again. The she-wolf knows how easily she could end this fight, end his life but now sadistic ideas form. This man intended to do much worse to her and has probably done this to human girls; medicine time. He needs a taste of his own medicine. She clamps her teeth over his right ear and rips it clean off. Blood sprays and he howls out in pain. I feel my human reaction of horror but the wolf’s feeling of satisfaction overrides it. This isn’t too bad in the wolf world, but in nature this alpha would be left alive.

I feel the blood spray across the wolf’s fur as she flips over the alpha to bury her teeth into his stomach.

Before the nightmare can continue to reveal just how my wolf side managed to coat an entire bedroom with the chunks of another being, I’m torn out of it by the pain. Fire has spread through my veins. My wolf needs escape. I try to suppress it again.

“Thank God!” Dan yells from beside me with my parents, “Anika, hold on Nathan is on his way.”

Nathan is coming? He has to help me change and no one else can interfere. My mother reaches out towards me but my grimacing father holds her back. Everything suddenly becomes too loud as I feel my ears reconfigures to wolf ears. A growl tears through my throat as I hear the approach of something big.

“It’s just Nathan” Dan tries to soothe.

Suddenly I growl at my own brother. It’s animal instincts; I’m weak and in pain so I must fight anything that could pose a threat. My human mind scream they are family and want to help but my wolf sees them as outsiders from the pack and able-bodied enough to take me down if they decided.

A hand with extended wolf claws rip at my brother as I’m propelled off my bed with my own wolf strength.

Tears stream down my face. I can’t believe I did that to Dan. He grabs his face and small lines of blood begin to flow but he wills the already fast werewolf healing ability to quicken. An apology is forced from my human side from my brain to my mouth but mid way it turns to a snarl. Footsteps thud towards the room and my change quickens. My back arches as bones try to snap out. I suppress with all my might and it starts to still as Nathan bursts in. My parents are standing nearby, horrified that they can’t help.

“Anika” Nathan says using a clear and authoritative voice, an alpha’s voice.

I can’t do anything but beg to him through my eyes and scream as my wolf increases her power.

Nathan makes a quick decision, a dangerous one. He scoops me up in his arms then leaps out the window. Bush land that borders on our property is where he bolts to with me twisting and half morphing in his arms. My suddenly wolf paw rakes across his exposed chest. He winces but runs faster. My surroundings switch from being viewed by a human to suddenly a wolf. Water, running fresh water; I can smell it nearby.

“Anika” Nathan’s voice cuts through the confusion.

He lays me down on the rough ground. A tremor racks my body and I try to suppress the wolf, everything in me fights for control.

“Don’t fight it” Nathan’s calm voice instructs.

Is he insane? What am I suppose to do?

“Fighting it harms you long term, open your mind to your wolf” he instructs kneeling beside me, “let her share each other’s space.”

He’s suddenly lifting me up and turning me over to lie on my stomach. As I open my mind the fire in my veins lessens to just a warmth filling me. Involuntarily my back rises and I feel fur explode from my flesh. Bones hurt less as they morph and twist. My clothing rips to shreds as I rise up now as a wolf. It’s incredible. Everything seems to dead as a human but my wolf senses make me see the world anew. I blink a few times and stumble. Four legs is strange. Beside me Nathan has become a gorgeous massive wolf. His sleek coat shines and he gives me a wolf’s equivalent to a grin. Suddenly I feel an unnatural feeling of something, or someone, invading my mind. Immediately I stumble backwards shaking my head as if that can rid me of my new person, and third being, in my mind.

“Relax, linking minds is difficult while not of the same pack, but it’s just me.”

I blink astonished at Nathan. It sounded and felt like he was speaking but his mouth never moved. Nathan takes a step towards me and immediately my wolf backtracks two paces. Cold water hits my heels and I spring to the side hoping to avoid it. Slippery, slicked ground leaves nowhere for my claws to find purchase. Before I can utter a sound I slip into the freezing water. I thrash about in the cold water until I find its shallow enough for me to stand. Nathan standing on the safe, dry land is barking out something my wolf recognises to be a laugh.

Playfully I growl and leap forward. The strength in my limbs is more then I imagined. Instead of leaping right into Nathan, I leap right over the top of him. My landing is less then graceful; I end up rolling along the ground until coming to a stop as a mangled ball of limbs. Nathan’s laugh gets louder as he strides over to me.

“Don’t be pushing this too hard, I’m here to teach you, so let’s start”

Tonight will definitely be interesting.