Entirely Guilty by Design
Four
Of course I believed him. How could I not? I mean, the guy had me at hello. Well technically he had me as soon as physical contact was made. How much of a loser was I?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : And you're going to tell me how old YOU are?
matt: yes
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : K, well I'm almost 18
matt: I’m 26
I stared at the screen for a couple of seconds trying to keep myself from dying. 26? There is no way in hell that he was going to continue talking to me now.
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Are you serious?
matt says: does that freak you out?
‘He must be stupid. Why would it freak ME out? I’m not the one talking to jailbait here.’
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : No, you just don't look that old...
matt says: i’m sorry
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : For what?
matt: being old lol
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : You're not old Matt
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : So is that all you wanted to talk about?
matt: no
I cleared my throat and rubbed my eyes. If he had any idea how much he confused me...
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Ok, well what is it?
matt says: it’s something you asked me the other day, and today actually
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Spit it out
matt: about how i remembered you
I gasped in shock as I understood that he was finally going to tell me.
matt: don’t freak out ok?
I laughed nervously. It was a little late to tell me that.
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : I'll do my best...
matt: and please don’t tell anyone
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : No one at all?
matt: can i trust you?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Seriously. What. The. Fuck.
Then it hit me. What if this was just some sick joke? What if I wasn’t really talking to Matt Warner?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Wait, don't get mad but is this all a joke? Did Michelle give me a fake email?
matt: are you kidding? do i have to prove myself to you? this is why fans never get my email
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Try to see this from my point of view? This really makes no sense.
matt: look either you believe me or you don’t
I sighed and thought for a few seconds. I might as well just go with it and hope for the best, right? Sure, why the hell not?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Ok, I believe you
matt: do you trust me?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Somehow...
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Sorry. Yes I do.
matt: can i trust you?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Yes
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Matt...How am I supposed to not tell anyone?
matt: because i don’t know your friends. besides, i’m diffidently not going to tell anyone
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Not even Josh or Bert or Martin?
matt: martin already knows but i won’t tell anyone about what’s said tonight or in the future
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Before you tell me whatever it is you're going to tell me, can you just tell me why I can't tell anyone?
matt: because that person will then tell other people and so on
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : You don't know that
matt says: ok one person
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Ok
With that said, I clicked on my best friend’s MSN and started to tell her what was going on. I explained everything, from the moment I met him to now. She was more or less like WTF, but she somehow believed me.
matt: josh is going to be here soon so no more wasting time
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Ok
matt: it’s really weird
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : You said no more wasting time, and I doubt this can get any weirder
matt: do you remember july 4th?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Of course, it was the best day of my life.
matt: why?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Because I got to see my favorite band, I got to meet my hero..And I met you.
matt: what do you remember between the hours of 8 and 9?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Uhm, is that when I met you guys?
matt: yeah
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Ok well I saw you guys at the stand and I got my papers out and then I met Josh. I hugged him and I told him he was awesome and then he laughed and said "Thanks, you too" Then I turned to the left and you were there
Tears started leaking from my eyes, taking me by surprise. Re-living this moment again, and having to explain it to him, was tearing my heart up.
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Uhm I saw your blue sweater and I looked up at your face and you were smiling at me and then I smiled back and you opened your arms and I hugged you...
matt: what happened next sky?
‘I’ve been trying to figure that out since it happened.’
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : I don't know what happened.
matt: and this is why i needed to talk to you
I sobbed as I realized that that might mean he felt it too.
matt: do i need to finish or are you going to tell me what happened next?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : When I hugged you my cheek brushed yours and then my head rested on your shoulder and I remember how much you smelled good and how your hug was so soft and warm and I never wanted it to end and I don't know...Then I met the others and I went to the hotel and dreamt of you and I couldn't stop feeling everything... This is so retarded. Why are you making me say this?
matt says: do you remember how i asked if you where the one who had the joker shirt? i couldn’t stop seeing it everywhere i went
I sucked in a breath, remembering the past few days and how my life changed so much. If it wasn’t for Michelle, I would have never been talking to this boy about the most screwed up thing that has ever happened to me.
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Why did Michelle give me Josh's msn?
matt: because of martin
If I wasn’t lost before, I certainly was now.
matt: he was talking to her and they were joking around about how you kept talking about me or something and she told him that you told her that you couldn’t sleep or eat or stop yourself from going crazy
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : She did what?
matt: yeah and martin told me about it
matt: then a couple days later he asked me why i looked so fucked
matt: when martin asked me why i looked so fucked i told him it was because i wasn’t sleeping
matt: we all thought it was because of the screwed up hours we got and the plane rides, etc, then josh asked me why i wasn’t eating (of course he noticed)
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Of course
Background info on Josh: He used to have an eating disorder.
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Wait, isn't Josh back yet?
matt: yes
matt: he’s in his room and not bothering me
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Ohk? Sorry...You were saying?
matt: we were in a bar when josh asked me why i wasn’t eating and i told him that i just wasn’t hungry so martin asked me if there was a reason
‘Oh my God...Same reason as me perhaps?’
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Ok?
matt: i didn’t say anything. martin had had a few drinks and he started laughing and asked me if it was the girl with the joker shirt
matt: i guess by the look on my face he guessed but anyways he stopped laughing and asked me if he could talk to me outside
He stopped typing and I panicked. I was crying pretty hard at this point and was trying to explain to Raine, my best friend that was going to be the one person to know everything about this, what was going on, but she didn’t have more of a clue than I did.
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Matt? Are you ok?
matt: i don’t know are you?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Well, I could give you a better answer if I knew what it was you were trying to tell me
matt: you know what it is that i’m trying to tell you
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : That for some reason we both...
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || :
No
There was no way in hell that he was about to tell me that we both fell in love like it was meant to be. Or was he?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : And you're going to tell me how old YOU are?
matt: yes
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : K, well I'm almost 18
matt: I’m 26
I stared at the screen for a couple of seconds trying to keep myself from dying. 26? There is no way in hell that he was going to continue talking to me now.
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Are you serious?
matt says: does that freak you out?
‘He must be stupid. Why would it freak ME out? I’m not the one talking to jailbait here.’
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : No, you just don't look that old...
matt says: i’m sorry
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : For what?
matt: being old lol
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : You're not old Matt
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : So is that all you wanted to talk about?
matt: no
I cleared my throat and rubbed my eyes. If he had any idea how much he confused me...
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Ok, well what is it?
matt says: it’s something you asked me the other day, and today actually
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Spit it out
matt: about how i remembered you
I gasped in shock as I understood that he was finally going to tell me.
matt: don’t freak out ok?
I laughed nervously. It was a little late to tell me that.
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : I'll do my best...
matt: and please don’t tell anyone
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : No one at all?
matt: can i trust you?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Seriously. What. The. Fuck.
Then it hit me. What if this was just some sick joke? What if I wasn’t really talking to Matt Warner?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Wait, don't get mad but is this all a joke? Did Michelle give me a fake email?
matt: are you kidding? do i have to prove myself to you? this is why fans never get my email
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Try to see this from my point of view? This really makes no sense.
matt: look either you believe me or you don’t
I sighed and thought for a few seconds. I might as well just go with it and hope for the best, right? Sure, why the hell not?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Ok, I believe you
matt: do you trust me?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Somehow...
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Sorry. Yes I do.
matt: can i trust you?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Yes
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Matt...How am I supposed to not tell anyone?
matt: because i don’t know your friends. besides, i’m diffidently not going to tell anyone
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Not even Josh or Bert or Martin?
matt: martin already knows but i won’t tell anyone about what’s said tonight or in the future
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Before you tell me whatever it is you're going to tell me, can you just tell me why I can't tell anyone?
matt: because that person will then tell other people and so on
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : You don't know that
matt says: ok one person
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Ok
With that said, I clicked on my best friend’s MSN and started to tell her what was going on. I explained everything, from the moment I met him to now. She was more or less like WTF, but she somehow believed me.
matt: josh is going to be here soon so no more wasting time
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Ok
matt: it’s really weird
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : You said no more wasting time, and I doubt this can get any weirder
matt: do you remember july 4th?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Of course, it was the best day of my life.
matt: why?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Because I got to see my favorite band, I got to meet my hero..And I met you.
matt: what do you remember between the hours of 8 and 9?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Uhm, is that when I met you guys?
matt: yeah
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Ok well I saw you guys at the stand and I got my papers out and then I met Josh. I hugged him and I told him he was awesome and then he laughed and said "Thanks, you too" Then I turned to the left and you were there
Tears started leaking from my eyes, taking me by surprise. Re-living this moment again, and having to explain it to him, was tearing my heart up.
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Uhm I saw your blue sweater and I looked up at your face and you were smiling at me and then I smiled back and you opened your arms and I hugged you...
matt: what happened next sky?
‘I’ve been trying to figure that out since it happened.’
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : I don't know what happened.
matt: and this is why i needed to talk to you
I sobbed as I realized that that might mean he felt it too.
matt: do i need to finish or are you going to tell me what happened next?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : When I hugged you my cheek brushed yours and then my head rested on your shoulder and I remember how much you smelled good and how your hug was so soft and warm and I never wanted it to end and I don't know...Then I met the others and I went to the hotel and dreamt of you and I couldn't stop feeling everything... This is so retarded. Why are you making me say this?
matt says: do you remember how i asked if you where the one who had the joker shirt? i couldn’t stop seeing it everywhere i went
I sucked in a breath, remembering the past few days and how my life changed so much. If it wasn’t for Michelle, I would have never been talking to this boy about the most screwed up thing that has ever happened to me.
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Why did Michelle give me Josh's msn?
matt: because of martin
If I wasn’t lost before, I certainly was now.
matt: he was talking to her and they were joking around about how you kept talking about me or something and she told him that you told her that you couldn’t sleep or eat or stop yourself from going crazy
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : She did what?
matt: yeah and martin told me about it
matt: then a couple days later he asked me why i looked so fucked
matt: when martin asked me why i looked so fucked i told him it was because i wasn’t sleeping
matt: we all thought it was because of the screwed up hours we got and the plane rides, etc, then josh asked me why i wasn’t eating (of course he noticed)
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Of course
Background info on Josh: He used to have an eating disorder.
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Wait, isn't Josh back yet?
matt: yes
matt: he’s in his room and not bothering me
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Ohk? Sorry...You were saying?
matt: we were in a bar when josh asked me why i wasn’t eating and i told him that i just wasn’t hungry so martin asked me if there was a reason
‘Oh my God...Same reason as me perhaps?’
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Ok?
matt: i didn’t say anything. martin had had a few drinks and he started laughing and asked me if it was the girl with the joker shirt
matt: i guess by the look on my face he guessed but anyways he stopped laughing and asked me if he could talk to me outside
He stopped typing and I panicked. I was crying pretty hard at this point and was trying to explain to Raine, my best friend that was going to be the one person to know everything about this, what was going on, but she didn’t have more of a clue than I did.
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Matt? Are you ok?
matt: i don’t know are you?
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : Well, I could give you a better answer if I knew what it was you were trying to tell me
matt: you know what it is that i’m trying to tell you
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || : That for some reason we both...
|| Sky || Just give me a moment to restart my heart || :
No
There was no way in hell that he was about to tell me that we both fell in love like it was meant to be. Or was he?