Status: Ongoing
Closer to The Sky
Overlooked
Dearest Laura,
They say that writing is the best way to relieve stress. Now, I’m not sure about that. But then again, what can I do? You’ve slipped away from the space between my fingers. You’re so distant that sometimes I debate whether you’re even there. Sadly, Laura, you can’t stop me anymore. I don’t think any words or a specific code or equation can sum up to how strongly I feel about you.
I wish you weren’t so selfish, Laura. You know how much I loved you. That I would give-up my fucking Physics homework just to see a silhouette of your body, or drop my family in a heartbeat just to see a strand of your hair. Have you forgotten that I used to be that perfect straight-A student? Well, no more. That’s how much I loved you. Would you believe I skipped a whole quarter of school just to be with you? Who the hell am I kidding? I love you. And that’s no joke – unlike how you treated me.
Now that you’re dead, well, I have a lot of things to say. Believe me, when my parents’ (Yes, they were never angry at you, much as you thought.) brought me to the morgue to help identify your body, I cried. As my feet stumbled straight inside the room where they finished their ‘autopsy’, your body was lying in a steel table. (Remember when we were partners in Physics? Jesus Christ! Your body was placed on the exact same steel table wherein we made all those metal crafts! Have they got no soul?) Anyway, I didn’t see you right away because a long white cloth was placed on top of your body.
But there was one thing I couldn’t deny. Your quirky nose poked through the cloth. I guess that’s why I knew it was you right at that very moment. I mean, you, yourself, said that your nose was in such an odd shape. Like it was too pointy for its’ own good. Well, now, you said it had no benefits. That would be a lie. Because at that very moment, when the doctor was about to pull the cloth to reveal your face, I said: “No, stop! It IS her,” before running quickly back to the upper area with all those casket designs. Believe me, I sure felt like an outsider.
It’s already 6:55 AM. I have to go to school now. You see, I have some stuff to fix for college – something that you’re never going to go to because, well, you’re never coming back for it. Your burial is going to be in a couple of days. I heard that your parents decided to cremate you, put you inside this small jar so that they can bring you with them everywhere. That’s kind of creepy. But I think I’ve seen even worse things – like you, when you were breathing.
Okay, I ranted farther.
I’ll talk to you later, Laura the Carnelian.
Noah the Hawkins
P.S: I fucking love you.
The bell rang, marking the end of classes. Even though there’re only a couple more weeks before I graduate, I can’t help but feel a succumbing death towards meeting anyone. It’s just too much to bear. I can’t see the future as well as I did when she was here, my star and my everything – all gone because of a razorblade and sleeping pills.
As I walked along the halls, people stared at me with dark eyes. I felt like at any given moment, I can stop breathing – just like Laura.
And, no, I wasn’t about to give up.
They say that writing is the best way to relieve stress. Now, I’m not sure about that. But then again, what can I do? You’ve slipped away from the space between my fingers. You’re so distant that sometimes I debate whether you’re even there. Sadly, Laura, you can’t stop me anymore. I don’t think any words or a specific code or equation can sum up to how strongly I feel about you.
I wish you weren’t so selfish, Laura. You know how much I loved you. That I would give-up my fucking Physics homework just to see a silhouette of your body, or drop my family in a heartbeat just to see a strand of your hair. Have you forgotten that I used to be that perfect straight-A student? Well, no more. That’s how much I loved you. Would you believe I skipped a whole quarter of school just to be with you? Who the hell am I kidding? I love you. And that’s no joke – unlike how you treated me.
Now that you’re dead, well, I have a lot of things to say. Believe me, when my parents’ (Yes, they were never angry at you, much as you thought.) brought me to the morgue to help identify your body, I cried. As my feet stumbled straight inside the room where they finished their ‘autopsy’, your body was lying in a steel table. (Remember when we were partners in Physics? Jesus Christ! Your body was placed on the exact same steel table wherein we made all those metal crafts! Have they got no soul?) Anyway, I didn’t see you right away because a long white cloth was placed on top of your body.
But there was one thing I couldn’t deny. Your quirky nose poked through the cloth. I guess that’s why I knew it was you right at that very moment. I mean, you, yourself, said that your nose was in such an odd shape. Like it was too pointy for its’ own good. Well, now, you said it had no benefits. That would be a lie. Because at that very moment, when the doctor was about to pull the cloth to reveal your face, I said: “No, stop! It IS her,” before running quickly back to the upper area with all those casket designs. Believe me, I sure felt like an outsider.
It’s already 6:55 AM. I have to go to school now. You see, I have some stuff to fix for college – something that you’re never going to go to because, well, you’re never coming back for it. Your burial is going to be in a couple of days. I heard that your parents decided to cremate you, put you inside this small jar so that they can bring you with them everywhere. That’s kind of creepy. But I think I’ve seen even worse things – like you, when you were breathing.
Okay, I ranted farther.
I’ll talk to you later, Laura the Carnelian.
Noah the Hawkins
P.S: I fucking love you.
The bell rang, marking the end of classes. Even though there’re only a couple more weeks before I graduate, I can’t help but feel a succumbing death towards meeting anyone. It’s just too much to bear. I can’t see the future as well as I did when she was here, my star and my everything – all gone because of a razorblade and sleeping pills.
As I walked along the halls, people stared at me with dark eyes. I felt like at any given moment, I can stop breathing – just like Laura.
And, no, I wasn’t about to give up.
♠ ♠ ♠
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