Dead!

Ryan collapsed on the floor in the bathroom. He looked around the room, not even noticing my presence. He wasn't the hero I had imagined him to be. He was a drug addict. He sniffed and smoked and did whatever he could to end it all.

He took he belt off his pants and tied it tight around his upper arm. He grabbed a needle out of the bag next to him and jabbed it into himself. I hated seeing this. He took the needle out and put his belt back on. Anger built inside me as I watched him pull out a bottle of sleeping pills. He opened them and poured five into his hand.

I knealed down in back of him and whispered directly into his ear.

"Just take another pill, Ry. I bet you'll do it. Bet you'll fall asleep and wake up with a headache."

"Who said that!" He looked around the room frantically.

"C'mon Ry. Whatcha waiting for. You know you and Brendon will get into another fight. Maybe they'll kick you out of the band."

"Stop it!" He screamed.

"Ry, you okay?" Jon knocked on the locked door.

"C'mon Ry. Take another pill."

"Stop it! Get away from me!" He yelled.

"Ryan! What are you doing!?" Jon yelled, trying to get through the door. I turned the lock and all three members came running in.

"Ryan!" Spencer screamed at the sight of his best friend laying on the ground with a bottle in his hand and a needle on the floor. Jon lifted him up and Spencer threw away all of the drugs, little did he know, there was much more hidden in this bus.

I couldn't help but cry at the sight of Ryan. No wonder he was so thin. Brendon was dabbing his forehead with a wet cloth and Jon was on the phone with Pete.

"No I didn't know! Are you crazy!?" Jon yelled into the receiver. He hung up and Pete came running from the venue and into the bus. He knealed down next to Ryan and put an arm on his stomach.

"Ry, you okay?" He asked softly.

"Voices. Her voice. A girl was whispering to me." He said weakly.

"Who's voice?" Pete asked.

"I don't know. She was teasing me to do it, as if to make me stop."

"Ryan, what voice are you talking about. We didn't hear anything." Brendon said.

"A voice. She was helping me by telling me to do it. It was weird." He said, before falling asleep. Jon sighed and sat down on the couch across from him.

"Is he gonna be okay?" Spencer asked.

"I'm pretty sure. It doesn't look like he overdosed." Pete replied.

Brendon grabbed the remote and turned on the television low. Gerard walked in and set down a glass of water for Ryan and sat next to Jon.

The news came on and Brendon groaned. "No one cares!" He said to the screen and changed it.

"Wait put it back!" Gerard said. Brendon rolled his eye and changed it back.

As you see, paramedics are lifting Clarissa Senners onto the stretcher and covering her in a white sheet. The long search has ended. Hikers walking around in the woods early this morning came across her body. The young music prodigy from Orange County was found dead. Investigators claim she was tortured before being stabbed repeatedly. No clues have been found yet on the seen.

"So she died?" Brendon asked Gerard. He nodded and shook his head with pity.

"How can you just kill a girl like that? Just because she had a great talent." Gerard said softly.

"I can't believe after all she's done, she's dead." Jon said.

I wanted very much to show them I was listening. I really did. I wanted them to know I was watching over them now and that I was okay. I saw Gerard get up and walk upstairs to his bunk. I followed. This is my chance.

He sat down on his bed and started to draw. Not just anyone. Me. He was drawing me. I leaned over him and leaned into his ear.

"She's okay." I whispered.

"Who's there?" He asked.

"Clarissa." His eyes widened in fear.

"Guys, if this is some joke it's not funny." I sighed and let a shower of silver fall over me as I appeared before him. His eyes widened and he opened his mouth to scream, but nothing came out.

"Hello." I smiled. I could tell I was transparent. He could only see a ghostly figure of me.

"You. How are you here? Is this a dream?"

"Nope. I died, but wasn't meant to. So I was sent here to protect you guys. Remember at the hotel you guys didn't get on the elevator?" He slowly nodded, "That was me. I knew the elevator would have fallen, so I stopped it and made you take the stairs."

"And the voice Ryan heard?"

"I was teasing him. I knew if I did, he wouldn't take the pills."

"So you've been following us around everywhere?"

"Yup. If I weren't here, Spencer would have been electrocuted earlier today, and Mikey would haven't been around to eat that piece of toast." He let out a small laugh.

"You know who we are?"

"Yeah, you guys are all my heroes. Well, after seeing how Ryan really is, my respect level has decreased."

"Maybe you can help him."

"Yeah, maybe."

"So do you have any cool powers?"

"I have wings. I can move things with my mind, and can move really fast. I can talk to you without being seen and can disappear in a second."

"That's amazing." I nodded. "Do you want to meet everyone else?" He asked. I nodded. He grabbed my hand and we walked down the stairs. We walked into the living room and everyone's eyes widened. I had forgotten I was deathly pale and had red gashes in my arm and scars everywhere.

"You're that kid who died!" Brendon said, hiding behind a couch. I laughed.

"Gerard what did you do!? Fucking raise her from the dead!?" Jon said, following Brendon.

"I'm a guardian angel now. If I weren't here, Brendon would have already tripped down the stairs, Spencer would have been electrocuted, Mikey would have gotten in a fight with a toaster, and Ryan would have overdosed."

"So you were the voice that stopped him?" Brendon asked, more softly now.

"Yeah." I looked over at the sleeping Ryan Ross. He even looked beautiful when he slept. So peaceful. But that was interrupted with the headaches.

"Something wrong?" Pete asked.

"Hang on. Ryan's having a bad dream. I'll be right back."

"RYAN ROSS! ANSWER ME!" The man yelled.

"I HATE YOU!" Ryan replied and ran out of the room and into his. He locked the door and watched his dad drive out of the driveway in rage. Ryan snickered and pulled out a box. He grabbed a bag of pot and a razor. He rolled up his joint and lit it. He inhaled the smoke in and out.
He grabbed the razor and pressed it against his wrist, leaving droplets of blood to scatter across the wooden floor. There was nothing I could do. I was in a dream. I could only watch in my horror.
The blade cut in deep, but he smiled. He wrapped up the bandage and continued to smoke. Hit eyes were becoming blood-shot and watery. The room filled with a scent that was sweet, yet unbearable. He got up and opened his window to let all the smoke out. He leaned back on his bed and his phone rang.

"Hello?" He answered in a daze.

"Ryan!" His father sang in a drunken slur.

"What do you want dad. Dont' call me when your buzzed." Ryan hissed, still dazed.

"I love you son. I want to throw a party, and I want to sail the ocean and catch...fishies." He hiccuped into the phone.

"I hate you dad." Ryan said before hanging up the phone and slamming it down. He realized the last of his joint was gone. He grabbed a jacket and walked out the door, probably to go and buy more drugs.

I came back to the real world, shocked. I moved over to Ryan and lifted up the sleeve to his long sleeve shirt and saw the various cuts on his arms.

"He said it was when he fell out of a tree." Spencer tried to defend his friend. I looked up at him with tearful eyes.

"I'm sorry. I saw it. It wasn't a tree. It was a razor. He was high and cut himself." I said, sliding the sleeve back down at the sight of him waking up.

"Wha-What's going on?" He groaned, everyone just glared at him.

"I can't believe you Ryan. My best friend, has such a good life and tries to throw it away with drugs. You're lucky you have a guardian angel." Spencer said, pointing at me. I looked away when I felt his eyes on me.

"Aren't you dead?" He asked, his eyes wide in fear.

"She's our guardian angel. You could have overdosed in there if i weren't for her!" Jon raised his voice.

"It's my life so leave me alone! I control my life!" Ryan yelled, pointing at himself.

"You may control your life, but I control your contract!" Pete yelled. Ryan sighed with defeat and layed back into the couch.

"I'll try to stop." He mumbled into the pillow.

"You will stop. And I'll help."