Have Kids, Then We'll Talk

There were bright lights pervading a dark that was meant to be seductive. And there were screams of mirth coupling with moans of public pleasure to interrupt the music. Some people were dancing. There were people talking, giggling, teasing, flirting.

And then there was Daniel. I was staring obviously enough for Madie to notice and nudge me on the shoulder. Perhaps I was staring too obviously for that sweet boy to realize I was staring at him. Or at least, that was Mads’ take on it.

“Honestly Cassandra…you’re going to bore a hole in his skull…” I ignored the smartass remark that came from my right and chose to respond with a light smack to the back of her pretty ebony-haired head.

“You be quiet, skinny. I’m going to keep staring until he stares back and that is the end of it.” He would stare back. I could make him stare back.

But perhaps Madelyn knew him a bit better. “Sure. So how long are you planning to stand here staring at him like a stalker? You’re probably intimidating him. Poor guy. Seriously Cass, I could just talk to— “

“No. I don’t want some sort of junior-high interloping thing, okay? I’m just going to sit here and wait for him to detach himself from Aiden’s hip and ask me to dance.”

Madie snorted; that girl really gets to me sometimes. But she had a point: Aiden and Dan looked like Siamese lovers sometimes. Unfortunately for me, because I hate Aiden Way and I hate seeing his face and I hate that he has such a hold on my Daniel.

My Daniel? I must be so far gone over this guy. With a loud, defeated thump, I let my head fall onto the table in front of me. Madie made a sort of sympathetic noise as she took my shoulder and led me to the bar.

“If rum and coke can’t solve your problems, I don’t know what will,” were her exact words.

“Oh so, I can get drunk, make a fool of myself, ask Dan out and then puke all over him? Great plan, ma petite cherie.” Even the bartender smirked at the sarcasm. Madie, however, just rolled her eyes. She hated when I referred to her by that cute French nickname.

“For the last time, I am not that lame cartoon girl!” she almost hissed. “And yes, alchohol will solve your problems. You seriously need to loosen up. Hitch up your skirt a little.”

I looked at my skirt and then at her blue eyes. “Seriously? Are you drunk? I’m not really cool with the idea of flashing the entire dance floor.” I was already wearing my shortest piece, even though according to Chaz, it needed to be much shorter. It’s really kind of pointless getting fashion advice from someone so comfortable in her own skin.

Two drinks later, I had to fight my way back to the dance floor and do my best to ignore Madie’s protests and insistence that more alcohol was required. It wasn’t though. I hate losing control.

“Stop trying to get me drunk, Madie. It will solve nothing.”

“It will solve everything,” she argued, putting an absurd emphasis on ‘everything’, as though world peace would suddenly be achieved once I was inebriated. I didn’t argue back though; involuntarily rolling my eyes, I made my way forward towards Daniel again. I noticed a sudden silence behind my shoulder and realized that ma Cherie had disappeared.

I briefly wondered if she ran into Dick before letting down my mental barriers and getting lost in the repetitive rhythms of party remixes. It’s almost like flying. Eyes close, limbs swaying and moving of their own accord. It’s free verse ballet and interruptions are usually unwelcome. This does not apply, however, if the interruption takes the form of a blonde, puppy-dog-eyed, strong-armed and sweet boy named Daniel Iero. No, in such a case, the interruption is most welcome and even encouraged.

I stopped my tribal spasms to gaze at the mold of physical perfection.

“Hi,” he said. I must admit I was disappointed. I’d been hoping for something along the lines of ‘You’re beautiful’. But there was still time and I would take advantage of it.

“Hi,” was, unfortunately, all I could think of to say in return. Yet a feeble attempt at conversation forced itself out of my mouth anyway. “Are you looking for Madie? She was with me before, but now…” I trailed off and looked around me, hoping and not hoping that she’d be there.

“No, uh…I was actually looking for you.” The impact of his words didn’t really hit me for a few seconds. I was too busy looking at his fingers. They’re so…pretty.

“For me?” I was a bit surprised. But not too much. And despite my prayers that I would blush, I felt it moving up my neck and into my cheeks. “What for?”

He was silent. For a long time (or at least it seemed like it). “Y’know, just…we haven’t hung out much lately.” Perhaps it was good that he was taciturn, or I might have melted from continued exposure to his voice.

“Yeah,” I said (how sophisticated). “We really should hang out more. Maybe you could come to one of mine and Jay’s music sessions.” I thanked whatever mysterious entity that controlled our lives for bringing some semblance of intelligent conversation to the moment.

“That’d be interesting. I don’t think anyone’s tried mixing electric guitar with symphony music.”

I smiled to myself. “I wouldn’t call what we play ‘symphony’.” It was more like cacophony, actually.

“Then what would you call it?” He wanted to know. The way he spoke was just so…sincere. To be honest, I don’t know how I managed to even think straight.

“It goes beyond definition,” was all I could think of to say.

“Describe it then,” Dan led me to a sofa and sat down and the swirling lights illuminated his features.

I sat down next to him and crossed my legs, letting my skirt hike up a little bit. But only a little bit. I can’t say whether he noticed or not. “It’s beyond description as well.”

“Lost for words?” he asked softly. I could have crawled into his lap right then and there. But I have self-control, unlike certain neighbors of mine who were shamelessly eyeing and mentally undressing poor Adelaide Ross…why do I waste my thoughts on that douchebag?

I looked back at Dan. Clearly, he was waiting for an answer. “I suppose one might say that,” I lowered my eyelashes like a perfect coquette. I don’t know how though; I’m the furthest thing from it.

“I didn’t know Cassie could be lost for words,” he said. And then he giggled. And it was the cutest giggle ever.

“It’s a product of circumstance.” Lame answer, but I couldn’t manage to think when he was looking at me. Only at me. And I wanted to just grab him and press his lips against mine. I would have, had someone not grabbed his shoulder from behind and pulled him away.

Aiden did just that. “Come on Danny-boy, let’s dance.” He threw me a dirty look as he walked away with my prize. And sadly, Dan didn’t look back at all. Not once.

I uncrossed my legs and breathed. Breathing takes away the tension. Breathing melts the irritation. Breathing…fuck breathing. I needed drinks. I got up and pushed my way through the gyrating crowd. Where the hell was Charlie?