‹ Prequel: Purple Hearts

Hope

Time To Tell Him

“What is it Billie? What’s wrong?” Franky said, her heart beating fast, worrying about what he had to say to her.

But Billie must have noticed the concern in her voice and came to her straight away, wrapping his strong, tattooed arms around her and drawing her close to him. He kissed her on the top of her head like he’d always done.

“Hey, its nothing sweetheart,” he murmured, his breath hot against her head. “Nothing to worry about just, I want to take things slowly with you. I want to be with you but…you have Hope to take into consideration, I don’t want to rush you into anything so…lets take it slow, huh?” he said putting his hand to her face to get her to look at him.

She looked slightly relieved. “I thought you were going to say it wasn’t going to work or something, that you’d changed your mind and say that it wouldn’t work out between us,”

“God no, I want to be with you Franky, I’ve waited so long but we’ve got a whole lifetime to be together, lets take it slowly, you get to know your little Hope and we’ll see each other as often as we can. But I’m going away again tomorrow, just over to…Ireland for a little while, I’m working on something with…Bono and…we’re just finishing it off, I don’t want to say anything about it yet. I shall miss you but will speak to you every day.”

“I’m going to miss you too, it seems as if you’ve only got back and we’ve hardly spent any time together,” said Franky, sadly. Why was this happening? They were so near yet it felt as if they were so far apart. She just wanted to be with him but she knew he was right; she needed to get to know her little girl properly. Of course he was right. He always was.

Suddenly she got up and wandered over to the fireplace and glanced at the photographs on the top of the mantle shelf, photographs that were just of Billie and his boys, the pictures of Adrienne were now put away. The small dish with Billie’s picks inside was there and she reached for one of them, the purple one that stood out amongst all the others and took it out, turning it over and over in her hand.

It was time to tell him.

She was going to tell him right now before he flew off once more to Ireland. She was going to tell him that he could be Hope’s father.

She turned to tell him but as she did so she heard a key in the door.

“Hey, that must be Joey, he said he might come over this evening after Hope’s homecoming,” said Billie leaving the room to greet his son and leaving Franky standing there, once more the moment she should be telling Billie about Hope having disappeared.

When was she going to do it now? It would have to be when she got back from Ireland. She’d have to do it then.

**

“She’s so gorgeous,” said Julia looking at little Hope. Little Hope had woken a short time ago and Julia had watched lovingly as Tre had given her a bottle of milk. She knew then that she desperately wanted to have his child, knowing what a great father he was and wanting to share this with him and their own baby.

**

“She’s a bitch.” Said Emily. “How can she be so rude? What have you ever done to her?” She said. They were lying in bed, it was pretty late and Ramona had told Emily about what Ellie had said to her earlier on.

“She just doesn’t like it that Joey and I are good friends.” Said Ramona turning to face Emily.

“Yeah but…you’d like it to be more than that though wouldn’t you?” Said Emily watching her friend blush.

“I don’t know Emily. I’ve liked Joey for so long, I knew he had this thing for Franky a while ago but it was kept quiet, he used to take stuff from her and he used to take loads of photographs of her when he thought nobody was looking.”

“But you were looking, right?” Said Emily.

“Of course. Looking at him but he doesn’t like me like that, he likes skinny girls.”

“But you’re not fat!” said Emily, shocked at Ramona’s comments.

”I think I am,” said Ramona.

“You’re not fat for god’s sake, I don’t believe you, you have a great figure.”

“I’d just love to be as skinny as Franky,” said Ramona.

”Well I think Franky’s too skinny and you have a great figure.”

But Ramona didn’t answer her. Emily knew her friend was a little hung up on Joey she just hoped she wasn’t going to do something stupid like stop eating. Ramona liked her food and so did she; she’d make sure she’d look out for her. But that bloody bitch Ellie, skinny bitch Ellie had a lot to answer for.

**

“So do you think that Billie and Franky will make a go of it?” Said Julia looking at Tre. He was making them a hot milky drink to keep them awake in case little Hope woke up before Franky got in.

“Well Billie was telling me earlier that he thought he was too old for Franky.”

“He’s being stupid, they’re meant to be together, they’re good together, you can see it.”

“I know but I talked to him and said that age doesn’t mean anything and that Franky wants to be with him. I just hope she tells him that Hope could be his before he…before he goes away again.” Said Tre.

“He’s going away again? But he’s only just got back,” said Julia.

“Yeah but…he’s doing something with…Bono and…its almost complete.” Said Tre.

“You miss it don’t you?” Said Julia. “You know, playing with them. I’d have loved to have heard you all.”

“Yeah I miss it, I miss everything about what we had but…” Tre said, then shrugged, “there’s nothing I can do about it. It’s over. Anyway, lets change the subject,” he said. “Did I tell you that in three day’s time there’s a new band playing in Berkeley?”

“No. What new band?” Said Julia.

”I’ve heard they’re going to be big. Mike wants me to…take a look so how about we make a night out of it, I’ll let everyone know and we can go listen to this band.”

“All of us?” Said Julia.

”Yeah, it’ll do us all good to have a night out and this band are meant to be amazing,” said Tre looking away.

Julia felt sorry for him; she knew he missed playing and the whole atmosphere of being in a band. Of course she’d go with him. She’d do anything to make him happy.

“Yeah, lets go see this band then, you want me to call everyone up and arrange it?” She said.

But he didn’t answer because little Hope was crying and they both left the kitchen and went to her.

**

Just as Billie and Joey entered the room, Franky’s phone rang. She saw her Dad’s name flash up.

“Dad? Is she OK?” Said Franky.

“Of course she is sweetheart but she won’t settle for us, I think she needs some little mother love, especially as it’s her first night at home.” Said Tre.

“I’m leaving now anyway,” said Franky glancing over at Billie who was staring at her, “I’ll see you soon.” Then she snapped her phone shut.

She felt torn. She wanted to get home to her child but she wanted to stay with Billie too. She wanted to snuggle up in bed with him, talk the night away, cuddle and make love. She’d only been with him once, that once when she’d woken up feeling that it had been wrong because he’d still been married and feeling so very guilty.

When would they be together? When could she snuggle up and just hold on to him?

“I’ll see you out,” said Billie.

“Bye Joey, see you soon,” said Franky looking at Billie’s son who had once had a crush on her but he seemed distant as though something was bothering him. She wondered what it was but she was sure that he wouldn’t share any of his feelings with her anyway, especially now. She wondered what he really thought about her being with his father.

“Give that beautiful baby a huge kiss from me,” said Billie. “I love you. Very much.” He said as he drew her to him and she just wanted to stay there but knew she couldn’t.

“I love you too. Let me know when you arrive in Ireland. Am I allowed to know anything about what you have up your sleeve?” said Franky smiling at Billie but also knowing that whatever it was he was planning he wasn’t going to tell.

He smiled his toothy, familiar grin and just shook his head and patted his nose.

“I thought not,” she said pecking him on his cheek and as he closed the door behind her she once more felt so alone.

She just wanted to be a family with Billie, she wanted him to be the father of Hope but something deep inside her told her that it might not be him.

She needed to speak to her father and Julia, to discuss with them how she could find out who the father was first before she told anyone.

**

“Jen! Jen! Wake up, Sam needs feeding,” said Mike. This was the third time Sam had woken and Jen just wasn’t interested. What the fuck was wrong with her? He couldn’t go out tomorrow and just leave her but he had to go out tomorrow, it was something important that he had to attend but he also knew he couldn’t leave Sam alone with Jen. Then he thought of Ramona, Emily and Estelle. They’d come over while he was out, he was sure of it but something would have to be done about Jen, he’d make sure he called the doctor first thing in the morning.

He let Jen sleep on and went to get his beautiful son out of his crib hoping that his mother would come to her senses soon, she was missing out on so much.

**

“Goodnight sweet pea,” said Franky as she laid Hope into her cot. It was 2am and she’d fed and changed little Hope but funnily she didn’t feel tired. All she kept thinking about was the fact that Billie wasn’t going to be around again and she needed to find out how she could find out the truth about who was Hope’s father.

She put the night light on and after turning to check her daughter once more, left the bedroom and headed off downstairs to get some water and painkillers. She had a headache coming and wanted to take some pills now, before the headache got worse.

Her Dad was in the kitchen when she got there, he had what looked like a songbook in his hand but as soon as he saw her he snapped the book shut.

“Hey, are you not tired honey?” said Tre putting the book away into a bag.

”No, I’m just…thinking about how I’m going to tell Billie about Hope.” She said going to the kitchen cupboard to get out a glass.

“So you didn’t get to tell him this evening?” Said Tre, sighing.

She knew her father was cross about this.

”Joey turned up as I was about to tell him,” said Franky but she was sure her father thought she was lying. “It’s the truth Dad.”

“He needs to know,” said Tre as he watched Franky pop a few painkillers into her mouth.

“Yeah but…I think…may be…I think I would rather know who the father was first before I told him. If he’s not the father, if its Gerard or James then he need never know. I just don’t know how to go about it.”

“I was talking to Julia about that and she said that you have to get DNA samples from everyone. Its costly but…you’ll finally know.”

“DNA samples?”

“Yeah, like a piece of hair or something,” said Tre.

“How am I going to do that? I don’t speak to Gerard anymore and I don’t know where James is.”

“I’m sure there’s a way around it. We’ll talk tomorrow and I have a surprise for you, in a few day’s time we’re going to see some great band, you’ll love them and it’ll do you good to get out.”

“Dad I’ve just had a baby, how can I go out?”

“She can come too. It’ll be fine.”

“I’m not so sure,” said Franky as she said goodnight to her Dad. Why the fuck would she want to take her newborn baby to see some noisy band play when she had so much going on in her mind.

Was she ever going to find out who Hope’s father was?