It's A Shame I'm A Dream

When he woke up the next morning, Aiden groaned when he saw that his eyes were unattractively swollen. Luckily, his mother had already abandoned him at the house, so he assumed today was a busy day for her. The clock read eight-fifteen, which meant Brad was already in class. Supposedly. Aiden couldn’t be sure what his younger brother was up to these days.

He tried taking a shower and washing his face, but his eyes remained resolute. It looked stupid. It would be just his luck if, ditching school for the day, he ran into someone he knew with his eyes in this state. Boys didn’t cry.

So, he ended up changing into a white t-shirt, light blue skinny jeans, and his purple jacket, and grabbed his keys off the kitchen counter. He was headed to the beach.

Of course, when he pulled into the Half-Moon Bay parking lot and cut the ignition, he realized that the swelling had gone completely. Oh well. He definitely wasn’t going back to school now.

The sand was unstable under his sneakers, so Aiden pulled off his shoes and socks and held them in his hand. The closer he got to the waves, the more insistent the sea breeze was on his face and hair; the sand crumbled beneath his toes. As always, the sky was dreary grey. In either direction there were scatterings of beings, but not as many as there would usually be, since it was a weekday. The closest group of people looked to be about Aiden’s age, but they must’ve been from a different school because he didn’t recognize them.

Right up against the edge just beyond the reach of the icy waters, Aiden sat down. He placed his shoes by his side and drew his knees to his chest, gazing out to the distant horizon. He felt utterly at peace here; it was the place he held a special bond with. Seven years ago his cousin Shane had come to visit and tagged along to the Walkers’ day at the beach. Shane was almost like Aiden’s younger brother. He had drowned in the surf, rescued but unable to be revived.

Aiden wasn’t quite sure why Shane’s death did not rattle him as much as he probably should have been rattled. Thinking back, the ocean breath brushing softly at his hair, maybe it was because when he’d been trying to force air back into Shane’s limp body, channeling his freshman CPR class, he’d been ultimately aware of Shane’s face, waiting for any spark of life. That was when Aiden had realized – Shane’s face was trapped in a permanently tranquil countenance. As if what he’d last seen had been nothing frightening, as if everything under the surface of the ominous water was only peace and comfort.

What was it like to die? He didn’t know if Taylor’s way had been quick. He prayed it had. But…coming to think of it…how had she committed suicide…?

“Hi,” came a tentative voice from his left. Startled out of his reverie, Aiden look round at a petite girl with short white-blond hair. Her eyes were a striking blue, contrasting with the backdrop of grey sky. She was wearing an oversized navy UC Davis hoodie and charcoal skinny jeans.

“Hey,” replied Aiden mildly. Behind her and a few feet away, he noticed a small cluster of what had to be her friends. One boy especially was watching the petite blonde almost protectively.

“I was just – wondering – ah… Are you okay?” There was no mocking edge, no curiosity; it rang with pure sincerity and worry. Aiden was taken aback. Had she seen through him so easily? Surprising him further, she dropped gently into a crouch beside him. The boy who was watching was looking positively suspicious now.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Aiden was stupefied to find himself comfortable and reassured by this stranger. Her natural charisma cloaked him in trust and understanding. She registered his staring at her friends and said, almost laughingly, to answer him: “Oh, don’t worry about them. They’ll live without me for a while.” She paused. “If you want to talk about it, I won’t tell.”

“How did you – ?”

She only gazed back at him serenely.

“Um…” Aiden cleared his throat but it did no good. Instead, he pulled out his phone. He did want to talk about it, and there was something about this girl. “I’ll call you later?”

She smiled before she took his outstretched phone and began programming in her number with nimble fingers.

He thought he saw something broken in her smile, or maybe the ocean was making him wistful.