Aurora

I wandered around the dark, dense forest, knee-deep in snow. A sense of urgency and fear clutched at my heart, making me sick. There was something I was looking for, somewhere I was supposed to be, someone I was supposed to be with. The trees stretched on forever, and along with them, the black night. The depths of the darkness were almost tangible, it was as if they were pressing down on my body. Through the trees I could hear whispering but couldn't make out what the voices were saying. All I knew was that it was a secret I needed to know. It was something I needed to understand. I trudged on through the snow, just searching for an answer, any answer, but finding none.

Then, finally, I saw a figure before me. His back was turned to me. I began to run to him, but my legs were lead. I couldn't get close enough to him, but my body was screaming to me. This man, whoever he was, was important. He was someone I had to see, had to know, had to touch. I wanted to shout to him, but my lungs ached. He began to turn to me, then, as if by some miracle he knew I was there. I tried to run faster, but as I saw his smiling face, I realized my legs would take me no further, no matter how hard I tried. He was so beautiful it made my heart ache, I wanted him to be mine, he had to be mine.

But then he turned away and began to walk off. I tried to scream again but when I finally found my voice I realized I did not know his name. He soon disappeared in the trees and no matter how fast I ran, I could never catch up to him. I kept running and running until fear almost consumed me...

My cheeks were wet and when I let my fingertips brush over them, I realized I'd been crying. Why? I recalled my dream and for a moment it felt so real that I did want to cry again. I rolled onto my back then, pulled the furs up to my chin and sighed to the ceiling of my tower room. It was just a dream. You were wandering around the forest for months, Aurora. Surely you will have nightmares about it. At least you remember nothing, so nothing can hurt you. As I thought these words, however, I wondered if they were actually true. That dream frightened me more than anything ever had. Something, and I couldn't tell what it was, was wrong. There was something wrong here. Maybe it was the castle, maybe it was the girls, maybe it was Delphine.

Or maybe it was me.

I took a deep breath and sat up, banishing those thoughts and the door opened. In sauntered Magdalena, a smile on her face. "Awake? Fantastic, we're going into town today. You must come with us. All the little girls are dying to see you anyway. They were asleep when we brought you in last night. Here, I'll help you dress." She was all a-twitter as she helped me out of bed. My legs almost felt shaky, as if my dream had been real and I'd really been trying to walk and run miles through deep snow. Just a dream, I reminded myself.

It was then that I noticed something glittering on Magdalena's left hand. I took her hand within mine immedietly and saw the unmistakable ring. It was simple, but lovely. "You are...engaged? To Stefan?" I questioned, my heart leaping into my throat.

Magdalena smiled, which turned into a grin, which turned into tears as she embraced me around the neck. "I wish you had been here. We had such a lovely party. Well, what matters is that you're here now and you'll be able to attend the wedding. It's at the end of the month." She pulled away and wiped the tears from my eyes. "Ah! I have become such a sap. I am just so happy. Stefan is purching a small lodge a little ways from the village. He's going to start building things...chairs, tables, beds, what have you...we won't be rich, that is true, but we'll be happy enough. Oh Aurora, I cannot wait to have a family of my own, with the one man I truly love with all my heart." She grasped onto my hands. "If only I could find you such a man."

For some reason my mind instantly flashed to the beautiful man from my dream, the one with dark hair and eyes like stars, but then I shook the picture off and laughed. "Magdalena, you know my duties lie here. I shall someday take over Delphine's place." For some reason, the thought that had filled me with so much horror for so long now did not bother me. I marveled at the fact that I only felt a sort of detached interest as I thought of my future. What had happened to me? Why was it that I had changed so much?

"Still..." Magdalena faded. "Come, let me help you dress." She dressed me in a bright tunic and skirt and plaited my hair with bright purple and orange ribbons. I looked at my hands and noticed on one of my wrists a glittering tattoo. I tried to rub it away, but it would not go. It warmed my fingers when I touched it, though, and I felt not so lonely for a moment. But when I took my fingers off the golden tattoo, the feeling vanished. "Summer is coming, can you feel it?" Magdalena asked. "The snow on the ground will finally begin to melt and the girls will begin to play outside..."

"You'll have to come and visit me, Magdalena," I said and now I did feel a little sadness. My dearest friend was going to have a family, was moving on. "I am sure that you won't be able to make it up here too much, however." I saw her confused look in the mirror and laughed. "You'll be pregnant, I bet!"

Magdalena flushed. "Oh yes. I suppose I will." Her voice was pleased. "I'm looking forward to having children. Small little bundles who have Stefan's flaxen hair..." For a moment I closed my eyes and saw tiny children with dark hair and blue eyes. When I opened my eyes, I found myself staring at the forest. "Are you all right, Aurora? You have such a distant look to you." Magdalena ran a hand over my braid. "I'll come visit all I can, I promise you that. And I will find a man for you, one who does not mind living at Lunarenstein with all the rest of the girls...I'm sure there must be someone like that around here." I let her talk. I didn't want to tell her that at that moment I was filled with such an intense longing for something I could not even name. Every single problem I'd once had seemed so silly now compared to the crippling ache in my heart.

At once, I shook myself out of it and smiled at my friend. "Thank you," I said, and arose from my seat. "Let us go downstairs. I want to see the younger ones." I followed Magdalena down the stairs and marveled at how little Lunarenstein had changed. While it felt like just yesterday I'd wanted nothing more to be free from this place, I knew it had been many months. I felt something restless within me, but did not let it bother me, at least, not too much.

The girls were much changed, which made me realized I truly had been gone for some time. They were taller, their eyes were brighter, their hair, glossier. They crowded around me and embraced my torso, mumbling their happiness at my being back home. A smile came to my face as I touched the head of each of my small girls. For a moment, I was troubled by a sense the same sense I'd had when I first woke up. The feeling that something terrible was about to happen to these girls and there was absolutely nothing I could do to stop it. I stared at Magdalena, who only smiled at the scene, and then looked back at the small heads that were grinning their gap-toothed grins up at me. I blinked for a moment and saw an expanse of dark trees. Now, however, I was filled with a sense of dire urgency. Gone was the feeling of detached interest at being the mistress of Schloss Lunarenstein. I had to leave. I had to go to the forest. I had to...

"Aurora!" Magdalena's arms were at my shoulders. "Girls, I think I'm going to take Aurora to get some fresh air. Would any of you like something from town?" she questioned. The girls made their requests, which I registered distantly, and then Magdalena led me outside.

"Wait a moment, Magdalena, is it Saturday? Why are we allowed to go to town without Delphine and the others?"

Magdalena shook her head as we headed towards the open carriage. "Delphine instructed me to take you into town. She says you must have had quite an ordeal, and she wanted you to get out before she came to see you. She's worried you have had some sort of...shock. And, frankly, Aurora, I do not blame her in the slightest. You're not yourself." She tucked me into the carriage and then got in herself. "I understand, truly I do, I just wish there was something more I could do to help."

The fresh air calmed my nerves enough so I was able to answer. "I do feel different, Magdalena. I...do not know. I have this awful feeling...like I've got to do something, like I've got to be somewhere."

"The forest?" I nodded. Magdalena frowned in sympathy. "Oh Aurora, we will have you feeling like yourself again soon, I know we will." I didn't answer. I appreciated her words when I did not believe them. The detached interest in regards to my future was still present, and yet, so was the fear of being there. The feelings were a constriction in my throat, a thump in my chest. Why did I feel this way? I closed my eyes as the carriage pulled away and forced myself to remember something from what had happened. For a moment everything was black. And then for some reason, a single image came to my mind: a thousand glittering people all dancing in a golden ballroom. Just for a moment I saw that, and then it was gone.

My head ached and felt fuzzy. I took a deep breath. "I will be okay," I said out loud, more to myself than Magdalena.

The village was quiet as we neared the center of town. "I hope you don't mind if we stop by Stefan's father's house," Magdalena quipped. "I've not been round in a couple days and want to see how he's faring. It's been tricky getting our wedding organized while I'm still at Lunarenstein and he is at his own home. But soon I will show you the house he's purchased for us! He's doing a splendid job building all the furniture, and, if you can believe it, I've been sewing! Curtains, a cloth to cover our table...Delphine had a fit when she saw me sewing, but I reminded her that once I'm married I'll be off her back. She wasn't too happy that I'm not going to be a wild woman, but we always knew that one day...one day we wouldn't be so wild anymore."

I stared at my friend's anxious face. "Yes," I answered resolutely. "You are completely right. We cannot be wild girls forever."

She took my hands as the carriage stopped. "You will be all right," she assured me, however, for some reason it seemed as if she was reassuring herself as well. "Let us stop into the tavern first. Gregori is probably there." Magdalena bundled my shawl tighter around my shoulders and led me into the dark tavern. Things had not changed, thankfully. It only felt like a few days that I had not been here, not a few months. It was still dark and dingy, but warm and comforting at the same time. The same people were crowded around tables and at the bar, with the exception of the absence of Stefan and the addition of a new, unfamiliar woman clad in a dirty burgundy gown.

However, when the woman turned towards Magdalena and I, I realized that the woman was not unfamiliar in any way. Rosalyn stared at Magdalena and I and I did my best not to let my jaw fall. Why was Rosalyn here so early in the day, wearing nothing but a old, dirty gown? Come to think of it, her hair was mussed and her face was painted in such a way that hinted at...

"Oh! Aurora!" she exclaimed and rushed towards me, embracing me like a sister. I tensed in her arms. Where was the Rosalyn who had teased me so with Niamh? Where was the haughty Rosalyn, the insulting Rosalyn, the mean Rosalyn, the Rosalyn who did whatever she pleased? "I am so happy to see you..." she pulled away and her face contorted in confusion. "When you left I thought there was no hope left. Niamh told Delphine about what happened and they kicked me out...but now that you're here I am sure everything will once again be good, oh Aurora, you must help me..."

Magdalena pulled me away. "Come, Aurora, Gregori isn't here today. We shall go to their house. Surely they are home." She flashed a glance at Rosalyn, who looked wretched.

"But, Magdalena...Aurora..." her voice sounded defeated, helpless. I shivered. Gone was her hauteur, her attitude, her cockiness. We were out of the tavern before I could hear her say anything else, and she did not follow us. I wondered what she did in there all day long, and then I did not wonder, because I was sure I already knew. I could not help looking at Magdalena for answers. "Niamh discovered that Rosalyn had been inviting men into Lunarenstein for awhile. Years, even. She told Delphine. Delphine is quite lax about these things, she never chastised me about Stefan, however...she felt it was necessary that Rosalyn move on. She didn't supply Rosalyn with a reference or a letter of introduction or anything, though, so she is quite alone. I do feel badly for her, but Delphine made it clear that we shouldn't...speak to her."

I shook my head. "She acted as if we were close friends when she has been nothing but hateful to me all my life. I wonder why."

"I cannot tell you that, Aurora. I am sure she simply wants any sort of help she can get. I would try and help her but there is nothing I can do." There was something in Magdalena's voice that made me think it wasn't only about that. She felt that Rosalyn deserved her fate, I knew. I'd known Magdalena long enough to know that sort of thing. She was too nice to admit something like that aloud, but I knew in thought, she did not feel too sorry for Rosalyn.

Both Stefan and Gregori gave their wishes of my good health when we visited Magdalena's future husband. I thanked them accordingly and cast my eyes upon the couple. My friend and her husband-to-be looked happy together, something that jolted and warmed my heart. They were a good match - Stefan with his quiet smile and Magdalena with her radiant beauty. They would have wonderful children and live modestly, but happily. Still, her happiness tugged at something deep inside me. It wasn't jealousy exactly, I'd known true jealousy before, that was to be sure, but it wasn't a good feeling. I pushed it away, though. I would get better. I would not feel this distant ache forever. Eventually I would grow to love Lunarenstein and my life. Eventually things would be the way they were before. I would stop caring about the months of my life that seemed blank, I would stop staring at the forest whenever I could, I would stop seeing a handsome face behind my eyelids every time I blinked.

Eventually we returned to the castle, where Magdalena showed me the dress she was making for her wedding. It was a lovely creation of a soft white cotton. She'd added orange ribbons throughout its design, a tribute to the colorful clothes we wore at Lunarenstein. As she showed me all the details of the dress, she gleamed. "I was afraid I wouldn't be able to show you this dress. You cannot begin to understand my joy at your return. I am so happy you are home."

I smiled then, a smile I was sure did not reach my eyes. "Yes. Yes, I am happy I'm home as well."

A week passed in that fashion. Delphine gave a rare smile when she saw me, patted my head and told me she was happy that I was home. She did not seem to concerned at where I'd been for the last few months, but somehow I didn't care at all that she never asked. For a few days I pondered at why I no longer wanted her attention or approval, but then I simply came to the conclusion that I had grown out of wanting her to love me. I no longer needed her affection. I was happier without it. Niamh's beetle-black eyes glittered at me when she saw me for the first time and something caused me to shrink away from her. She welcomed me home and I did not believe her. This was the girl who had forced Rosalyn out. Had they not been the best of friends? I could not forget Rosalyn's dirty, painted face. Ileana and Lise had not changed at all. They gave me warm embraces and kind words.

As hard as I tried, however, I could not shake the anxiety. At night I was plagued by the same nightmares, during the day I found myself staring at the forest. I could remember a time when I had stared, wishing to be a part of it, wishing to be a wolf. Now, I felt as if there was something deep in the forest that I had to find. And when I thought of the wolves, anger coursed through me. I had never thought of them as evil creatures before, but for some reason now...now I only wished to hurt them.

One day, as I stood in my room getting dressed for the day, I spied the flowers on my bedside table. They were braided into a lovely ring and though they were not connected to their roots anymore, they had not wilted or died at all since my return. My fingers went to their petals and for a moment they stung my fingers. Only for a moment, however. Then, on an impulse, I took the crown from the table and placed it on my head. For some reason, it gave me calm. It was almost as if meeting an old friend. Delphine frowned when she saw it, but made no audible noise against the crown. We did not talk much these days, as if we had talked that much before. I liked not dealing with her, though. It seemed easier this way.

Exactly one week after my return, Lise pulled me from the library where I was skimming over a book of fairytales and dragged me outside. The sky was fading purple as twilight came over the clearing "Aurora, come, you must come," her voice was breathy and anxious, just like my beating heart. We raced outside where Delphine and the other girls stood. I came to the right of my mother, where, as future mistress of Schloss Lunarenstein, I was supposed to stand. At the edge of the forest I could make out forms. Shapes. Human in nature.

Then, a group of humans stepped out from the forest, but in an instant I knew they were wolves. At the front was a large man with wide shoulders and a full beared. His eyes held amusement and he stared directly at...me. I flushed and looked away from him. Beside him was a twisted looking man with sallow skin and haunted eyes. At one time he might have been handsome, but now he simply looked...old. Next to him stood the most beautiful young woman I'd ever seen. Her features were sharped, they matched her yellow hair that was slashed at her chin. And then on the other side of the man in front, I saw the beautiful young man from my nightmares.

Instantly I felt sick. My knees shook, fire shook my heart. I felt angry with him, betrayed by him...but why? I had never seen this man in my entire life, save for my dreams. And yet it was as if I'd known him for so long. His dark skin, black eyes, and dark hair pulled back. I'd never seen someone so beautiful. I closed my eyes for a moment and saw this man again, but this time, his face was bathed in orange firelight and he was looking at me as if I was the only person in the entire world...

Shaking myself out of my dreams I focused my attention on the man in front. "Greetings, daughters of Artemis." His tone was jocular, but his words hinted at malice. "I come with a warning. The Princess of the Moon hides in your castle. She is not yours to have. Tonight, at the stroke of midnight, our forces will attack the girls of this castle to take back what is ours." He looked at me first and then to Delphine. "Good woman, I implore you. Give us the Princess of the Moon and no one will be harmed. If you do not, I cannot guarantee there will be any survivors."

Ileana, who stood next to me, flashed me a puzzled look and I shrugged. We did not have this so-called Princess of the Moon, as far as I knew. "You are mistaken, wolves," Delphine replied. "We do not have the Princess of the Moon."

The man, who I could only assume was the leader of the wolves, raised an eyebrow. He looked at me once more. "You, child, what is your name?" There was something funny about the way he spoke those words. Almost as if he were having a private joke with himself.

I swallowed. "I am Aurora. Aurora of Lunarenstein." I turned up my chin, hoping to show him that he did not intimidate me, even though he did. "I assure you, wolf, we do not have the Princess of the Moon. You are the ones who have our Silver Queen be captured by Death's Lady. You are the ones who protect The Liche Queen. Even if we did have the Princess of the Moon, we would not let you have her. You would kill her, surely."

The wolves laughed, save the one from my nightmares. "You are an astute lady, my good Aurora." The leader of the wolves grinned. He nodded and looked back to Delphine. "You have until midnight, mistress. At that time, we shall attack the castle. You will not win." With that, the wolves began back into the forest and the girls back into the castle. I did not follow them immediately, however, and the handsome man from my dreams paused and turned back to me. His eyes rested on mine, and I felt as if he could see into my soul. For some reason, my fingers went to the strange golden tattoo on my wrist. The man caught my movement and stared at me. A wind passed against my cheek. Aurora, I heard for a moment. A man's voice. My fingers instantly pulled away from the mark on my skin and I followed my sisters back into the castle, doing my best not to look back.

I couldn't. I looked back again. The man was standing at the edge of the forest, the darkening light making him a fuzzy picture. I could not tell if he was looking back at me. My heart ached in my chest in anger and confusion. Then, finally, I tore my gaze off of him and went inside. Back into Lunarenstein, back with my sisters...back where I belonged.