Australia

Nicks POV

I sighed as I flopped myself into the seat of the plane. I stretched my legs out in front of me a let my head loll back against the head rest. So, it was officially official. Sam and Joe were a couple in both public and private. I shook my head at myself.

What were you thinking Nick? my mind yelled at me. Did you really think that you had a chance with Sam? Really?

I nodded my head as my mind responded to the voices.

Yes, actually I really did.

I closed my eyes and thought back to the day Sam and i had spent together; just us. The breakfast, the nature walk that resulted in her wearing my shirt for the rest of the day, the mini golf, the picnic and the swimming. The swimming was what made me get my hopes up. It was so stereotypical. We were swimming, giggling and chasing each other like couples do on television and in movies. What really stood out for me that day were the events in the tree house.

We walked through the side gate and into the backyard. I put the basket down and turned to face Sam.

"Thank you for an amazing day, Sam" I pulled her into a hug, which she obliged. "It means a lot."

"Well, it’s not exactly over yet," she told me.

"What?" I glanced at her; confused.

"We haven't done something you want to do yet," she smiled at him.

I thought for a minute before walking inside.
"Stay here," I told Sam. I ran upstairs and pulled my blanket off my bed.

"There's something I want to show you," I told Sam and her eyes lit up.
"Where are we going?" Sam's voice was laced with anxiousness and excitement.

"I'll show you," I interlaced my fingers through hers and was over the moon when she squeezed my hand. I pulled her towards the back of the garden, stopping at the foot of the steps up to the tree house.

"The tree house?" she looked at me skeptically.

"Go. Up." I let go of her hand.

She climbed the stairs, and I followed.

"Wow!" I heard Sam exclaim when she emerged.

When I popped my head up, I saw Sam standing there looking around. I smiled and clambered up the final stairs and moved over to stand beside Sam.

"What do you think?" I asked her, a proud smile plastered on my face.

"It’s awesome!" she hugged me. "It has such a Nick flair."

I had to agree with her. The windows were able to be covered with plastic, so I few old song books were scattered on the floor. My old guitar sat up against a bookshelf. I had some old posters stuck up on the walls. She smiled at me before walking to one of the windows. I followed her.

"It's a full moon," she smiled at me, before looking longingly at the moon. "I used to want to be an astronaut."

"Really?" I smirked at her sudden admission.

"Yeah," she nodded at me, she moon shining in her eyes. "I was so fascinated by all things space when I was younger. I was amazed that there were so many stars and that the moon was stuck up there. When I learned about it in school, I didn't believe my teacher when she said how far away it was, and how big. I always thought it was like a big cookie."

I smiled at her. I was learning things I didn't know about her. She continued.

"Then, when I saw my first shooting star, I told my mum that the moon must’ve been angry at the star so he was divorcing him. Mind you, I was seven and that just after my parents’ divorce. After that I wanted to be a ballerina." She moved to sit down against one the walls. I sat beside her, covering us both with the blanket.

"I practiced and practiced. But, with my mum being single at the time we couldn't afford it. When my mum met my, now stepdad, we could afford things again. My mum asked me if I wanted to continue ballet. I told her it was too girly. I was friends with Tash then, and she was a tomboy. I guess it kind of rubbed off on me. That's when I joined soccer. I played soccer from age 10 to 15. I loved it. But I got bored of it. So, for the last 2 years I've been concentrating on school, until I finished at the end of last year." She looked up at me; eyes watering at the memories.

"Graduation was devastating. I really liked school and my friends. Tash, who was surprisingly dux, which I guess is our version of valedictorian, wrote a super corny speech about being friends forever. It brought most of us to tears. I went to an all girl’s school by the way. Ironically enough, when our formal dinner came around, no one was talking to anybody. It was awkward as hell." She shrugged and sat back, resting her head on my shoulder.

"Through all of this drama, I was listening to you guys. You pulled me out of a depressive spiral," she admitted. She showed me her wrists. White, almost clear scars sat across them both. I looked at her with worried eyes. "Don't worry Nick. I'm all better now. And, truth be told, I have you three and Tash to thank. You saved me."

She looked up at me again, tears in her eyes. I glanced at my watch, noticing the time was shortly before 10pm. Sam shifted and laid her head in my lap, facing upwards. I brushed her hair off her face.

"You want to know what I was thinking about the other night?" I offered.

"You don't have to," she told me, half smiling. "I didn't win."

"But I want to," I confessed. I really did want to get this off my chest. "I promise."

Sam positioned herself so she could look at me properly.

I took a deep breath and started.

"I was thinking about you," I confessed, running my fingers through her still damp hair. She leaned up and pulled the hair ties out of it. "I was running through a million what ifs. What if I was the first one you saw when you woke up after you passed out? What if I was the one holding your hand at the end of that cat walk thing? What if I was the one you had fallen for?"

"Nick," she started.

"No, please let me get this out," I pleaded and she fell silent. She pulled the blanket over her shoulder and turned onto her side, facing me, her head still in my lap. "I'm not going to lie to you. Imagining you with Joe hurts a lot, and not because I'm jealous like Joe thinks. But, it’s because I feel like I could be so much better for you. I wouldn't go so far as to say I'm in love with you. But I do feel something. I don't know what it is. It’s stronger than what I've felt for other girls. The only reason I haven't told you sooner is because of Joe and that he would hate me if I started liking you."

"But, you already do," she stated the obvious. "And Joe does know."

"How?" I looked at her; continuing to play with her hair.

"Apparently it’s obvious," she smiled at me.

"Great," I sarcastically stated, running my hand through my curls now. I dragged my fingers through the knots that the lake water had produced. She lifted my hand and looked at my watched. 11.58pm. We'd been talking for ages.

"Look Nick," Sam sat up a little, resting her palm on the other side of my legs. She was directly in front of me. "I feel something too. But what I feel for Joe is stronger."

She looked at me with pitying eyes. I didn't want her pity. I just wanted her. I took a chance; pressing my lips to her hairline. I pulled back. She wasn't cringing she was smiling. She slowly leaned in and placed a small kiss on my lips before pulling away, settling herself down into my lap and closing her eyes. I glanced at my watch; the time ticked over to exactly midnight. I smiled and rested my head against the wall behind me; closing my eyes also.

I sighed at the memory. I could still feel that soft kiss on my mouth; even if it had been months. I hate to admit it but what I felt for Sam back then is nothing in comparison to what I felt for her now. It was love now; I knew it. I sighed again.

“Excuse me,” I heard a voice to my right. “I’d like to sit down.”

I glanced up to find Sam smiling down at me.

“What? Why?” I questioned.

“I switched seats with Kevin,” she shrugged; looking me in the eye. “I want to sit next you and talk.”

“Oh, um, a-alright,” I stammered and stood up.

Sam squeezed herself between the seat in front of me and my body. She stopped in between me and the chair and pressed her nose to mine. What was she doing? She pulled back and grinned at me before moving further along and plopping down in the seat by the window. She put her small bag on the floor at her feet and angled herself towards me. She put on her seat belt and leaned the side of her face against the chair. I was completely mesmerized by her lightly dusted freckled expression and her big blue eyes. I felt lost in those eyes.

“You guys have fun, yeah?” Joe’s voice came from the aisle.

I jumped slightly and turned to look at him. I nodded.

“Of course,” I faked a smile. “Where are you sitting?”

He point to two empty seats across the aisle and 4 rows down.

“Down there,” he sighed. “Take care of her for me.”

“I, uh, I will,” I smiled again.

“I’ll see you in Texas babe,” he told Sam; who unbuckled her seatbelt and stood slightly. One of her hands rested on my thigh and the other on the chair in front of me. She pressed a quick peck on Joe’s lips before sitting back down.

“I love you,” she smiled at him.

“Love you too,” he returned the smile and made his way to his seat.

I felt a twinge of guilt and jealousy in the pit of my stomach. Jealousy because it was Joe she loved and guilt because of my thoughts about kissing Sam myself. My thigh burned from where her hand had rested there previously. I dusted the spot off with my hand like I was attempting to put out the fire. I then buckled my seatbelt and Sam did the same. I kept my eyes fixed on the headrest in front of me; desperate for thoughts of Sam to leave my mind. I felt her hand rest on my leg again; closer to my knee then before.

“What’s wrong?” Sam’s worried voice asked me. “You don’t look very good. You’re pale. What’s the matter?”

Oh Sam, I thought. If only you knew.