We Gamble With Desire

“Spencer, wake up.” Alex whispered as he shook me roughly.

“What, Alex?” I asked agitated, as I kept my eyes shut tightly.

“Wake up.” He said laughing as he shook me again.

I groaned and turned around to face him. “What do you need Alexander.”

“For you to pack.” He responded as if it was obvious.

“Umm why? Where are we going…?” I asked confused sitting up on my elbow.

“I told you; my super special secret place.” He said, as excited as a kid talking about going to a candy shop or Disney World.

“When are we going…?” I asked knowing Alex wouldn’t tell me where we were going.

“Tomorrow at eight in the morning.” He said getting up to pick up the small dog that was currently scratching at the wood floor.

“I don’t know Alex…” I said petting Sebastian lightly as he curled in a ball between Alex and me.

“Pleasse Spencer?” He asked giving me his puppy dog eyes and his lower lip stuck out in a pout. “Rian, Jack, Zack, Melissa and Kara are all going.” He bargained.

“You know I don’t like Melissa.” I said grumpy.

“No one but Zack likes Melissa.” He pointed out loudly.

“I know…Kara’s going?” I asked, making sure someone sane would be with me.

“Yes she is, and she loves this place.” He replied smugly.

“What am I supposed to pack? I don’t even know where we’re going.” I complained getting up and walking towards the large dresser that sat to the left of our TV and movie shelves.

“Just pack clothes you’d normally wear around this time; shorts, some pants, shirts, sweatshirts, pajamas.” He replied as he started wrestling with Sebastian.

“Alex, it’s not fair to fight with Baz you are about twenty times bigger than him.” I said laughing as the two played with one of the various tug-o-war toys Sebastian had.

“Spencer, I think you’re supposed to be packing not instructing me and Sebastian.” He said picking up the small dog, looking serious. I started laughing at them as Alex attempted to look intimidating. “Come on Baz, we don’t need her criticism.” He huffed and stood up, heading for the door.

“No Alex!” I called after him as I grabbed his hand. “Help me pack, please? You know I hate packing.” I pouted.

He gave me one of his are-you-serious faces and then smiled. “Fine, but only because you’re cute.” He said as he put Sebastian down and sat next to me on the floor with the red suitcase in between us. “But we have to stop in about fifteen minutes.”

“Why?” I asked confused as I pulled open the drawer that held my shirts.

“Because dinner’ll be ready then.” He said giving me a large smile.

“You made me dinner?” I asked ignoring the packing and looking at him.

“Well you made me lunch.” He said making me smile, Alex never made food; which was probably a good thing on most occasions. “And I was hungry and you’re too cute when you sleep for me to want to wake you up.”

“Alex you’re so cute.” I said pinching his cheek lightly.

He blushed and pulled me in for a light kiss. “Eh, I know.”

“And full of yourself.” I replied bluntly, slapping his cheek lightly.

“Get your clothes out woman.” He said after a moment. I laughed but did as he said, pulling out about ten shirts, three pairs of pajama bottoms, a few basketball shorts, four jean shorts, three pairs of jeans, and two of my sundresses.

“Alex, don’t you think this is too much for clothes?” I asked, interrupting him from folding the clothes.

“Nah, we’re going for over a week, plus I know the weather isn’t always very predictable on top of you tend to change your clothes a lot.” He continued folding them and attempted to fit them all in the one bag. “We should go get our dinner, finish this later.” He said standing up and reaching their hand down towards me.

“Yum.” I said grabbing his hand, finally smelling the food cooking downstairs. “What are we having?”

“Well I made the steaks that were in the fridge, mashed potatoes and gravy, and because I know that if I didn’t you’d yelled at me, some corn and green beans with the seasoning you normally put on.”

“Oh yummy” I said skipping down the hall to the top of the stairs.

Downstairs Alex made me sit down at the table in the kitchen while he brought the various dishes, silverware, and the drinks. Before sitting down he dimmed the light above us a bit and lit the few small candles that sat in the middle of the table.

“Aw Alex, this is all so nice.” I said looking around at all the things.

“Well, I missed you; a lot.” He said grabbing my hand. “Plus I wanted to do something you’d like.”

“Aww, Alex.” I said amazed at all of this. “I’d like whatever you did; I like just being with you.”

“I remember a different story about three years ago now.” He said looking at me accusingly.

“What was three years ago now?” I asked confused, knowing our anniversary was still three months away.

“Three years ago today, I met you at a concert outside The Rave in Milwaukee, Wisconsin.” He said matter-of-factly.

“Really?” I asked surprised he knew the exact date. “Do you remember this every year Al?”

“I could say yes and make you feel bad right now but no, I don’t.” He said putting food on his plate. “I only remembered it because I was randomly looking up the date one day and then when we found out what day we were coming home it just happened to be the same day.”

My mouth opened in the shape of an ‘o’ as he talked. “Well I’m very sorry for the way I acted.”

“You still haven’t told me what was wrong that day, Spence.” He said a bit after the silence we’d fallen into as we ate.

“You sure?” I asked trying to confuse him into changing his answer, knowing full well I hadn’t told him; I was avoiding it.

“Yeah…” He said sounding like he was doubting himself.

“Pretty sure we did have this conversation already Lex.” I said biting a piece of the rare steak. “By the way this is some of the best steak you’ve ever made.” I said honestly.

“Thank you babe.” He said happily changing the subject. “Jack’s coming over tonight to sleep here so he can just stumble out to the car instead of driving over at seven.”

“Oh that’s good Jack doesn’t function properly when, ok Jack doesn’t ever function properly, but it’s worse when it’s early in the morning.” I said still worried he’d return to the previous subject, I didn’t know if he had forgotten or just dropped it.

He laughed at what I was saying. “Very true, Spencer.”

The rest of dinner we talked and laughed about this week—I wanted to know what we were doing—and things we still had to catch up on. After it was over we cleared the table civilly and then headed back upstairs to finish packing before Jack arrived.

“Spencer do you really need three pairs of shoes?” Alex asked amazed.

“Yes I do Alex.” I said pulling out my black low top converse, my brown boots and a pair of random white flip flops.

“Fine as long as you can walk in all of them.” He said returning to his own bag.

“And you’re not bringing along multiple shoes?” I asked accusingly, knowing he was bringing at least three.

“That’s different.” He defended himself.

“Is not; you’re bringing your flip flops, your sandals, your DCs and your Nikes.” I said putting my hands on my hips. “That’s more than me.”

“Fine, I’ll take out the sandals.” He said putting his hands up in defeat.

“No, get rid of the flip flops.” I said, hating when boys wore them.

“But Spencer you know I love them.” He pouted.

“Don’t give me that look.” I said laughing. “Oh that’s not fair.”

“Yay flip flops!” He said taking out the sandals and leaving me to stuff my shoes, shampoo, razor, make-up, and other random items in the bag. “Don’t forget a sweatshirt; you can’t steal mine all week.”

“But I like yours better and I don’t have room.” I whined staring at the bulging bag.

“If I have room after my hair stuff and Sebastian’s stuff you can put it in my bag.” He responded not looking up.

“Baz is coming with us?” I asked happily.

“Yes, I can’t leave him again.” He said picking up the puppy and holding him at eye level, Sebastian reached out and licked his nose lightly.

“DOG SEX!” Jack yelled into our room and then ran back down the stairs.