Forbidden Sunrise

I licked my lips adding a fresh coat of siliva on my pink lips.

I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came out.

Kazaf notice me gaping at him, he cocked a brow "You okay?"

I closed my mouth, ashamed of my nervousness.

I blinked and inhaled sharply "Look, Kazaf....I.."

Again, the words refuse to come out of my mouth. It was frustriating!

"You?" He waited, obviously, confused of my actions.

Say something! I inhaled again.

"Has Dad come home yet?" Stupid question. Grr.

Kazaf shook his head, a worried expression overwhelmed his features.

"No. He hasn't. Oh my God! Rowen! What if something bad happened to him?"

I sunk deeper in the bed. Why can't I say it? Am I afraid or something?

Kazaf looked at my form. His worried expression turned suspicious,

"You know something." He said, his voice full of questions.

I opened my mouth to speak again, but the damn words just won't come out!
Instead I just nodded.

His expression changed now. Was it fury?

"For how long did you know?" He asked.

I simply gulped and he knew what it meant.

"Dear God! Rowen why didn't you say something?" He demanded.

"I was in shock." I said, finally finding my voice.

"Shock?! Dammit Rowen! It's been 5 whole days! and your still in shock?"

My sad and fearfull expression changed,

"You just don't understand do you?! First, Alec drank a potion, then Alec isn't himself I can't find the twin thing anymore, and Gerard leaves me, and Dad's gone. How can that not shock you, when everything in you God foresaken life was taken from you?!" I said, my voice rising.

He went silent for a moment. That gave me the time to breathe.

"Look, Dad's in trouble. Gerard's Dad--"

"Gerard's Dad? I thought he was dead?" He asked,

I blinked. Here it comes. "He lied."

"Then who is Gerard's Dad? Why would he take Rich--" He stopped short, starring at me blankly.

He gets it, he knows.

"No," He said sternly, "NO!"

I shook my head, trying to calm him down.

"Kazaf! Calm down! Please just listen--" He cut my off.

"Calm down? How would I calm down, when all along I have been friends with the Stefan the bastard's son! And you! Falling for him! I knew it something was up! We have to do something..I--" This time it was my turn to cut him off short.

Furry blazed through my system.

"Shut up! Why don't you get it?! Of all the people I thought you would understand! Why don't you understand?! I thought this would be easy! At least of all the people in this damned world you would understand!! But you don't!"

This was the first time I ever screamed at him like this. It hurt me but it was the truth I was sick of his ways.

He became utterly silent.

"Why can't you understand!? You always go off at things that you think would hurt me but look at me!" I stretched my arms wide "I'm not as weak as you think I am! I don't need protection! I studied well to protect myself! I don't even need your stupid potions! I could fight without it! Do you know why me and Dad use your potions?"

I stared at him, tears breaming from my green eyes. He just sat there looking at the floor.

I continued, "Because your my friend. I understood this as a very important thing for you, and it was great your potions helped me not to feel pain when I fight, but it was only physical."

I walked over to him, "Kazaf, you can't always protect me. I'm not weak."

He lifted his head to meet his dark brown eyes with my green eyes.
His eyes were full of remorse as he spoke.

"But he was from the things that hurt you deep inside. I thought it was right of me to those things. To think that way, I was only trying to help you not to be hurt again!"

My eyes glared now, "The only one hurting me is you."

He looked down again. As I breathed again.

"Kazaf, I love him. Stop trying to push me away from Gerard."

"But he left you!" He snapped.

I flinched at his words.

"See? If you would've listen to me--" I cut him short again,

"This is what you do! You try to take things over! Like you kow me! Like I said, you don't understand!" I threw my word at him.

He fell silent again,

I pinched the bridge of my nose.

"This wasn't supposed to be about Gerard! Ugh! Look, my Dad is in trouble! Stefan has him captured..." I trailed of as I looked at him.

"and?" he asked, trying to help.

I laughed crazily know. "You know what? It's not even worth it if I tell you! You'll just try to put it against Gerard again!" I walked over to my door and opened it widely.

"Where are you going?" He asked shyly.

"I thought you could help me. You were my only hope, but you just don't get it anymore."

"Where are you going?" He asked again.

I stopped on my tracks, my hand tightening on the door handle.

"Somewhere. I don't know, There must be someone out there." I said, almost a whisper as I began walking down stairs.

"Wait! Let me Help"

I stopped again and turned my head, staring blankly at him. I shook my head and walked again to the door.

"If you want to help me, take care of Alec"

He was about to protest but decided to let is slide.

"What the hell is going on?!" A voice said, Me and Kazaf looked up to see an angry looking Alec.

"Alec, I have to go somewhere." I queered.

He only nodded. I felt a pang of a weird feeling in my stomach. He usually comes trotting dwon the stairs telling me how dangerous it was, but now nothing.

My lips twitched "Alec?"

"Yeah?" He asked as he went down stairs.

I inhaled "Fratello, io vi amo"

I smiled softly at him, it was our 'first word'. Whe we were learning Italian back then, when we were 12 it was the first thing we learned 'vi amo' which meant 'love you' we always said it to each other whenever we were down and needed someone to be there.

He cocked a brow at me "Huh? Yeah. Love you to sis."

I frowned, he wouldn't say that. He would say it in Italian and quote athor words but nothing.

"You're not Alec."