Boys Will Be Boys

"Raegan?....Raegan?" I hear Afton's voice bringing me back to reality.
"Y-yes?"
"What were you thinking about that made you smile like that?"
"Uhm," I start. "L-last n-night."
His mouth forms an 'O' then he smiles. "Y'know," He says, gripping my hips. "That was the best dry-hump I've ever had."
I giggle. "Oh, really now?" I lean down and kiss him.
When I pull away he replies, "Oh, yes. By far."

I stare down at him, not moving. I want to take in everything I can. I want it to be burned into my brain so I'll never have to spend another day only. Yes, I know that Afton claims he'll always be there for me, but what if he's not? I want to be able to remember him like this. Happy. I want to be able to know that at one point in my lifetime, I was happy. With him.

A hand strokes my cheek. "You're worrying. What's the matter, Rae?" I smile at his nickname for me.
"What if this," I motion to our bodies, "What if this doesn't last?"
His eyes become filled with sadness. "What do you mean?"
I climb off him and back on to my side of the bed. I don't look at him as I talk. "What if this.... this relationship turns out to be just like my others? What will happen if there comes a time when you can't be there for me? What if-"
"Raegan, stop it!" I finally make eye contact with him. I'm scared. He looks pissed off and he's coming towards me. "Raegan." He stops short and looks into my eyes.

He extends a hand in my direction and I back away. He looks confused and tries to advance on me again. But I back away again, trying my best to stay away from him. What if he hits me?

"Raegan." He whispers. And as if to come to a realization, his whole expression changes. "Oh, no. Raegan, I'm sorry. I would never hit you. You know that don't you?" He tries to reach for me again. But I jump off the bed, eyes wide and scared.

I don't listen to a single thing he says as I try to pull on my clothes. He just stares. His face pulling back into anger once again. I want to run. Run away from here. He gets up and saunters his way over to me. I back up towards the wall, having everything on except my shirt.

As I'm tugging it over my head, four words escape my lips. "P-please d-d-don't h-hurt me."

Afton

He thinks I'm going to hit him. I feel so bad. How dare someone break his spirit into so many pieces that he can't even handle being in the room with someone he looks even close to angry. I mean, I know it's way too soon to say so, but I love Raegan. Never would I hurt him like his father does. I'm not a violent guy.

I look at the sight that lies before me. Raegan stares at me with sad, scared eyes. "Raegan, please. I won't.."

But he doesn't listen. He runs out of my bedroom and leaves. And I just stand in the middle of my room feeling like an idiot. I don't chase after him. He needs space. But I just can't fathom how he would be so scared of me. Me, Afton? And it hurts even though I know it's not his fault. I wish he would realize that it's me, and I'll protect him. Always.

But then it makes me wonder......

Where's his mother during all of this?