This Christmas

“Can I sit here?”

To say that the voice startled Alex would be an understatement. He jumped slightly in his seat, clutching the napkin in his left hand with unnecessary force, causing the flimsy material to crinkle in his hands. He looked up from the words he had scribbled in blue pen on the surface, his eyes finding the source of the words that had been directed at him.

He didn’t look a day older than seventeen. His hair was a mess atop his head, sticking out in different directions; his face tinged a light shade of pink due to the harsh winds of the winter air. He was clutching a Starbucks hot chocolate in his left hand and multiple bags of what Alex presumed to be presents in his right. He had a small smile on his chapped lips and his eyebrows were raised, waiting patiently for Alex’s answer. Alex looked around, and upon finding that his table was indeed the only one with a spot open, he nodded his head.

The boy sat down across from him, a sigh of relief escaping his parted lips as he placed his bags on the floor and his cup on the table. He shook his hair out of his eyes before saying,

“I’m Garrett.” Alex nodded in response, letting his eyes retrace the words on the napkin still clutched tightly in his hand, his ears blocking out other sounds and his mind trying to find the train of thought he had left off on before he was interrupted. “Aren’t you going to tell me your name?”

Alex let an irritated sigh fall from the back of his throat-- his train of thought gone for the time-being-- and set his napkin and pen down on the table beside him, looking up at the intruder once more before answering,

“I’m Alex.” The boy smiled and Alex forced his lips to curl back over his teeth, but he was sure it looked more like a grimace than any smile, anyway. He had only just learned this boy’s name and he was already beginning to get on his nerves. But lately, everything had been getting on his nerves; he supposed this strange boy was no exception.

“So Alex, excited for Christmas?” Garrett asked, and Alex could tell there was a smile on his face, even if he wasn’t looking at him. He didn’t know what to say, honestly, because he didn’t know if this boy’s cheery disposition could withstand his honest outlook on the holiday.

He didn’t like the holidays, being forced to spend countless hours holed up with family members he hardly knew or could hardly stand—but was almost always the latter. He hated putting up the tree and spending too much time decorating cookies that would only be devoured in a matter of minutes. He hated that Christmas always got people’s hopes up, wishing and asking for things, only to be disappointed when they found that those things weren’t placed carefully under the tree on that fateful morning. Christmas brought nothing but disappointment, at least, in Alex’s opinion.

However, keeping his dreary thoughts to himself, Alex shrugged his shoulders before telling him,

“Yeah, I guess.”

An almost inaudible gasp left Garrett’s lips, but Alex’s keen ears caught the small sound. He rolled his eyes.

“You guess?” he questioned, as if he hadn’t really heard the first time. Alex nodded, looking up at Garrett. He had a shocked look on his face, his mouth agape the slightest bit as he sat back in his seat. Alex expected the kid to go on about how Christmas was a wonderful time, and that he should cherish the moments spent with family, the memories created during this special time. It’s what everyone told him—his friends, his family members. But instead, Garrett wiped the astonished expression off of his face and closed his mouth, reaching out to take a drink from his hot chocolate as he said, “Well, I’m excited.” He said it as if Alex had asked, as if he actually cared if the boy was even the slightest bit excited. Alex mimicked his actions, sitting back in his seat and grabbing his drink, the warm cup instantly warming his cold hands as he said,

“Well, then, what’s your take on Christmas?” A smile instantly spread across Garrett’s face, his lips pulling back to reveal a set of perfectly straight, white teeth as his whole face brightened. He took another drink from his cup before setting it down, leaning forward and resting his elbows on the table. He didn’t know how to explain, because Christmas meant a whole hell of a lot to Garrett. It meant spending more time with family and friends, free from his busy tour schedule and the pressure of being on stage. He loved decorating the tree with his mom and dad, sitting down at the dining room table with relatives he hasn’t seen since last year. He loved coming to visit his older brother, Trey, in Maryland, a nice break from the hot weather in Arizona. He liked shopping for presents and seeing the happy looks on people’s faces as they ripped open the intricately wrapped gift.

Garrett shook his head, his fringe falling in his eyes as he shrugged his shoulders. He couldn’t explain, especially not to someone like Alex, someone who seemingly had no love for the holiday. He couldn’t describe the warm feeling it set in his stomach or the permanent smile it painted on his face. They were simple feelings, ones you could acquire on a daily basis, but they were different for Garrett, they were something much more.

Garrett looked up, taking in the appearance of the man in front of him. There were dark circles under his eyes, making him look much older. A leather jacket was secured around his frame, a permanent frown set on his thin, pink lips. Garrett could see the beginnings of a tattoo on his wrist, but he didn’t let his eyes stay on the spot for too long. He could tell that Alex wasn’t in the mood to talk, his walls were up, trying to block him out with every ounce of strength he had. Though Alex’s tired and worn appearance told Garrett that he didn’t have much strength left.

Garrett had this nagging feeling in his stomach, this sudden urge to reach across the table and grab Alex’s hand. He didn’t know where it came from, but he didn’t act on it, simply watched as Alex continued to stare at him. Their eyes locked, and for a moment, Garrett swore he saw a slight tinge of pink infiltrate Alex’s pale face.

Alex turned his head to the side, letting his gaze fall from the young boy. He could feel the edges of his lips tugging up in a small smile, and he tried to hide it, clearing his throat as he asked,

“So, the Christmas enthusiast has nothing on say on the subject?” Garrett let a small laugh escape his lips, shrugging his shoulders once more in response.

“How would you know I’m an enthusiast?” he questioned, glancing at Alex with one eyebrow raised. Alex shook his head, nodding in the direction of the bags on the floor. They were filled to the brim with brightly wrapped packages, varying in shapes and sizes. Garrett’s smile was wide, a deep crimson color coming to his cheeks as he tried to hide his face. A laugh escaped Alex’s mouth as he looked back at Garrett, shaking his head once more. He hadn’t laughed in a while, surprised at the fact that such a stranger could evoke the whimsical sound from his mouth. It intrigued him, this stranger, that is. His smile was bright, despite the slush raining down from the sky and the bitter cold that hung in the air, and Alex couldn’t help but let a small smile grace his lips as well. Garrett just looked so happy, so carefree; Alex could learn a thing or two from him.

“I should probably get going…” Garrett let his words hang in the air, his eyebrows furrowed as he looked down at the watch on his wrist in disappointment, taking note of the fact that he and Alex were the only two people left in the café—even the employees had gone to the back room. Garrett was supposed to be back to his brother’s apartment by ten, and it was quarter to eleven. He looked back up at Alex, a sad smile coming to his lips as he stood from his seat, his chair making a high-pitched squealing noise as it scraped against the floor. Alex watched him from his seat dejectedly before saying,

“Well, it was nice meeting you, Garrett.” It was a half-hearted attempt at a goodbye, but Alex didn’t know what else to say. He wanted to ask if he could walk the young boy home, or give him a ride, or do anything to stay with him a little bit longer. His presence was intoxicating.

Garrett nodded at Alex, a silent way of telling him it was nice meeting him as well. He picked up his bags from the floor, willing his beat up Vans to drag his feet across the floor and to the door. Alex looked back at the table, a small frown tugging at his lips as he noticed the half-full, red cup still sitting across from him on the table.

Alex got up from his seat, jogging the short distance between the table and where Garrett now stood by the door. The younger boy turned at the tug of his arm, a confused look gracing his features as he stared up at the older man, his eyes darting from the cup in Alex’s left hand to his face and back. Their eyes locked, and for a moment, everything was still. The noises of the half snow half rain beating against the windows drowned out, leaving them encased in an eerie silence that seemed to echo throughout the whole coffee shop.

“You forgot your drink,” Alex mumbled, his voice soft and low as he stared down at Garrett. The boy had eyes like no other, eyes that drew you in and kept you there, not strong enough to find the will to pull your own eyes away from the intensity of those blue orbs. They were just close enough that Alex could see the hazel, almost gold, specks that glittered throughout Garrett’s eyes.

Before he could register what was happening, Garrett’s free hand was on his cheek, stroking the smooth surface with his thumb as he cupped the side of his face. He eyes were smoldering, making Alex’s heart flutter in a way that he had never felt before. The mere look he was giving him was overwhelming, making his breath irregular and his heartbeat speed up. But it didn’t end there, no, it got worse.

Because when Garrett’s lips connected with Alex’s, there was no way to explain the feeling that coursed throughout his body, sending tingles down his spine and to the tips of every extremity, before finding their way back to his stomach, causing the small flutters to erupt into an overload of butterflies, flying about his stomach haphazardly. His knees buckled, and if it weren’t for the fact that he was gripping onto the red zip-up that covered Garrett’s upper half with his free hand, Alex was sure he would have collapsed from the sensations racking through his frail body.

It was blissful, the way Garrett’s hand moved down to cup the side of his neck, caressing the soft skin. Alex’s grip tightened on the younger boy’s zip-up, pulling him closer to his body and winding his arm around the shorter man’s waist. The peppermint taste from the gum Alex had been chewing long before Garrett’s arrival mixed with the taste of the hot chocolate that both had been sipping from before, only adding to the experience as they tried to stand as close as possible in the heated coffee shop.

The kiss ended too soon for both the men’s liking, their breath coming out in small pants as they pulled away from each other. Garrett cleared his throat, a small chuckle leaving his swollen lips as he let his eyes drift upward. Alex followed his gaze, his lips turning up into a wider smile as he noticed the mistletoe hanging just above the entrance to Starbucks. He looked back down at Garrett, not able to take his eyes away from the man as he gathered his composure and sent him one last 100-wat smile before exiting.

Alex ran a hand through the mess of tangles atop his head, sighing as he realized Garrett’s cup was still in his hand. He went back to the table, putting together his things before following in Garrett’s path and heading toward the door. He reached out to throw the empty cups away, but just before he let go, Alex’s keen eyes caught a bit of writing on the side. It was a messy scrawl, but Alex could make out the handwriting, the widest of smiles coming to his face as he read the ten digits over and over again, storing them into his brain as not to forget.

Alex blushed at the words written underneath the phone number, but he couldn’t deny that he agreed with them.

Christmas is about taking time out of our busy lives to spend time with people we care about most, or least, or maybe people we don’t even know. It’s about taking chances and being spontaneous, like giving a complete stranger your phone number, or kissing said stranger underneath the mistletoe.