When You Were Young
Tales Of Another Broken Heart
Rae:
It'd been six years. Six whole years since I had seen him. Green Day had come out with a new CD titled 'American Idiot'. So conviniently put out just before the 2004 election. I'd bought it, of course, the first day it came out. But I never listened to it. Two years passed and I still havent listened to it. I knew there was one song on there that had something to do with me, and I knew that I wouldn't be able to handle it. So I wasn't going to risk it.
But, the CD sits on top of a shelf, right above my flat screen television that Scott had just bought us for our 1 year wedding anniversary. Yeah, I said it. One whole year. I met him a couple years ago...at Gilman Street. He was just another punk playing for just another band.
Of course, the day he decided he wanted to marry me he broke away from the band and got another job. We got married on July 7th, 2005. I had chosen the date. I never told Scott why I chose it. I never told Scott about the secret box that hides in the back of my closet. All he knew was that I had a secret past that I didn't want to talk about yet, and he was totally fine with that.
Me and Danica lost our friendship sometime after 2002. About a year after my last encounter with Billie Joe she'd gotten a job offer in New York City and was off to be a successful business woman.
Me? Hell, I did what I had said I would do, way back in July of '90.
I owned a Record Store. Not just any record store, but the one just off Telegraph Avenue. Right by Berkeley. I wasn't there much, seeing as I was the owner. But the cashflow was intense. Especially when we first put it there.
The place was full of those teenage "punks" everynight. They just flocked into the store to see what kind of old Vintage music we would have stocked up in the shelves. I loved it. I loved it more than anything. Not one day went by when Billie's face strayed from my mind. Not one day went by when I didn't think about him.
You're first love, you never forget.
No matter how tragic.
That day at Christie Road, behind Gilman's, when Billie Joe had given me that bracelet was the day that I realized that I was no longer the same Rae Richards I had been two weeks before.
I was heartbroken, yet happy.
That bracelet stayed with me for a couple years until I met Scott. He would always ask me why I never took it off, and how come it meant so much to me. But I'd never tell him. It's not that I like to keep secrets from him or anything, I just didn't think he needed to know.
He knew about my mom. My past. But he didn't know about Billie Joe. Hell, he couldn't.
The day Scott asked me to marry him I took that bracelet and I threw it. I threw it as hard as I possibly could. When it didn't go to far I angrily stomped over to the little plastic bracelet, crying as I did so. I picked it up and hung it on the tree. I hung it on the gnarled tree, in the back of Gilman's.
And I never saw it again.
So, of course, when Scott asked where it went I told him I had lost it.
July of 2008 was a memorable month. During that month, on my birthday, a new Green Day CD was out and in the open. Of course, one day I just happened to be flipping the channels when I stopped on MTV. There, looking snazzy in their suits, was Green Day, doing an interview.
I never watched that interview. I changed the channel before Billie was able to speak.
But what I did do was go out and buy that CD. The day it came out. I was there, first thing in the morning at Best Buy to get the damn thing. Only to have it sit on my shelf another 5 years.
But when I got home I did something else. I grabbed the dusty American Idiot off its place on the shelf and replaced it with their newest album. I looked down at the black and red cover and let out a small sigh.
Gingerly, I carefully opened the untouched CD case and took out the CD. I placed it in the stereo and slowly but surely pushed 'PLAY'. The opening chords to American Idiot came bursting through the speakers as a smile slowly played on my lips.
I sat on the couch and listened to the whole thing, all the way through. I stopped the CD momentarily, looking at the title of the last track.
Whatsername
I sighed and traced my fingers over the lyrics that were written out in the little book then pressed play. Whether or not he knew it. I knew that this song was about that girl that he'd met only in his dreams back in 1989.
That girl was me.
As I skimmed over the 'Thank You's I stopped, my eye's catching a familiar phrase. There, mixed in with all of the other unfamiliar names was not mine...but something else. In bolded letters it read
'The last song is for whatsername. From when we were young.'
I smiled, a single tear rolling down my cheek. Suddenly the door opened and I looked up, wiping my tear-stained face.
"Hey baby." Scott said softly, entering the room. "You okay?"
"Huh? Oh yeah, fine." I mumbled, quickly closing the cover and ejecting the CD.
"You finally listened to that? Huh?"
"Yeah. It's good. Real good."
"Did you catch their new one?" Scott asked, taking a seat in the chair right across from me.
I smiled and pointed to the shelf.
"Somethings I will never know." Scott said with a small laugh. Rae grinned and leaned forward, kissing him lightly.
"I'm going out. Okay?"
"Where?" Scott asked. I shrugged.
"I just need a little walk. I'll be back. Don't worry."
"Alright, be careful. Love you." Scott said with a small smile, turning on the TV.
"Yeah, love you too."
I grabbed my jacket and slipped it on as I walked out the door of our newly built home in San Francisco. I sighed as I walked down the streets. I just couldn't seem to get my mind off of the CD.
His face just wouldn't leave my mind during the entire walk. When I turned back down my street I noticed the mail man leaving something at our mail box. I raised one eyebrow. He'd already been once yesterday, besides the fact, it was Sunday, and Mail doesn't usually come on Sunday's.
"Hey Marty." I said, walking up to our mailbox.
"Miss, I'm sorry. I just found a letter stuffed down in the side of my car that was for you. No idea how long it's been there."
"Oh don't worry about it. Thanks." I said with a warm smile.
Marty had been a good friend of ours for over three years. He used to deliver the mail to my apartment up until I met Scott. Then when I moved we just kept in touch. Now and then he would come visit us.
But this letter, I just didn't understand. Marty hadn't delivered my mail in two years. Was this letter that old?
I opened the flap at the top and gently pulled out the letter inside.
[[Whatsername,
I don't know how I remembered you're address. But it just kind of came to me one day and I couldn't seem to get your face out of my head. That picture you gave me years ago is still sitting, framed, on a shelf in my bedroom. I just wanted to write you, and thank you for that. It really means a lot to me. And to not remember you at all it just kills me. I know that I know you from somewhere but I just don't seem to know where.
That day, behind Gilman's, was, God I don't even know what hit me. But I just want you to know that I haven't forgotten about you. And Maybe you could give me some hints to why I can't seem to get you out of my head.
I don't know if you even listen to our music, but enclosed is something that I hope you'll take me up on. Hope you like the new CD, if you've heard it yet that is. And make sure to read the 'Thank You's', and check out that last song on there. I think you'll like it.
Your stranger,
Billie Joe Armstrong]]
Rae looked back inside the envelope and let out a gasp when she pulled out two tickets and a pair of backstage passes to a Green Day concert. She sighed and looked at the tickets closer.
'May 16, 2005'
What she pulled out next she couldn't believe.
It was her bracelet.
Tears flooded her eyes as she held it up to the light. It was a little worn, but it had been saved. It had been saved by that same boy whom she had spent a lot of time with on Christie Road.
Rae placed the contents back into the envelope and held it tightly in her hands. She sighed and walked back into her house.
"Hey baby, I saw Marty out there. What's he doin?"
"Oh, just forgot something."
"What?" Scott asked curiously.
"It's just an old letter."
"From who?" Scott asked, munching on some chips.
Rae smiled and let out a soft sigh. "Just an old friend.
It'd been six years. Six whole years since I had seen him. Green Day had come out with a new CD titled 'American Idiot'. So conviniently put out just before the 2004 election. I'd bought it, of course, the first day it came out. But I never listened to it. Two years passed and I still havent listened to it. I knew there was one song on there that had something to do with me, and I knew that I wouldn't be able to handle it. So I wasn't going to risk it.
But, the CD sits on top of a shelf, right above my flat screen television that Scott had just bought us for our 1 year wedding anniversary. Yeah, I said it. One whole year. I met him a couple years ago...at Gilman Street. He was just another punk playing for just another band.
Of course, the day he decided he wanted to marry me he broke away from the band and got another job. We got married on July 7th, 2005. I had chosen the date. I never told Scott why I chose it. I never told Scott about the secret box that hides in the back of my closet. All he knew was that I had a secret past that I didn't want to talk about yet, and he was totally fine with that.
Me and Danica lost our friendship sometime after 2002. About a year after my last encounter with Billie Joe she'd gotten a job offer in New York City and was off to be a successful business woman.
Me? Hell, I did what I had said I would do, way back in July of '90.
I owned a Record Store. Not just any record store, but the one just off Telegraph Avenue. Right by Berkeley. I wasn't there much, seeing as I was the owner. But the cashflow was intense. Especially when we first put it there.
The place was full of those teenage "punks" everynight. They just flocked into the store to see what kind of old Vintage music we would have stocked up in the shelves. I loved it. I loved it more than anything. Not one day went by when Billie's face strayed from my mind. Not one day went by when I didn't think about him.
You're first love, you never forget.
No matter how tragic.
That day at Christie Road, behind Gilman's, when Billie Joe had given me that bracelet was the day that I realized that I was no longer the same Rae Richards I had been two weeks before.
I was heartbroken, yet happy.
That bracelet stayed with me for a couple years until I met Scott. He would always ask me why I never took it off, and how come it meant so much to me. But I'd never tell him. It's not that I like to keep secrets from him or anything, I just didn't think he needed to know.
He knew about my mom. My past. But he didn't know about Billie Joe. Hell, he couldn't.
The day Scott asked me to marry him I took that bracelet and I threw it. I threw it as hard as I possibly could. When it didn't go to far I angrily stomped over to the little plastic bracelet, crying as I did so. I picked it up and hung it on the tree. I hung it on the gnarled tree, in the back of Gilman's.
And I never saw it again.
So, of course, when Scott asked where it went I told him I had lost it.
July of 2008 was a memorable month. During that month, on my birthday, a new Green Day CD was out and in the open. Of course, one day I just happened to be flipping the channels when I stopped on MTV. There, looking snazzy in their suits, was Green Day, doing an interview.
I never watched that interview. I changed the channel before Billie was able to speak.
But what I did do was go out and buy that CD. The day it came out. I was there, first thing in the morning at Best Buy to get the damn thing. Only to have it sit on my shelf another 5 years.
But when I got home I did something else. I grabbed the dusty American Idiot off its place on the shelf and replaced it with their newest album. I looked down at the black and red cover and let out a small sigh.
Gingerly, I carefully opened the untouched CD case and took out the CD. I placed it in the stereo and slowly but surely pushed 'PLAY'. The opening chords to American Idiot came bursting through the speakers as a smile slowly played on my lips.
I sat on the couch and listened to the whole thing, all the way through. I stopped the CD momentarily, looking at the title of the last track.
Whatsername
I sighed and traced my fingers over the lyrics that were written out in the little book then pressed play. Whether or not he knew it. I knew that this song was about that girl that he'd met only in his dreams back in 1989.
That girl was me.
As I skimmed over the 'Thank You's I stopped, my eye's catching a familiar phrase. There, mixed in with all of the other unfamiliar names was not mine...but something else. In bolded letters it read
'The last song is for whatsername. From when we were young.'
I smiled, a single tear rolling down my cheek. Suddenly the door opened and I looked up, wiping my tear-stained face.
"Hey baby." Scott said softly, entering the room. "You okay?"
"Huh? Oh yeah, fine." I mumbled, quickly closing the cover and ejecting the CD.
"You finally listened to that? Huh?"
"Yeah. It's good. Real good."
"Did you catch their new one?" Scott asked, taking a seat in the chair right across from me.
I smiled and pointed to the shelf.
"Somethings I will never know." Scott said with a small laugh. Rae grinned and leaned forward, kissing him lightly.
"I'm going out. Okay?"
"Where?" Scott asked. I shrugged.
"I just need a little walk. I'll be back. Don't worry."
"Alright, be careful. Love you." Scott said with a small smile, turning on the TV.
"Yeah, love you too."
I grabbed my jacket and slipped it on as I walked out the door of our newly built home in San Francisco. I sighed as I walked down the streets. I just couldn't seem to get my mind off of the CD.
His face just wouldn't leave my mind during the entire walk. When I turned back down my street I noticed the mail man leaving something at our mail box. I raised one eyebrow. He'd already been once yesterday, besides the fact, it was Sunday, and Mail doesn't usually come on Sunday's.
"Hey Marty." I said, walking up to our mailbox.
"Miss, I'm sorry. I just found a letter stuffed down in the side of my car that was for you. No idea how long it's been there."
"Oh don't worry about it. Thanks." I said with a warm smile.
Marty had been a good friend of ours for over three years. He used to deliver the mail to my apartment up until I met Scott. Then when I moved we just kept in touch. Now and then he would come visit us.
But this letter, I just didn't understand. Marty hadn't delivered my mail in two years. Was this letter that old?
I opened the flap at the top and gently pulled out the letter inside.
[[Whatsername,
I don't know how I remembered you're address. But it just kind of came to me one day and I couldn't seem to get your face out of my head. That picture you gave me years ago is still sitting, framed, on a shelf in my bedroom. I just wanted to write you, and thank you for that. It really means a lot to me. And to not remember you at all it just kills me. I know that I know you from somewhere but I just don't seem to know where.
That day, behind Gilman's, was, God I don't even know what hit me. But I just want you to know that I haven't forgotten about you. And Maybe you could give me some hints to why I can't seem to get you out of my head.
I don't know if you even listen to our music, but enclosed is something that I hope you'll take me up on. Hope you like the new CD, if you've heard it yet that is. And make sure to read the 'Thank You's', and check out that last song on there. I think you'll like it.
Your stranger,
Billie Joe Armstrong]]
Rae looked back inside the envelope and let out a gasp when she pulled out two tickets and a pair of backstage passes to a Green Day concert. She sighed and looked at the tickets closer.
'May 16, 2005'
What she pulled out next she couldn't believe.
It was her bracelet.
Tears flooded her eyes as she held it up to the light. It was a little worn, but it had been saved. It had been saved by that same boy whom she had spent a lot of time with on Christie Road.
Rae placed the contents back into the envelope and held it tightly in her hands. She sighed and walked back into her house.
"Hey baby, I saw Marty out there. What's he doin?"
"Oh, just forgot something."
"What?" Scott asked curiously.
"It's just an old letter."
"From who?" Scott asked, munching on some chips.
Rae smiled and let out a soft sigh. "Just an old friend.