Until Death Do Us Part
Love Is A Resistance
It wasn’t long until Rose moved in with me, well, with us. Little Emma was too young to understand the whole situation and found it very exciting to have a new mommy. Abby, my younger sister wasn’t so thrilled with the whole Rosalie-affair but as the outsider, there wasn’t much she could do about it and all she did was biting her tongue.
Things were going pretty well the first months. She was just so nice to Em, and the picture was perfect, just like I wanted it to be. I guess I always kept that picture in mind because times changed but I couldn’t see it.
It was one year later, somewhere in the middle of October as I still can remember when she had thrown away every single photograph with Christina in it. Honestly, I didn’t even notice it at first. It was my little angel who came to me in tears, crying that the photo with her and mommy in her room was gone. Rose didn’t say much about it. The only explanation she gave was “You’ve got to move on.” I agreed with her, it was time to move on. Plus, it must be hard for her replacing someone else, right? But the voice in my head told me it wasn’t about replacing Christina, it was about something that only mattered for her. The truth burns deep inside and will never die, I guess.
Her smile was fading the longer we were together; her attitude towards Emma got bitchy. The bitterness inside her was growing like the newborn and her mask was gone. Everyone around me was witnessing the whole process but kept their mouth shut wisely, except for my sister. Abby was furious and tried to talk some sense into me, but failed. Pain was written all over her face. “You’re pushing yourself and her into self-destruction” she whispered the day she left. With her she didn’t mean Rose but Emma. I ignored her words and never saw her again. So it was up to me now to get things straight (which wasn’t going to happen). I tried to give her up but I was addicted.
‘Who you were, was so beautiful’ I told myself. That was one big lie. She wasn’t beautiful at all, but the way she looked…. Like a copy of Chris. And Christina was the one who was beautiful, from the outside and the inside. She was amazing. Her love and passion for life, for Emma was incredible. For someone who loved living so much her life was just too short. Thirty-four years old, all ended by one plane crash.
All Rosalie wanted was money, my money. Let’s say I’m anything but poor. Something Chris never cared about. She didn’t have to work, but she did and she worked hard. There was one other thing they both had in common: their strong will for achieving their dreams.
As another year passed by I felt my world crumbling, my life crumbling, my soul crumbling away with her. I watched my fantasies decay and knew nothing would be the same. How did it come to this? I had been egoistic and I was paying the price for it. And I wouldn’t mind at all if it was just me but Emma was the one who paid the highest price and that was something I’ll never forgive myself.
At a certain moment it hit me all at once. I could play the game and lose, but I didn’t have to lose it all. So I made a backup plan.
Things were getting worse and worse and time was running out. It scared the hell out of me and the end was all I could see. And then the moment was there……….
One day she asked me for the code of the safe. I should trust her some more after two years of knowing each other. That was her excuse. I gave it to her without hesitating, just like that. She was surprised, I could tell from the look on her face, even though she tried to hide it. She kissed me gently and went to the kitchen. All the fear that I had before was gone. Whatever she was up to, this was it.
Something popped in the kitchen and after a few minutes she came back with two glasses full of wine. She sat down next to me on the couch and handed me one of the glasses. “To us” she said while smiling her crooked smile. I looked her in the eyes, trying to read them. They were cold as ice. “Until death do us part” I whispered and took a sip of my wine.
I didn’t feel anything at first but after a little while I got a bit nauseous and dizzy. In my last moments I observed her. She smiled, the game was over. When I closed my eyes I forced myself to think about the good times. Me and Christina’s first date, our wedding, the birth of Emma, the three of us together. I saw Christina’s smile, so sweet, so warm, the opposite of Roses smile. Now I saw that Rosalie couldn’t compare with her at all. She was so much better and more beautiful than her. And remembering her smiling like that I knew I was going home.
Things were going pretty well the first months. She was just so nice to Em, and the picture was perfect, just like I wanted it to be. I guess I always kept that picture in mind because times changed but I couldn’t see it.
It was one year later, somewhere in the middle of October as I still can remember when she had thrown away every single photograph with Christina in it. Honestly, I didn’t even notice it at first. It was my little angel who came to me in tears, crying that the photo with her and mommy in her room was gone. Rose didn’t say much about it. The only explanation she gave was “You’ve got to move on.” I agreed with her, it was time to move on. Plus, it must be hard for her replacing someone else, right? But the voice in my head told me it wasn’t about replacing Christina, it was about something that only mattered for her. The truth burns deep inside and will never die, I guess.
Her smile was fading the longer we were together; her attitude towards Emma got bitchy. The bitterness inside her was growing like the newborn and her mask was gone. Everyone around me was witnessing the whole process but kept their mouth shut wisely, except for my sister. Abby was furious and tried to talk some sense into me, but failed. Pain was written all over her face. “You’re pushing yourself and her into self-destruction” she whispered the day she left. With her she didn’t mean Rose but Emma. I ignored her words and never saw her again. So it was up to me now to get things straight (which wasn’t going to happen). I tried to give her up but I was addicted.
‘Who you were, was so beautiful’ I told myself. That was one big lie. She wasn’t beautiful at all, but the way she looked…. Like a copy of Chris. And Christina was the one who was beautiful, from the outside and the inside. She was amazing. Her love and passion for life, for Emma was incredible. For someone who loved living so much her life was just too short. Thirty-four years old, all ended by one plane crash.
All Rosalie wanted was money, my money. Let’s say I’m anything but poor. Something Chris never cared about. She didn’t have to work, but she did and she worked hard. There was one other thing they both had in common: their strong will for achieving their dreams.
As another year passed by I felt my world crumbling, my life crumbling, my soul crumbling away with her. I watched my fantasies decay and knew nothing would be the same. How did it come to this? I had been egoistic and I was paying the price for it. And I wouldn’t mind at all if it was just me but Emma was the one who paid the highest price and that was something I’ll never forgive myself.
At a certain moment it hit me all at once. I could play the game and lose, but I didn’t have to lose it all. So I made a backup plan.
Things were getting worse and worse and time was running out. It scared the hell out of me and the end was all I could see. And then the moment was there……….
One day she asked me for the code of the safe. I should trust her some more after two years of knowing each other. That was her excuse. I gave it to her without hesitating, just like that. She was surprised, I could tell from the look on her face, even though she tried to hide it. She kissed me gently and went to the kitchen. All the fear that I had before was gone. Whatever she was up to, this was it.
Something popped in the kitchen and after a few minutes she came back with two glasses full of wine. She sat down next to me on the couch and handed me one of the glasses. “To us” she said while smiling her crooked smile. I looked her in the eyes, trying to read them. They were cold as ice. “Until death do us part” I whispered and took a sip of my wine.
I didn’t feel anything at first but after a little while I got a bit nauseous and dizzy. In my last moments I observed her. She smiled, the game was over. When I closed my eyes I forced myself to think about the good times. Me and Christina’s first date, our wedding, the birth of Emma, the three of us together. I saw Christina’s smile, so sweet, so warm, the opposite of Roses smile. Now I saw that Rosalie couldn’t compare with her at all. She was so much better and more beautiful than her. And remembering her smiling like that I knew I was going home.