Make This Perfect Again

Everyone had stayed over at my house that night. Josh, Matt, Mike and Ian all slept in their van so my house wouldn't get too crowded. At about 8 in the morning, when everyone was eating breakfast in my living room, there was a knock at my door. I looked at everyone else. Everyone was here, inclduing Keith and Jason. I got up from the couch, Airin sniping my spot as soon as I got to the door. I opened the door only to see John there. "Oh! Hi John. What are you doing here?" I asked. I was trying to block his view from the rest of the house, but my height was no match for John's 5'10" height.

"I just wanted to say goodbye. I'm leaving this morning, you're leaving this morning..." He said. I nodded.

"Oh, right. Okay, well bye." I went to close the door on him, but he stopped it with his foot.

"What's the rush to get me gone?" John pushed the door open, revealing mostly everyone in the house. "What, you're having a party with out me?" He laughed and side stepped into the house. I tried to grasp onto his jacket, but he moved too quickly for me. I stood there, rather embarassed. John looked back at me, then back at everyone else. Marque and Mariah simutaniously got up and left the living room. Airin's feet shuffled around awkwardly. Josh had basically plastered himself against the wall in a poor attempt to hide himself. Keith, who didn't know John just sat on the floor eating his honeycombs. Jason doing the same. "Oh." John looked rather speechless. "Hello everyone..." John said, his eyes still on me. Then he noticed Josh, and I could tell that Johns eyes had locked on Josh, because Josh looked away from John. "Maybe I should get going." John turned around and walked out the open door, closing it behind him. I saw Josh look at me appologetically. I turned around and ran after John.

"John. John wait." It was a bad idea to walk out into my driveway with bare feet, because my drive way was basically all rock and dirt, with the occasional pine needle. John was ignoring me, but I wasn't going to let that stop me. "Johnathan Augustus Baker, stop right now." I said, grabbing the top of his car door before he got into his car. He stopped and looked at me. "What is your problem?"

"What is my problem? My problem is that you have your ex over at your house." John sneered. I looked at him, unaffected by his tone. He had spoken to me enough times like that, I was used to it. "That just makes me question...us." he said, his tone not changing one bit.

"John, are you assuming that I would sleep with Josh?" John nodded. I folded my arms across my chest."You know, sometimes you are extremely thick-headed." I said.

"How?" He frowned at me.

"Look, John,I'm not the kind of girl to sleep around when I have a boyfriend." I glared at John. "You, on the other hand..."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"You know what it fucking means. I forgave you when you slept with Elaine, didn't I?" I nearly yelled at him. I was pretty sure the others were watching from the window or the still opened door, because I never heard it close. "Just because you'd do it, doesn't mean I would!" John stood there, slightly stunned. I pinched the bridge of my nose. "John, give me my spare key." I held out my free hand.

"Wh..what?" John looked flabbergasted.

"My key. Now." I looked at him, my eyes narrowed, the tone of my voice was vicious.

"Josline...come on..." John closed the car door and stepped towards me.

"John, no. I want my fucking key back." I said. "And I don't want you to come back here."

"Okay, Josline, you're being a little bit unreasonable."

"And you're being jealous. I understand that you're uncomfortable with me being around Josh, but that doesn't mean that you can be the arrogant prick you always have been." John looked at me for a few moments.

"You still love him, don't you." That caught me off gaurd. I was flustered for a minute before I regained my composure.

"Key. Now." I said, my hand held out infront of me again. John dug in his pocket and threw my key at the ground towards my feet."And don't even try to contact me John. Not if you're going to be an ass." John didn't say anything. He got in his car and slammed the door shut. He drove off, and I just stood in my drive way, watching the car dissapear down the road. I sighed and bent down to pick up the key laying in the dirt. I dusted it off and held onto it. Had I really broken up with John? In a way, I was happy, because he was just depressing me even more. It's true, I did forgive him when he slept with Elaine. I probably shouldn't of forgiven him, but I did, because I thought I loved him too much. Thinking back, I didn't love him. I just had abadonment issues, so if I broke up wth John, I would feel alone all over again. But this time, it felt different. I didn't feel any sort of abandonment. I looked back behind me to see Airin, Marque and Josh all looking out of the window. I looked at Josh for a few second before he dissapeared, only to reappear at the door. He started to step out of the house. "Josh, shoes." I said. Josh nodded and slipped on his shoes. He walked over to me and awkwardly hugged me. It was more like a friendly hug than a romantic hug.

But I'd settle for an awkward hug from Josh any day.